Let me raise hell


                                          until its fire consumes me.

Fall: A double meaning. It was only autumn, and I was already head over heels for you.

Peace: We walked to the park in those crisp, ever-shortening nights to get high and hold hands. The journey back was always so much more beautiful.

Lust: I gave myself wholly to you, trusting you to be gentle with my scars. Being naked in front of someone else had always been a terrifying thought; being naked with you made me feel safe.

Distance: We spent less and less time together. You still loved me down and tried to convince me it was as real as it was in the beginning, but I felt myself slipping into the rift.

Distress: You said we needed a break, so you could work on yourself and learn how to show me love again.
                      You are right, but I still feel empty.

I heard demons harmonizing in song today,
But I’m still unsure if 21 will ever find me.
Maybe if two evils can make a good, though,
I can cancel myself out and finally
Find my peace among the stars

I’ve held you up in your weakest state
And you repay me by kicking me to the ground
Swiping at my chest with nails painted poison
Until I’m left coughing up bits of broken heart on the floor

Now here we are again
A new face, a new name
Same poisonous fingers
Same icy veins

But I will rise from the ashes you tried to cage me in
The doubts you threw in with me
And prove to myself yet again
That in the end I will be my only friend

I am trapped
Halfway to heaven, infinites upon infinities disguised as stars.

I just want to feel like I’m more than the dark and empty space between them.