My grandmother always used to tell me that July was the best month for a wedding. It was the only month you could count on to not have rain. And she was right, as long as I can remember, not once have I seen rain in July.
It did rain however, that last Wednesday in May you still looked at me like I had stardust in my hair and the amazon river in my eyes. And it also rained, that Thursday in June, when I wrote you the last of many letters I never sent you. And now I'm 2,000 miles from you realizing that even when I was still in the same zipcode, we were galaxies apart. I was stuck on a planet with a very stable climate of a constant downpour, and I don't know where you were, but I do know that it was nowhere near me.

And today marks 30 days I've been dead in the water, calling your name and hoping that wind really never does die. I still don't know much but it has to mean something that it's July and it hasn't stopped raining.

You don't know who I am,
But **** I know who you are.

You're the girl that puts the sun to shame when you smile.

You're the girl that thinks fireworks are pretty, but **** they don't have anything on the light in your eyes.

You're the girl that laughs when the rain hits your face.

You're the girl that said hello, and I'm the girl that was too shy to say it back.

You don't know who I am, but you're the girl who stole my heart.

I love you
not because
you're good looking

I love you
not because
you're caring

I love you
not because
you dote on me

I love you
not because
your smiles are sweet

I love you
not in lust
of your crevice
or orifice
or skin

I love you
because
without you
I feel

incomplete within.

As she laughed I was aware of becoming involved
in her laughter and being part of it, until her
teeth were only accidental stars with a talent
for squad-drill. I was drawn in by short gasps,
inhaled at each momentary recovery, lost finally
in the dark caverns of her throat, bruised by
the ripple of unseen muscles. An elderly waiter
with trembling hands was hurriedly spreading a
pink and white checked cloth over the rusty
green  iron table, saying: ‘If the lady and
gentleman wish to take their tea in the garden,
if the lady and gentleman wish to take their tea
in the garden…’ I decided that if the shaking
of her ******* could be stopped, some of the
fragments of the afternoon might be collected,
and I concentrated my attention with careful
subtlety to this end.

Green arsenic smeared on an egg-white cloth,
Crushed strawberries! Come, let us feast our eyes.

I stare into the darkness of the room, tears running down my face.
Silence.
Nothing comes to mind but you.
You
You
You
******.
Why cant i forget about you?
Why wont my heart let you go?
******.
I wish this wasnt so hard.
You got over me in an instant,
Why cant i get over you?
******.