the scars that circle my wrist,
once beaded with blood,
but now running around
my arm, standing out like
pink ribbons against my skin,
waiting, hoping, against me
that someone will see them
and they'll ask the dreaded
question that sets off a
sinking feeling in the pit
of my stomach

They don't believe me.
They don't trust me.
They don't listen.
They think that it's all in my head...
and even if it is,
they're not feeling what I feel.
They don't know,
so how could they possibly help.

My mind is racing
My pulse is slowing
My vision is darkening
I'm finally dreaming
Finally asleep
After so many days just laying there
Alone with too many thoughts
I feel numb and full of pain
I feel myself forever slipping away

When you think what you see
Is wrong and not meant to be
When you think what you feel
Is wrong and done stupidly
When you think your hair
Is not the way its supposed to be
When you think your eyes
Are the wrong shape making you funny
When you look at your skin
And question its color
When someone calls you one thing
But you know youre another
When someone calls you an other
And you know it hurts
When youre in a room
And you feel like youre alone
When you apply for a job
And know why youre ignored
When you try and find your place
But find theres no place for you

I long for the I can smile
I long for the day I can laugh
I long for the day I can breathe
I long for the day that I'm free

I need to know you miss me
I need to know you still care
I need to see your feelings
You need to break that wall
That you hide behind so well
Almost 3 years
Gone just like that
Baby girl can't you tell
I'm living a personal hell
You told me I was beautiful
You told me I was yours
You told me many things
I could never believe from someone else
Losing you meant losing part of me
I have a hole in my heart
Where you used to be
I need to see you still love me
I need to see that you miss when I held you
I need to see I need to feel
I need your arms around me
I need your lips on mine
I need you sleeping next to me
I haven't slept in days
I'm too afraid
When I sleep I dream
And it only kills me more
We lay in bed and you fall asleep in my arms
I kiss your head and hold you close while you dream
I whisper that I love you
That one day you'll be my wife
I just wake up all alone
I'm pouring my heart out
I'm trying to make you see
You're the love of my life
It might be cliche
Baby you are the only one for me