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1.6k · Jun 2015
Homewrecker
Kelly N Jun 2015
It does not take your pain away,
It ***** the humanity out of you
Innocent, vulnerable as a baby
I have been looking for your soul for years,
Your eyes are filled with loneliness,
Nobody is there anymore

How can you save someone that is long gone?
Living in the past is the entrance to darkness
If you cease to be would you care?
Would you cry? Or would you finally find peace?
Close your eyes now, imagine the heavenly shelter that I have built for you,
and hear me whispering “ It is just a matter of time” .
1.2k · Jun 2015
Magic city
Kelly N Jun 2015
At the crack of dawn the city is slowly waking up,
walking through these big streets, the cold breeze has become my friend
A beautiful scenery is in front of me, like a living painting, I’m amazed by this city
I have to stop in order to capture those precious moments
My heart is filled with joy, and in my ear a cheerful song is playing

I don’t want it to stop, I want to live here forever!
Following the same path every morning,
This precious path where I’m surrounded by all kind of people
I can hear this beautiful language spoken through the streets
The liffey river is waving at me, I’m almost there,
Finally, I have reached it, Trinity College
Towards the front gate, I have to press pause
Students are rushing  around me, but I stand still
Time stops for a brief moment
Taking a deep breath, it is now my turn to run through the buildings

At last, I belong somewhere…
I hope to see you again, beautiful Dublin, you gave me so much
It is a goodbye for now
911 · Jun 2015
If I could turn back time
Kelly N Jun 2015
I'll tell to my younger self that there is no such thing as “ the one”,
Only feelings that come and go,
I'll tell to my younger self that friendship is not meant to last forever, friends come and go as well,
I'll tell her that it is okay to make mistakes because we always learn from them,
If I could turn back time, I'll tell to my younger self to embrace herself instead of being friend with loneliness and low-self esteem,
I'll tell her that people are not always with good intentions and that she will have to be careful, but to always have a big heart and bring solace to others.
If I could turn back time, I'll tell to my younger self that time is precious.
Kelly N Jun 2015
I have spent my day watching series,
Trying to put my thoughts on mute
Focusing on anything but the reality,
What else can I do?

Dreaming the pain away,
Hoping that it will be a distant nightmare,
Staring at the screen, my thoughts are slowly drifting away,
Don’t press stop yet…
368 · Jul 2015
The filter
Kelly N Jul 2015
Where this time go?
Where the simpliest things used to make us happy
Where there were no quarrels, and no bleakness in our hearts
Where everything was seen under a colorful filter,
This time of innoncence, where imagination was at its highest
Would we be able to take some of it back?, we all need a little bit of colors in our hearts,
This precious time called childhood, when it was okay to make mistakes
Where someone was looking upon your shoulders for you,
Over the years the colors of this filter have faded away

Gray seems to be prevaiding it,
It’s a sad reality when you realize that your happiness depends on somebody else,
that person has the power to bring new amazing colors into your life, but can easily take them back,
It’s time that we reconcile with ourselves, and find this happiness that once filled our lives
Would we be able to do that?
As a sign the clouds are slowly moving away, and the warthm is gently comforting our bodies,
Embrace it, the best is yet to come.
341 · Feb 2016
Timeline
Kelly N Feb 2016
And at this precise moment,
pain took over Love and anger took over pain,
Will it be the end?

Promises that were never fufilled,
Like a catchy song, I can't get your words out of my head
But the intent was the same, you sold something that wasn't real

You met me in between

And I hate you for making me fall in love with you that easily,
For taking me for granted,for not being there at my worst

For selling love to other birds, while I was holding on to any butterfly left in your stomach,

But, most importantly, I hate YOU for giving up on us, WHILE I was building up our timeline...
And at this moment,
Patience took over anger, and wisdom took over patience
I'm not out there fishing for answers anymore

BECAUSE, I was the one holding them all along
332 · Jul 2015
Falling star
Kelly N Jul 2015
Wandering around like a lonely soul,
Your light is weak
People barely notice you
Are you a fallen angel?
How did you end up on earth?
Disappointement crosses your face as you walk through the crowd
Nobody is there anymore to tell you what to do,
Will you tell Him that we have failed?

Golden tears dropped on the floor,
The only proof of your existence
Too much hate among humankind,
Would you be able to take that away?
Or is it our punishment?
What if all this was just a nightmare?
Open your eyes now and tell everything to the others,
Can your hear the birds singing? Can you feel the sun?
Hurry up, you do not have much time left
The humanity relies on you,
O young angelic soldier.
328 · Dec 2015
A cloud of smoke
Kelly N Dec 2015
Blank eyes,
Nothing but, regrets,
The lady wanders through her loss,
Living the same tedious routine, she is consumed by this cloud of gray smoke,

She can't see that her old self is drowning in the lake of memories,

Like another life,
The ladies are not alike anymore,
The mirror breaks, and she can't utter a single word
LIFELESS, she is waiting for Love to come back.
326 · Jun 2016
Missed calls
Kelly N Jun 2016
I ripped every ounce of you out of my brain, but  I still couldn’t feel lighter, I dried my tears with a paper glass, the ones that you shaped, see I thought loving you would have been a relief, but it only gave me grief, deep at night my cracked heart is still calling you,

but yours, has been on voicemail for way too long
321 · Jun 2015
The pensive
Kelly N Jun 2015
Look me in the eyes,
Tell me that you still feel it, that you have been trying to move on, but in vain,
That like me your heart beats fast just at the mention of my name
Whisper to me these three precious words,
hold me tight, protect me from this heartless world
Sing me a lullaby to help me fall asleep, and in the morning wake me up with tender kisses,
Take me back to that place where we felt that we were the only lovers of this world,
Where there was nothing but passion:

Would you help me revive those precious moments?
Staring at the moon, I wonder, does your mind often wanders back to me as mine does?
Like a sleepwalker I walk through our love,
Yet our love is just like a movie now, it ended
The reality is urging me to let you go, to forget that once upon a time there was an “us”
What are you supposed to do when you’ve found the perfect match?
A million thoughts are rushing through my head,
They overwhelmed me, and as my last thought goes to you,
Happy tears drop on our photos, and while I try to close this chapter,
your voice echoes in my head and gently says to me “ Farewell my love”
305 · Jun 2015
Nostalgia
Kelly N Jun 2015
As I walk through the park, my mind keeps going back to you
Was it real? Or was it all in my head?
A charismatic look, an angelic voice I was doomed from the start,
I remember this cold evening, you were waiting for me,
I observed you from a distance everyone around you was blurred
Sometimes I wished that our paths never crossed
Will I see you again? Or was it all?

It is now summer time, this cold evening is now seasons away from me,
But I still remember every detail of it,
I can feel the sun on my skin, I can see happy couples holding hands,
I want to let you go, but my heart is stubborn
Will you tell him the truth?, Tell him that he has been a fool  that feelings can’t disappear in the blink of an eye
I dare you to look me in the eyes one last time,
But everything is so far away now,
I see you holding hands with a much prettier girl than me,
You do not glance at me, not once
As I walk away from you, the sound of my heartbeat fades away
294 · Mar 2016
Alien
Kelly N Mar 2016
I have lost the notion of Home, the day that you came in
Your vanity broke my shelter into pieces
Tiptoeing in my own house, I felt like a stranger
Years passed and the pressure was unbearable
Your hate suffocated the whole house
Leaving in order to heal,was the only medicine,
Not once did I feel homesick,

I was able to see life through a fresh pair of eyes
Yet the minute I came back I started to see black
Feeling homesick for the first time for a country that isn’t mine,

Isn’t it ironic?
293 · Oct 2016
I love you ?
Kelly N Oct 2016
AND at this moment, that special person of yours, should look at you straight in the eye, and make you feel the intensity at the other end of that promise  “I love you”, meaning I promise to be genuine, I promise to try and ease the darkness around you, I promise to always try and never take you for granted,

BECAUSE  Love shouldn’t be a habit but a gift,  and from that moment, you should feel like you’re seeing the world through a fresh pair of eyes,

See, nowadays, “ I love you” can be heard around every corner, but very few people can keep that sacred promise;

You shouldn’t have to force the words out of that person, because when you finally hear them, it won’t feel like the natural order, on the contrary, you’ll feel the void slowly taking hold of you, and you’ll wake up with question marks everyday.

When a person tells you “ I love you” , it shouldn’t feel like a lie, it should feel as if you’re feeling  the warmth on your skin for the first time, as if you’re reading your favorite book for the first time…  pure bliss

And as time goes by, those  " I love you" will either be strenghten or will turn to  " I hate you " . There’s a thin layer between love and hate, now, it’s up to us to keep the balance on the right side

YOU can play with words as long as you want, but make sure that you mean every single one of them, and most importantly, bring them back to life, stage them, the words are already out there, you just have to follow the script, right?

« right »…
281 · Aug 2015
The way we weren't
Kelly N Aug 2015
Wherever I go, you're not there,
Each step gets harder
You're in the void
When I'm sad, When I'm happy, When I doubt, you're not there,
Soothing words will never replace your embrace
You're out there enjoying your life, while I'm stuck in our memories playing on repeat
There could never be an “ us”
You're not even in my dreams anymore,
Is this a sign ? My heart is slowly tearing into pieces
We are stuck in this endless vicious circle
But in the end, those five minutes of paradise were worth spending a year in the dark,
Because my dear, what's love without a little bit  of pain and sacrifice ?
250 · Apr 2017
The way to a girl's heart
Kelly N Apr 2017
It ain't that complicated, if only you would listen to her
Take honesty mix it with compassion, add a spoonful of romanticism
Let it cool for a few weeks
Then add the crucial ingredient CONSISTENCY, pour it as much as you want it
She's not asking for much, be true,  don't have her waiting by the phone
DON'T nourish fake promises
If you desire to see her, tell her so
If you're busy, if you're mind is elsewhere, TELL her
But don't leave her with empty bribes
249 · Sep 2015
Battle of Love
Kelly N Sep 2015
I fear the day when I  will no longer be in your heart,
When you will have move on with another sweetheart
She will make you forget all about me and unleash new butterflies,
You will blush and smile again,
You will swipe away what was left of your feelings for me in a heartbeat,
And my heart will feel empty, because you were the first one to fill it with the brighest colors,

I fear the day when I will no longer be able to see me through your eyes
237 · Jun 2015
Lost souls
Kelly N Jun 2015
Meet me under the willow weeping tree, where the lonely souls parade,

Would you help one of them before they all drown into oblivion?

In this world everything is seen through a dark lens, the sun is no longer present,

Ease the pain by whispering sweet words,

Let the light come back..

Can you picture this colorful world  that I have envisioned for them?
217 · Dec 2015
The price of truth
Kelly N Dec 2015
Truth does not come easy
It has been disguised in so many shapes
Yet I wasn't able to see it, even with the right glasses
Time made me pint point the cracks in my soul
Falling in love was supposed to be the cure of this bleakness
Feelings kept me away from this pain,

Or was it just another lie to keep you longer in my life?
I'm no longer looking for your love, I'm no longer trying to see myself through your eyes,
It's pitch black outside and my eyes are sore
I mourned our love all night long..
Yes I'll always remember you, and yes you'll always be my weakness

The pain is still there, but I have to move on, this time I have to see life through a colorful filter on my own

Two days has passed and everything reminds me of you, but I can hear the birds singing and I can feel the heat on my skin, I can feel this invisible embrace which shows me the path,

Taking a depth breath the unknown is waving at me
210 · Nov 2017
The vieil
Kelly N Nov 2017
She wears this veil so well
He won’t notice it’s there
Like a second skin, it has become attached to her

Hell, he hasn’t bothered peeling it off

Not even the edges
So, the flaws are still there, hiding under there
And like the others, he won’t get to know her

With a sigh of despair, she puts another layer
Praying for the day that she’ll be unveiled
209 · Oct 2015
Ocean of pain
Kelly N Oct 2015
Falling in our arms was as easy as reading my favorite book; it was quick and soothing.
You took me in a whole different universe
Hours became minutes and minutes became distant memories.
Because with you, time doesn’t stop -but flies away.
Consuming each minute as if it were our last , out of breath, out of love we are suffocating.

It is time to get apart again,water slowly fills the room, and I have nowhere to feel safe again, everything feels out of place.
My heartbeat is desperately trying to match yours, to reproduce the perfect harmony that once rhythmed our lives
In the end I wonder : would you be the one saving me from this ocean of pain or were you the one who filled it  in the first place?
184 · Jul 2016
Question mark
Kelly N Jul 2016
I have been looking for Love in dark places, filled with lies
Yet, I keep repeating the same mistakes
Will my stubborn broken heart ever learn from these failures?
Another day, reviving our memories, or at least what you tried to sell to me and to the other broken hearted girls

You left me there, breathless, at the top of the cliff trying to reach your heart, made it seem easy; but I just couldn’t see that it was merely a hologram, chasing the impossible, I opened some of my scars along the way

Now I’m left, in front a giant question mark, wondering what went through your head

You keep haunting me in my dreams, tell me, you selfish wizard, which spell shall I use to get you out of my system?

— The End —