I threw my compass overboard
Along with all my gear for a snowy day
I got tan and fat
Gorging myself on fresh catch
I like to lay with my face to the sun
And remind myself
how lucky I am to be at sea
How lucky I am to be free

Fear seers
the sweetest brandings
Into our flesh
When we conquer it
How much I adore my badges

Its not love we write poems about after all
Love is constant and unwavering
reliable and anchoring
The sea walls can shift and the tide can break
Love isn’t what we write poems about after all
Love is what we take for granted
Deeply anchored granite
We cling to its faithful grooves
Love isn’t what we write poems about after all
Thats chaos swimming wildly towards danger
With a thirsty craze in our eye
Propelled by wells of angst and desire
Away from the cool loving grey of a stable rock
Wide nostrils and salty sea breath
Gnarled hair and ***** fingernails
It is not love we write poems about after all
Thats heroine of the heart
Hurling a howling hunger
Towards hauntings
Hellbound and twirling
Its not love we write poems about after all

For how long can I brush you
Into the retro neon landscape
Before you crumble under the pressure
Of my meticulous mental carvings
You’ve evolved
holographic
By my wishful watercolors
And I love you so much that way
I forget
That I’m the one directing the light

He’s like the tide
A surfer must enjoy his ride
Dive in and swim, revering him
Forgetting what’s outside
His waves are wondrous, warm, enchanting
Adventure filled in all their crashing
The ocean though
Has rules you know, and those it cannot break
For as I try to fight the tide
I find it’s my mistake
No Siren’s Song
No tug along
Could change his constant wake
As good as it may feel to me
To bask amidst his splendor
His salty sea breath smothers me
Unable to surrender
He’s faithful as he’s always been
Unchanging, strong, and genuine
It’s me, you see
Too wild and free
To float in him forever

Does he love me?
I think so
But oceans know their bounds
So as I go beyond his flow
The follow earthly sounds
Perhaps he’d like to follow me
To soar the mountain peaks
To leave the sea, dance blissfully
With sunlight on his cheeks
Perhaps he would create with me
a world of our design
Alas he knows that sea is sea
And he can never follow

Does he love me?
I know so
Although he can’t come with me
To sandy shore, find earth’s galore
***’ he is he – part of the sea
Entrapped by gravity

A fantasy
You are to me
A tidy tailored dream
Where all the messy parts of me
Fit neatly in the seam

Where you and I would fall in love
On sparkling Mississippi
You’re captain of our river boat
And I’m the glam-est hippie

Every day is fresh cut fruit
And belly laughs with friends
Chilled Busch Lite in the cooler
Sunny summer never ends

We party at the oyster bar
And laugh ourselves to sleep
It’s candy apple USA
A tan that you can keep

Our tribe is in the valley
With the lighthouse at the dock
We’ll drink and talk our nights away
Amidst the limestone rock

A fantasy
Can only be
Kept while you close your eye
Beneath your stupid captain’s hat
You’re just another guy

Oh dare be the happy girl
Go soar the world with glee
And never fear the things they say
For rich in life you’ll be

And don’t you know the happy girl
Is prettiest by far?
***’ all her imperfections
Are just kisses from a star

The happy girl will never age
Those sunspots on her cheeks
Are badges from the mountain tops
And hot Havana weeks

You’ll love to be the happy girl
The stories of a muse
Are preciously adorning her
In form of scars and bruise

When you become the happy girl
You’ll love yourself so well
That everyone will love you too
Because it’s clear to tell

The happy girl knows how to play
Might find her in a tree
Or beaches combed for shells and teeth
or dancing near the sea

I challenge you, the happy girl
Although I never could
I hope you’ll sail much farther than
The sad girl ever would

Do you dream of me free
Not how happy we’d be
imagine me at sea
tucked up in a tree
While you’re straddled with she
Do you dream of me free

Do you think of me wild
Like when we were a child
How I laughed and I smiled
How my beauty beguiled
How my hair would be styled
Do you think of me wild

Do you speak of me fond
“She’s a queen from beyond”
Though I never respond
So you married a blonde
Do you speak of me fond

I dream of you bound
A storm without sound
Trapped on cold ground
I dream of you bound

I think of you mild
Stock white paper filed
Just a number I dialed
I think of you mild

I speak of you nill
Just a pound of my quill
And a pop of a pill
But I speak of you nill

He’ll think it’s hot that you’re running
Ask him to meet up for a marathon
…half marathon?
Tread lighter.
Running dogs
Dogs running
A meme of a dog running for president

I’m sick of writing sad poems
It’s all I ever do
My fingers tug my heartstrings
And the only notes are you

I can't take you with me
the trail's too steep
but I'll pack a few blurry pieces of you
sea shells and sand grain
boating and Busch Light

I'm rolling up your long, loud laugh
and putting it where the socks go.
so when I rest again,
I can unzip,
and hear you.
through tattered mesh pockets
holding fuzzy drunk photos
too fleeting and fast, your face

I’m taking you with me
The scraps of your smile folded into my sweater
Your voice explodes
As I roll my sunny yellow dress to fit

Perhaps I'll wear your laughter
to a party in some other town
to compliment my flower crown

I’ve never cared for puzzles
You’re the edges
Pie crust promises and paper cuts
I’m the miscellaneous pink parts
Coffee lipstick and heart emojis
Built and belabored
Only to become
Bits in a box

Goodbye is such a bitter word
I truly loath to say.
I hope you know I loved you wild,
It's why I left that day.

Some men bring out the poems in me
I fear your one of these
A pirate girl names ships about
To sail the world with ease

I fear not what you do to me
I fear not what I know
Someday your heart will melt and be
Repla-ced with the snow

So on she’ll sail
Through snowy veil
To fight the world deplete
And She and I
Through wind and rye
Will storm the army fleet

A salient heat
Will soon repeat.

I want to seashell hunt in the stars,
discover pieces of your laugh
scattered on windy shores of Mars.

I want to drop kick you across our living room
slander your name through our circle
tell your mother how monstrous you are

In the morning

we wake up yellow
bright to greet the day
happy constance in a radical world

Those sunny bits
slow burn to bitter ashy orange
the edges of your ears exhaust smoke
smirking hollow eyes
smothered by salty storm
sinking ship

I’m leaving you here
At our sleepy harbor dock
The place we used to drink and talk
Our faces lit by moon
But I’ll forget you soon
Please drift off down the river now
So I won’t be reminded how
Your laughter lit the night
Float gently out of sight

“It can’t be love.”
He cooed at me
Melodic Latin tongue
But I’d already fell in love
With every song he’d sung

That night we met
the stars ignited magic in the breeze
With princess vibes
I led our tribes
I had him on his knees

We danced the night away again
I sat upon his lap
“Que pasa te?” He winked at me
I’m caught up in his trap

He asked me to make sure that I
Was staying not for him
With crooked eye
He said goodbye
Emotionless and glim

I told him that I hated him
And how he’d led me on
He’s just a firework fantasy
They sparkle
Then they’re gone

He taught me that a gypsy love
Is best left undefined
This beach towns not the only thing
I have to leave behind

You’re a figment of the flavors in my imagination
Poems used to flow from me
like pitchers on filthy Friday
When I could taste your fruity orange
So I canned you cleverly to keep
My own jarred jam
growing richer with time
You’re mixed with coriander and cardamom
Rich and bitter
Complex and aromatic like an after dinner liquor

You were not so complicated
Fresh and shockingly sweet
ripe juicy laughter
But I can't taste your **** tangerine anymore
Just aged jelly
Tainted by my sugared imagination
Salted by hallucinogenic memories

You never tasted like a jar of jam
I ******* own bitterness
My own fear inflected upon your sunny orange smile
You aren’t old and canned
You’re dynamic and quick
A marathon sprinter
A warm melting winter

He makes me want to write
Frantically
As fast as my fingers can produce the
Sweet caramel lava oozing
Dip my quill in his laughter
The way he tells a joke
The way he made me feel
That in an instant I had woke

I carve him into all my blank pages
Splash his spirit
Encrypting his words
So they won’t evaporate
so quickly
ink pen swimming in his silliness
The way he looked at me
The time we tripped on acid
And just gazed out at the sea

So, you’re letting me fly
And why shouldn’t I?
I’m vibrant and high

But I’ll tell you a lie:
I don’t want you to pry
At my life as I fly
To watch me **** by
Cherry pie in the sky

And they expected you to be blue
Boring blue
Or a color they knew
And they expected you to be square
Standing straight and strong
Rigid edges so sharply defined
That fingers running down it’s cool perimeter would form a thin ****** line
How simple
To be a ****** blue square
But you were more rare
I saw you there through the glare
Light reflecting glittering glass
Fearless technicolor rainbows dancing
Only for me
Wild voodoo

Try on his music
Dazzle in his social scene
Clip his jokes in your hair
Tailor his knowledge to suit you
Check out your *** when it’s wrapped in his hand
Twirl in his questions
Bold crisp questions
Tuck the tag
Take his expensive taste for a spin
And return him within 90 days