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Curtis Sep 2014
Breathing is hard enough
Without this sickness
Holding me down
Curtis Jul 2016
I've been bit by the snake
Feeling the toxins enter my vain
Taking the path straight to my brain

My stomachs turning and turning
I'm in pain

Anxiety growing like a tree
Through nerve endings in my body

Brain like soil
Holding its roots

A skull like concrete
Begins to crack when they go too deep

Branches reach out and leaves grow from me
Casting a shadow onto my body
Curtis Aug 2014
What difference
Is the significance
Of the objects on display
Opposed to what I wear today
I don't know that anyone could say
Curtis Sep 2014
My meditation awaits
My not so silent escape
Into the strings that bounce in the air
Making sounds that flare
Curtis Apr 2014
Sleep come to thee
Take me away and whisper
Come with me

A place not so far
With rivers and forests
Crystal clear
A place where i have no scars

Clarity come to thee
Why cannot i see
I need to set myself free
While I'm awake in reality
Curtis Apr 2014
I am myself
I live free
I pity those
Who do not know themselves

All you see
Are the people you need
The people you use
To set your mind free

It is the sin of sloth
To only think of others
You are worth not your time
You know not time
You think for pain
And ask what you have gained
Nothing

You need yourself
To be set free
To see others
Whom they really be

I was there
But my mind has been cleared
I have lost all my fears
And become a deer

Dear,
You will be there
And I'll be here
Come to me
When you're free
Curtis Apr 2016
Someone pulled the trigger
On the slow motion gun
I feel the motion of the mechanisms
I appreciate their beauty
Just long enough
Until the gunpowder erupts

Forced down the barrel
Twisting in intense heat
I see the world spin
As into it im released
So
Curtis Sep 2014
So
So
This is life
So
Watch me flow!
Curtis Jun 2016
An old fire
Reduced to embers
Dark clouds
And a storm ahead

She came back to me
Arms filled with wood
A heart filled with love
A head aching with guilt

I have this fire to rebuild
And this storm to weather
But I can do it now
Because we're together
Curtis Jun 2016
"Maybe this world just isn't right for me."
I say as I think that could never be
"Maybe if I cut this silver chord,
No no... I'd just find myself,
In another place,
Just as bored."

"Maybe I'd be just a bit less lonely,
Maybe I could finally focus,
And do what the others do and make money,
But I doubt that will ever sound fun to me."

"Maybe then I could be an artist,
But then again why can I not tomorrow."
Sometimes it seems I'm destined for sorrow.
Curtis Jul 2016
I've been around the sun
More times than I have fingers and toes
I've experienced the beauty of spring
The heat of summer
The calm of fall
And the stillness of winter

Altering the small chunk of earth that I occupy
Slowly building it higher
Complimented by times of digging it down
Constantly moving from states of progression
To times of regression

This time
I leave you behind
I build up the earth
And strengthen the mind
Curtis May 2014
Creativity is overwhelming me
Why now!
I must sleep

I want to play and write and think!
I do not want to sink
Sink into my dreams tonight
Only to be awake before mornings light!

There need not be such a schedule!
To think twenty-four is to be a fool
Why waste this spark!
Why must I sleep in the dark
Curtis Jul 2016
And yet
My hand is outstretched
Knowing I'll touch nothing
But darkness

I will give anything
To see it again
To see the way
You light up the dark
Curtis Nov 2014
As above
So below
They say

Looking up
Is looking down
In a way

But being down
Finds a place
Where only you play

Heaven above
Hell below
Theres a border

Waist not
Your time
It's sacred

It's divine
Curtis Sep 2014
Everything you see today,
Is the creation of one.
Not of god,
Nor the sun,
But the universe
And all the lights sum.
Curtis Oct 2016
I
Don't
Know
****
Curtis Jun 2014
Where did you go?
I miss your soul...
Curtis Aug 2014
Isn't it sad
When someone falls
And they get mad

Turning to blame
Anyone but themselves
Is to me a shame

When we fall
We learn
And can again stand tall
Unless we choose
To think we know it all
Curtis Jan 2017
There's nothing like the stillness of night
To bring balance to my body and soul
The moon glows with radiant waves

I stand in adoration
Out in the cold

The snow falls into my feet
With the sound of windchimes
Making music of the street
Curtis Apr 2016
No amount of wind,
Noise on the freeway,
Raindrops on my head,
Lights in the houses,
Could change how still this night is.
Curtis Jul 2015
Its hard to move forward
When i dont know
Where forward is

So worried
Always
That i may misplace a step
Sometimes
I forget to take one
Curtis Sep 2016
The world
Right here
Sits so close
To the next
Maybe we can't see it
Maybe to some it doesn't exist
To some neither this world does
And neither does the next
But like a lover
The good ones with their hands out stretched
Be careful
The hand you hold
May be no lover
Curtis Sep 2014
What is life
Why is me
Why live to see tomorrow
When all this time is just to borrow
Why can't we be
Why is there something wrong with me
I just let my problems be
It is what makes me
Me
Life would be better if i did not breathe
Others would life a life with ease
What is it that you smoke
My mother told me to stay away from dope
I think I will take a ****
Lifes a mess and it's just broke
I'll listen to music and every sad solemn note
All the burden and pain I have to tote
No beauty have these hands ever wrote
What is life
Why is me
Well wait a second
Can I not just be
I wish I were some source of energy
Who can live and love and certainly see
I think that is who I am meant to be
This thing we smoke
It is just a plant?
Why then do they tell me i can't
What else exists that I have not tried
Don't do these shrooms your brain will fry
Don't mind if i give em a try


Hey well now i know why
I'm just a normal guy
And now I have some reasons why
Life is full of things to try
As I float amongst my day
It seems alot less work and alot more play
With not a need to bow or pray
Curtis Sep 2014
i have got stress all up in the mind
no appreciation of my own art do i find
i cant rest i havent got the time
i need to organize some rhymes
 \m     \     \          /  l  /_ _ _
   \      n\o   \      /  r  / \ o   /  d /
     \i       \  v \  /     / _ _\  / a  /
       \      d\   e\    /
Curtis Aug 2014
The word to describe
The beauty behind your eyes
Has to be stunning
Curtis Apr 2014
The subtlety of hints
My door cracked
Only about three inch
An object on the floor
One that was not there before
A drape pried open
A little fur left on the curtain
Curtis May 2014
So suddenly
It was no longer
No longer about me
None of my personal griefs
None of my self pity
Not about thee
It was about he
Or she
Whom lay so selflessly
There
For me to see

A bird lay
In the lawn
MY lawn
Nearing to be gone
For it would have never seen dawn
As the cats play
And look for prey
I would not let it be gone to they
It is times like this
That make a godless man
Wish to pray
Sun
Curtis Apr 2014
Sun
Oh sun you shine so bright
On my face and into my life
Spring is here and is a friend so dear
Until winter comes and chills my beard

**** winter.
Sun
Curtis Apr 2014
Sun
You need not worry
What another thinks
For you're but a sun
Shining light
each poem a ray
For those who find it
Glory such a day
But you must maintain your great waves
Curtis Apr 2014
There need only be
One ever so warming fire,
The sun that shines down on me.
One ever so giving earth,
The ring of life that surrounds me.
One ever so cleansing water,
The cars passing that resemble falls.
One ever so friendly wind,
The one thats keeping me company.
I'm missing water
Curtis Apr 2014
Ahh the feeling
A buzz on a sunday evening
The wind somewhat chilling
For the stairs
I willl surely need a railing
Curtis Jul 2016
Something about the energy tonight is right
As if my mind tonight has given up its fight
And chose to exist in harmonious trinity
Bringing a feeling like white light

On this day today
I am a sun
Sending rays of a feeling to you
To brighten a possible bitter mood

I'm reaching my hands toward the dark
Lighting them with my spark
Lighting them with all I am
And with all I have

It brings me joy to see
Another smile when they see me
I ask of you now
Exist in creativity

Unique is the structure of every mind
But without light we would all be blind
Take a moment to stare into a sun
And understand it isn't the only one
Curtis Jul 2016
Thoughts last night I would rather not repeat
Lead me to dreams I still remember from my sleep

Places from when I was a boy
Surrounded by my childhood toys

Alone in my room as I once was
Alone in my room as I still am

The sun shines through the window
I can feel the moment as I watch everything glow
Curtis Aug 2014
A sour day
Turns sweet
With every wonderful person
That I meet
Curtis Apr 2016
what a joy
to this body

holding so heavily
steel in my hands

elongated
properly weighted

sharp edges
that could cut
the very essence
of reality
Curtis May 2014
To stare into the craters of the moon
Is a reminder that we will be returned soon
To the grips of a black holes' tomb
And this, brings the furthest feeling from gloom
From death something new will always bloom
Curtis Oct 2014
Mind blank
Body numb
Eyes sore
Ears ringing
Clogged nose
Burnt tongue

Just one of those days
Curtis Sep 2014
Writing
Is the only way
For me to stay sane
Curtis Oct 2014
I'm done!
I give up!
I give in!
I'm ready now,
For new life to begin!
Curtis May 2014
The things you do
What they do
For whom they do
From where did it come?
If the answer is anything less then your soul
You know not how to be whole
Curtis May 2014
There's a story I know
A story of a man
Who lived on hill
Lonely now
Still a ring on his hand

He picked up the paper
On an oh so perfect morning
"What a tragedy,
For his death by his own hand,
No one should be mourning."

The life of a boy
Whos age means none
Had been taken away
By his own gun

"What a foolish thing,
The thought would never cross my mind,
To let something so irrelevant leave such a sting,
Gods got a plan,
All in due time."

So he moved on
To the section he loved
The one with the questions
And the blanks in lines
Only to be interrupted
By an irrelevant fly

"What a pest,
You dare cross my eye,
Ill have you know,
You're now sure to die."

The paper he held
It the form of a field
Now a bat
With the tremendous speed it yield

"Now where did you go,
You annoyance you,
I swear I just saw you,
Not but a mere moment ago."

Once again
The fly caught his eye
And he let out a scream
"It is you i will best,
Why even try!"

He swung and he swung
With force like thunder
Twas the tiny flys blood
For which he hungered

"It seems it so,
That I have lost you again,
With a bit of whiskey,
You'll certainly show."

Into the kitchen
And into the cabinet
He pulled out a glass
And continued to slam it
On the bare counter
Where his whiskey silently stared

"Who could resist,
Such a sweet smell,
Ahh the smell of bourben,
And it's not even twelve."

Just as he took
His first big sip
He was certain he felt
Something land on his lip

"Oh I have got you now,
Goodbye you **** fly."

He took up his bat
Swung he did
His face now red
Covered with a frown
He saw no fly
Nothing dead on the ground

"Fine,
I'll just sit here,
Sit here in my chair,
And you feel free to come near."

And to his face
He brought a bottle
Liquid and golden
With nothing but anger
Growing
And growing

"Ahh,
Is that you that I hear?
You hope to die,
If youre so close to my ear."

He swung his bat
But one last time
But what he hit
Was no fly
He hit the ground
And began a ****** pool
It looks as though
A simple wasp
Played him a fool

Startled he fell
Back still against his chair
The wasp
Never even touched a hair

And once again
A lonely old man
Will look at the paper
And see the story of the fool
With death at his own hand
Curtis Sep 2014
Earth
The brain
To the body
Of the universe
If only
We could escape
The deathly grasps
Of the thoughts among our mind
Curtis Apr 2016
From the stars in the sky
Through the atmosphere
To all the tall trees
That grasp the ground

The ground that holds our feet
And gently holds the sea
Down very far underneath
Layers of rock and molten lava streams

Down to the very core
That twists and turns
Its own heated center
The Earth is alive
Curtis Sep 2014
The life it give
The life it took
From all beginnings
The Earth been shook
When one answers
With a book

Void of poison
Inside is where
We look
Curtis May 2016
Pasts come alive
Futures die

Lost in limbo

Reaching out to see
The markers on the trees
Where's the path gone
I left it to be free

Through a forest in perpetual night
Creatures all around
But none in my sight
No tools
No weapons
No light
No chance of a fair fight

This path I have chosen
Is now my home
I must build some shelter
Some fire and soon
I'll see the sun
A light in the forest
Brighter than the moon
Curtis Aug 2014
So now
The line we walk along
Becomes clear again
Always clear
Again

I can see it below me
Always there
Never to not be
The sight grows old
I make it blurry
To somehow feel bold

The line we walk along
My focus no more
I look everywhere
But the floor
Curtis Apr 2015
The moon tells us when its night
And tells me its alright

Holding on to earth so tight
To see its vibrant light
Curtis Feb 2016
This love I cannot give,
Is overflowing.
Please,
Take some from me.

I can't help it.
Every so often,
Once on a blue moon,
These thoughts filter through.

I don't sleep,
I think of you.
I won't wait, for anyone, but you sometimes steal some sleep.
Curtis Apr 2016
I really miss you
I mean your body
And i think your soul too

What is a soul exactly
I often wonder and think i may know
But i dont
I have far yet to grow

Is it a place, much like here
Where i leave a bit of me
Every so often
So that something stay behind
If i were to ever die

Or a more catholic approach
On saying its all that i am
And i must be what i am
And hope to be what i am
Again
In a better place
Curtis Oct 2014
Four tonight
just us four
we will drink
and drink more!

Hot tubs
Fires
strangers
And alcohol galore!

We partied
with more
than what was
bargained for!

Some kid
passed out
stretched across
A bathroom floor!

'Hey man
I have pills
happy pills
watch me take more!'

Surprised
i was capable
of traversing
The yard to the door!
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