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I WAS born on the prairie and the milk of its wheat, the red of its clover, the eyes of its women, gave me a song and a slogan.

Here the water went down, the icebergs slid with gravel, the gaps and the valleys hissed, and the black loam came, and the yellow sandy loam.
Here between the sheds of the Rocky Mountains and the Appalachians, here now a morning star fixes a fire sign over the timber claims and cow pastures, the corn belt, the cotton belt, the cattle ranches.
Here the gray geese go five hundred miles and back with a wind under their wings honking the cry for a new home.
Here I know I will hanker after nothing so much as one more sunrise or a sky moon of fire doubled to a river moon of water.

The prairie sings to me in the forenoon and I know in the night I rest easy in the prairie arms, on the prairie heart..    .    .
        After the sunburn of the day
        handling a pitchfork at a hayrack,
        after the eggs and biscuit and coffee,
        the pearl-gray haystacks
        in the gloaming
        are cool prayers
        to the harvest hands.

In the city among the walls the overland passenger train is choked and the pistons hiss and the wheels curse.
On the prairie the overland flits on phantom wheels and the sky and the soil between them muffle the pistons and cheer the wheels..    .    .
I am here when the cities are gone.
I am here before the cities come.
I nourished the lonely men on horses.
I will keep the laughing men who ride iron.
I am dust of men.

The running water babbled to the deer, the cottontail, the gopher.
You came in wagons, making streets and schools,
Kin of the ax and rifle, kin of the plow and horse,
Singing Yankee Doodle, Old Dan Tucker, Turkey in the Straw,
You in the coonskin cap at a log house door hearing a lone wolf howl,
You at a sod house door reading the blizzards and chinooks let loose from Medicine Hat,
I am dust of your dust, as I am brother and mother
To the copper faces, the worker in flint and clay,
The singing women and their sons a thousand years ago
Marching single file the timber and the plain.

I hold the dust of these amid changing stars.
I last while old wars are fought, while peace broods mother-like,
While new wars arise and the fresh killings of young men.
I fed the boys who went to France in great dark days.
Appomattox is a beautiful word to me and so is Valley Forge and the Marne and Verdun,
I who have seen the red births and the red deaths
Of sons and daughters, I take peace or war, I say nothing and wait.

Have you seen a red sunset drip over one of my cornfields, the shore of night stars, the wave lines of dawn up a wheat valley?
Have you heard my threshing crews yelling in the chaff of a strawpile and the running wheat of the wagonboards, my cornhuskers, my harvest hands hauling crops, singing dreams of women, worlds, horizons?.    .    .
        Rivers cut a path on flat lands.
        The mountains stand up.
        The salt oceans press in
        And push on the coast lines.
        The sun, the wind, bring rain
        And I know what the rainbow writes across the east or west in a half-circle:
        A love-letter pledge to come again..    .    .
      Towns on the Soo Line,
      Towns on the Big Muddy,
      Laugh at each other for cubs
      And tease as children.

Omaha and Kansas City, Minneapolis and St. Paul, sisters in a house together, throwing slang, growing up.
Towns in the Ozarks, Dakota wheat towns, Wichita, Peoria, Buffalo, sisters throwing slang, growing up..    .    .
Out of prairie-brown grass crossed with a streamer of wigwam smoke-out of a smoke pillar, a blue promise-out of wild ducks woven in greens and purples-
Here I saw a city rise and say to the peoples round world: Listen, I am strong, I know what I want.
Out of log houses and stumps-canoes stripped from tree-sides-flatboats coaxed with an ax from the timber claims-in the years when the red and the white men met-the houses and streets rose.

A thousand red men cried and went away to new places for corn and women: a million white men came and put up skyscrapers, threw out rails and wires, feelers to the salt sea: now the smokestacks bite the skyline with stub teeth.

In an early year the call of a wild duck woven in greens and purples: now the riveter's chatter, the police patrol, the song-whistle of the steamboat.

To a man across a thousand years I offer a handshake.
I say to him: Brother, make the story short, for the stretch of a thousand years is short..    .    .
What brothers these in the dark?
What eaves of skyscrapers against a smoke moon?
These chimneys shaking on the lumber shanties
When the coal boats plow by on the river-
The hunched shoulders of the grain elevators-
The flame sprockets of the sheet steel mills
And the men in the rolling mills with their shirts off
Playing their flesh arms against the twisting wrists of steel:
        what brothers these
        in the dark
        of a thousand years?.    .    .
A headlight searches a snowstorm.
A funnel of white light shoots from over the pilot of the Pioneer Limited crossing Wisconsin.

In the morning hours, in the dawn,
The sun puts out the stars of the sky
And the headlight of the Limited train.

The fireman waves his hand to a country school teacher on a bobsled.
A boy, yellow hair, red scarf and mittens, on the bobsled, in his lunch box a pork chop sandwich and a V of gooseberry pie.

The horses fathom a snow to their knees.
Snow hats are on the rolling prairie hills.
The Mississippi bluffs wear snow hats..    .    .
Keep your hogs on changing corn and mashes of grain,
    O farmerman.
    Cram their insides till they waddle on short legs
    Under the drums of bellies, hams of fat.
    **** your hogs with a knife slit under the ear.
    Hack them with cleavers.
    Hang them with hooks in the hind legs..    .    .
A wagonload of radishes on a summer morning.
Sprinkles of dew on the crimson-purple *****.
The farmer on the seat dangles the reins on the rumps of dapple-gray horses.
The farmer's daughter with a basket of eggs dreams of a new hat to wear to the county fair..    .    .
On the left-and right-hand side of the road,
        Marching corn-
I saw it knee high weeks ago-now it is head high-tassels of red silk creep at the ends of the ears..    .    .
I am the prairie, mother of men, waiting.
They are mine, the threshing crews eating beefsteak, the farmboys driving steers to the railroad cattle pens.
They are mine, the crowds of people at a Fourth of July basket picnic, listening to a lawyer read the Declaration of Independence, watching the pinwheels and Roman candles at night, the young men and women two by two hunting the bypaths and kissing bridges.
They are mine, the horses looking over a fence in the frost of late October saying good-morning to the horses hauling wagons of rutabaga to market.
They are mine, the old zigzag rail fences, the new barb wire..    .    .
The cornhuskers wear leather on their hands.
There is no let-up to the wind.
Blue bandannas are knotted at the ruddy chins.

Falltime and winter apples take on the smolder of the five-o'clock November sunset: falltime, leaves, bonfires, stubble, the old things go, and the earth is grizzled.
The land and the people hold memories, even among the anthills and the angleworms, among the toads and woodroaches-among gravestone writings rubbed out by the rain-they keep old things that never grow old.

The frost loosens corn husks.
The Sun, the rain, the wind
        loosen corn husks.
The men and women are helpers.
They are all cornhuskers together.
I see them late in the western evening
        in a smoke-red dust..    .    .
The phantom of a yellow rooster flaunting a scarlet comb, on top of a dung pile crying hallelujah to the streaks of daylight,
The phantom of an old hunting dog nosing in the underbrush for muskrats, barking at a **** in a treetop at midnight, chewing a bone, chasing his tail round a corncrib,
The phantom of an old workhorse taking the steel point of a plow across a forty-acre field in spring, hitched to a harrow in summer, hitched to a wagon among cornshocks in fall,
These phantoms come into the talk and wonder of people on the front porch of a farmhouse late summer nights.
"The shapes that are gone are here," said an old man with a cob pipe in his teeth one night in Kansas with a hot wind on the alfalfa..    .    .
Look at six eggs
In a mockingbird's nest.

Listen to six mockingbirds
Flinging follies of O-be-joyful
Over the marshes and uplands.

Look at songs
Hidden in eggs..    .    .
When the morning sun is on the trumpet-vine blossoms, sing at the kitchen pans: Shout All Over God's Heaven.
When the rain slants on the potato hills and the sun plays a silver shaft on the last shower, sing to the bush at the backyard fence: Mighty Lak a Rose.
When the icy sleet pounds on the storm windows and the house lifts to a great breath, sing for the outside hills: The Ole Sheep Done Know the Road, the Young Lambs Must Find the Way..    .    .
Spring slips back with a girl face calling always: "Any new songs for me? Any new songs?"

O prairie girl, be lonely, singing, dreaming, waiting-your lover comes-your child comes-the years creep with toes of April rain on new-turned sod.
O prairie girl, whoever leaves you only crimson poppies to talk with, whoever puts a good-by kiss on your lips and never comes back-
There is a song deep as the falltime redhaws, long as the layer of black loam we go to, the shine of the morning star over the corn belt, the wave line of dawn up a wheat valley..    .    .
O prairie mother, I am one of your boys.
I have loved the prairie as a man with a heart shot full of pain over love.
Here I know I will hanker after nothing so much as one more sunrise or a sky moon of fire doubled to a river moon of water..    .    .
I speak of new cities and new people.
I tell you the past is a bucket of ashes.
I tell you yesterday is a wind gone down,
  a sun dropped in the west.
I tell you there is nothing in the world
  only an ocean of to-morrows,
  a sky of to-morrows.

I am a brother of the cornhuskers who say
  at sundown:
        To-morrow is a day.
Andrew Parker Nov 2017
Written on 11/20/2017

That awkward moment when someone flirts with you on a dating app and says "I like that you look masculine."

You see,
I never saw masculinity as a part of me.

My identity was always flamboyant,
wearing pink shirts and sashes,
crop tops with styling gelled eyelashes,
sparkling headbands and dazzling bandannas,
snapback hats featuring giant bananas,
I dressed with the raging flamboyance of flamingos!
Sporting a certain type of femininity that only a gay man knows.

All the trimming and cutting, and shaving and nairing,
for hours,
as time and body hair intertwined in the showers,
washed masculinity off my body down the drain,
Experienced electrolysis burns, but the pain
had infected my thoughts,
like each hair is unnatural.  

Purge it all,
Scorch and torch it all,
Leave nothing at all!
No trace
of evolution's flawed attempt to grace
me with an adaptive advantage to take on the world's harsh climate.  
I admit,
this hair entangles me and strangles me,
it also oozes out of me like pimples from a pore,
a ***** to testosterone,
poor me - a victim of nature's masculinity.
What a hairy situation I've gotten myself in.

--

Femininity.
Its bestowed upon me by society.
When I sashay or say hey gurl hey,
society recognizes these things as girly and gay,
not a very masculine way to walk or talk.  

Stereotypes about *** and gender are so easily manipulated.
Like a circus performer on the tight rope,
the suspense keeps people wondering where will I fall?

But hold me under a microscope and you will see it all,
a million molecules that makeup my femininity.
I wear skinny jeans and tank tops,
then get complimented on them by dude bros,
like yo that's tight- where'd you get it boss?

I bought it in the girl's section at Ross.

My toe nails painted and displayed for public view,
flip flops emboldened with matching turquoise hues,
Femininity is worn on me like a fabulous armor plate.

--

Fast forward to a fateful date during No-Shave November.
I remember,
growing out my ****** hair for the very first time,
I wore it like a mask,
portraying a fictional character who was masc-uline.
Bathing in manliness at this masquerade.
It was through this charade,
that I grew
... temporary happiness for me from all of you.

The compliments they poured in.
My once smooth canvas of a face,
waiting to be crafted into the Mona Lisa,
had been turned into an artistic masterpiece,
'Gay Man with Amnesia',
of who he used to be.
A painting of someone society wanted,
someone whose masculinity was outwardly flaunted.
But inside, I felt taunted,
each time they complimented
me and my newfound masculinity.

--

Then, it happened on Grindr,
a gay dating app.
This masculine mishap.

A stranger's message read, "I like that you look masculine."
It sounded even stranger in my head.
Their profile description read,

"Masc 4 Masc
Masculine man seeking other masculine men to hangout with."

That's when I felt it.
My mask had made me masc.

This particularly manic morning brought me to ask
myself in the bathroom mirror,
"Who the hell am I looking at?"

In sheer terror, I teared-up,
scanned the portrait of 'Gay Man with Amnesia',
and then decided to tear it up!

I grabbed my electric razor,
grum grum grummm
as these blades grazed my face and chin,
I was offered sweet, soft, porcelain skin - my absolution.

pause

heh heh
When I came to and snapped out of the amnesia,
eager to see results of this restorative procedure,
the mirror was fogged with steam and slop.

I tried logging in to my laptop's webcam,  
for naught.  
The ****** recognition feature -- didn't recognize me
... but finally, I did.

Once again, I see the man behind the masc-ulinity.
Samantha Steele Sep 2013
Bandannas,
They were our thing once.

We would gift them to each other,
to help us cope with being
alone

I have one
and it still smells like memories
cigarettes, ***, your home.
but its fading

The other one smells like you
And I hold it to me when im sad
                                                 or mad
                                                      or scared
                                                          ­or just numb.
Liam Williams Apr 2012
Knicks

Waiting at the bus stop,
Jamming to some hip hop,
Checkin’ on my wrist watch
Clock is running tick-tock

And he made his way down the block
Walking in my direction,
With his face hanging behind that faded fitted

He is the boy that never goes home
Who thinks selling dope and
having high hopes makes him grown

Late nights on street corners,
Protecting urban borders,
Claiming blocks for blood,
selling rocks for what?

He nodded at me and I smiled back
not ever ignoring the bloodstains on his shoe laces
He was a gangster

And I never understood how such a bright boy
could be such a coward
Because that’s what they are all
Cowards who hide behind colors
Blue and red tied brothers
who leave their sisters and mothers
How could you?

Whose familiar face standing beside me
As if we never shared the same last name
Cameron

For all those times that you pushed me from the doorway
Just to kiss the sunset with your piff

I prayed for your protection
I prayed that you would never forget
mommies’ and daddies’ lesson
and that my love for you will never lessen

And I prayed that a bullet will never befriend your skin, I prayed
That someday you will understand
that being a brave street soldier in the dark
still made you a coward come sunrise

And sometime I feel that you may be color blind
Because I do not understand how you see strength
in your blacks and reds
When you have blacks and blues tattooed all over you.

So tell me what side do you belong to
when your lips are synced supo....
but your eyes are swimming in cripped colored kisses
mixed with hints sdfnarega...
ajrngjeag...

They got you
now you have an appetite for revenge

too proud to bleed for the bullet
yet quick to let finger tips lit triggers
your fine arms are too short to box with God

I remember when you told me
that you favorite rapper was TuPac
and I bet you wonder if heaven has got a ghetto

but you will never know because attempting to play God
and pimping mother nature
will never get you high enough to get there

so he will just send his angels down to tell you
that it is TuPac for one more gangster

and now you are off to hell’s home, homie
where you won’t have back pocket
for your blood colored bandannas to hold on to
like umbilical cords connecting you to the wind
you will just be dead skin
lost like the next of kin
of all your other blood brothers who sin

and all your fighting for meaning nothing any more
because in hell you will no longer
have your boys willing to die for you

just demons waiting to dance with you
holding out red roses that used to be white
before they used them to clean the messes
you made when you were still alive
what are you thinking?

you coward
running from your own light
shaking hands with the darkness
as if you were never taught to recognize the sun
mommie’s son
my brother

I just wanted to make you come home
make you breakfast in the morning
and remind you how beautiful blood can be
when it is not used as paint on concrete canvases
but when it is served aeruhgiureg on kitchen tables..

and as my bus pulls up,
I rummage through my pockets for my dollar
wishing I too had a faded fitting to hide my face beneath
because I would hate for you to see me cry for you too

and as I step onto that bus and walk over to my seat
I silently pray to God
that he will forgive me for calling you a coward

because who am I to call you a coward
when I couldn’t even find the strength to tell you how I felt
couldn’t share my quick healed cuts with you
and the tears that raced down my cheeks

so fast to prove that blood is indeed thicker than water
My brother

you stayed at the bus stop as we drove away
and I don’t know if my bus wasn’t going in your direction
or if you just lost your direction
years ago in the red silk lining of papi’s coffin

but I won’t dwell
I will sleep tonight
not forget to dedicate my prayers to you.

Wake up in the morning,
get dressed and
if you find yourself missing your little sister
I will just be...

Waiting at the bus stop,
Jamming to some hip hop,
Checkin’ on my wrist watch
Clock is running tick-tock
fallen sun rays
a yellow ballet
as her feet hit the pavement
raw soles against hard concrete
the slight scratch to send shivers
that follows each step
calluses forming
healed by the heat

flowers he had picked
reflect white next to chocolate hair
the bokeh golden light
turns muddy eyes emerald
as she looks with despair and excitement
upon his crooked teeth
and tousled hair

hands held hands in rough embrace
and yellow and red bandannas
hold sliding fingers together
graphite tattoos and cotton words
engraved on fair skin
bleeding ankles
and scarred knees
the collection of their mementos

fringe tickles eyes
a curtain of weeds
of rough fallen doors
as smooth finger pads touch soft cheekbones
and for once they close their eyes
to see fireworks
Joshua Haines Jun 2017
It's emergence so brief and shattering,
you'd have to question it's existence.
****** from the swamp by the sky,
it is devoid of morality; it is the terror
that does not forgive what it hasn't
given permission to.

Abrupt hum of an Indian motorcycle,
streaking across the starving freeway,
leaving ribbons of red, in the long,
uncomfortably volcanic-black night.

The body on the machine is wrapped
in cheap, crimson leather, and topped
by a navy helmet, stamped by a
visor reflecting rushed stars.

Migraine-inducing headlights hit
it's prop-store-green body, as it
drips and steps towards a vintage
orange van. Through the videotape
windshield, it can see two still figures;
two figures with aviators and bandannas.

Road signs swing by; the air zipping
in and out of the helmet. The body,
effortlessly, weaves through and
past the few vehicles lost in the dark.

Decelerating, the Indian penetrates
an exit stained: 567-TX-155.

Inside the carpet lined cave,
the figures stare at the monster,
indifferent to it's existence -- well,
not entirely one reminds the other.
It's arms dance in front of it's eyes,
blinded by the freshly clicked
high-beams; unaware that they
are, slowly, stepping closer.

Approaching a skeletal forearm,
emulating a tree, the Indian gradually
becomes silent. The body walks it
behind the rooted elbow, laying it
on a web of wooded earth; pulling
up a sleeve, removing and resting
a watch on the hot, metallic carcass.

It removes it's scattering fingers,
green and twitching, from it's
shrub framed eyes. Looking
forward, two bottles of blackness
grow near. It is a miracle only
surpassed by the instability of
life, that I look upon you, one
bellows. Consider this not
personal, but a preemptive
admonishment. Simply: I
cannot allow you to live,
for I have heard what I
cannot understand. Please
know that I admire,
thus I destroy.

The leather-clad foot-claps
eat and spit the sleeping gravel.
Pace becomes quicker; frenzied,
even. Like a comet, exact in its
imprecision, the navy helmet
falls to the ground, capturing
a night-sky goodbye; casting
the moon, briefly, into her eye.
So brief you'd have to
question its existence.

It's body, pulpy and beet red,
lodges itself between their
pale, freckled fingers. They
consume, pause, then continue
to gnash on the foreign meat.

Yellow, like an ancient bone,
the moon curves and bends
with ever chomp. It can feel
it all. The insides, pulled and
wrapped around wrists; soon
yanking; soon gritty removal.
The light begins to blend
with the surrounding dark.
Last breath, ruined by the
brief choking it's flesh caused.
So brief you'd have to
question it's existence.  

Sweat rips down from her
hair, onto her eyelids. A
dead sprint is broken into,
before she throws herself
into woods, avoiding the
approaching beams of a
vehicle. Forty-three
seconds imitate the
vehicle and go by. She
lifts her eyes to the brim
of a bush; pupils sliding
side-to-side.

Van tires make the transition
from gravel to asphalt, as the
two figures are now, indifferently,
drenched in a red-bronze, becoming
crust around their lips. The driver
says, My father told me about him --
that. He said, if given life, it would
learn to take it. You cannot change
the nature of a monster. If we
remove it, we remove death.
We control the consent.

Her heels transform her sprint
into a statue's posture. The rocks
hurt her knees, as her hands soon
follow, crashing to the ground.
Scattering fingers reach towards
her, soon met by her petite grasp.
The same fingers grow still.

She reaches towards her side,
cradling the nickle handle of
The Last Killer
looking behind her, anger and
a plan, running down her face.
Santiago May 2015
Just business
That's all it is
Y las puertas del infierno
Is who you working with
See that corpse
It's been reanimated
It's under my control
Young trucos the greatest
Money gangs
Are all around
So ah jacker get no sleep
That's how we get down
It's World War C
To pay for the sequel
Muthufuckers getting smoked
And that's what it equals
Estoy arriba
From that Cheech and Chong
Badass joint so I can work on my song
Top half black Chucks
And some black bandannas
My face like ah stoke
Got the black ski mask
Es como yo trabajo
Rappers getting guerra
Con palabra los mato
That's ah deadline
I'm ah make em me
If not they get found
******* dead in the street
I got weapons and tactics
I deploy on you
Situation getting happy
With that sinister crew
Out of the blue
Here come the Tommy guns
We're just getting started
But you've already done
I got weapons and tactics
Specialized
To hit you with ah bullet
in between your eyes
Bye Bye
It's not ah lullaby
It's ah walk by shooter
On the enemy side
Ese cut throat game
That we play
Vatos get cut almost everyday
Mis pensamientos
Son controlados por mi
Cause from the track come on
I'm all you see
I'm still here
After all these years
Won't think ah different knowledge
Cause you in my peers
That's why I feed
Ese on the weak
I tear em up to shreds
seven days ah week
So behind
The closed doors where I be
I plan murders on the enemy
All my tactics learned
I stuff em in ah truck
Then watch em burn
Gang banging .usica
Got you ducking vatos
limo cause I'll shoot at ya
Exhale beyond Aztec kingdom
I'm on another planet
Coming back to get ya
I got weapons and tactics
I deploy on you
Situation getting happy
With that sinister crew
Out of the blue
Here come the Tommy guns
We're just getting started
But you've already done
I got weapons and tactics
Specialized
To hit you with ah bullet
in between your eyes
Bye Bye
It's not ah lullaby
It's ah walk by shooter
On the enemy side
The pistol booming
I'm mind consuming
Sleep walking out your door
What the ******* doing!
Totalitarian this regime
I pulled up just to strangle the scene
I'm sixteen Ese from their ice
Cause I'm muthufucking tweaking for the rest Of the night all night You meet zombie naco
No vacation this Nal Cabo
I'm one In ah ******* million
So know it well
With who your dealing
I indoctrinate Then I elevate
Then I go around the corner and move some weight So what you got
I got more than you
More than all you muthufuckas posted up in your tomb I lay seize
To any domain
Either you get down or
your team get slay
First sight is too little time but first word is just enough.
I felt the hook slide through my lip and it tasted sweet like lies.
Those words and syllables and ties and lies
Sent tingles from my lips to my hips to my fingertips.
It felt like paisley bandannas and lollipops
From the good old days when raindrops didn’t burn.
Each letter echoed through my ears and out through my nose,
Then I snorted them again like an addict would.
I breathed you and tasted you and pictured you.
I loved you just then.
Listen closely now because I want you to hear me
With your eyes and your lips.
Your ears can rest
Because all you need to know is that
I am not beautiful but I taste like roses.
When the air gets cold and
I can taste the peppermint of winter-time
I’ll think of you and know that you taste it to.
Even if you’re galaxies away and
Can’t hear me when I call you
I know that we are one because
I feel your heart beating
When the hammer slams down and your teeth hit mine.
When the kiss of death falls upon me and
You’re its deliverer and
I can’t breathe but I can scream,
I will surrender to your antics and
Fall slowly with you till the cotton candy clouds catch me.
I’ll know that you never even knew me but
You swept me away anyway.
I’ll love you then.
tumelo mogomotsi Apr 2017
grainy screens, box televisions
animated dreams, analog missions
black fingers, fixing antennas
blasphemous winners, street fighter bandannas
tiger knee, tiger knee
finish him, 2003
brush cut years, empty front teeth
peanut butter sandwiches, green backyards
fingers in the soil, counting each white star
lights by the gate, daddys black car
mommys macaroni, dinner by the black box.

- t.m
M K Feb 2015
They always taught us that angels were beautiful golden haired creatures; pale skin, soft features, the warriors of the big man upstairs.
I always thought that angels were just bright, bright stars; who come down to earth to help us shine brighter.
I've met many angels in my life.
One was a kind older woman, my mothers age, that wore scarves and bandannas to cover her shaven head. She liked going out for corn dogs when the chemo was too much.
One was a rounder taller woman, a booming voice and a smile always on her face. Whenever I thought of her, I saw copper pennies.
Angels come to us when we need them most, they say.
But they never said about when they go away.
When all that's left is a feather and a few precious memories.
When they're reduced to a spark compared to how much they shone.
When all that's left for you is a feather and memories.
They never said to me what happens when they leave, yes.
But they never told me that more come our way.
Here there be angels.
heather leather Jun 2015
you still sleep with the same blanket you had
when you were five and sometimes when you get
scared of thunder you walk into your closet
and cry and i know because i stayed up all night
trying to find a way for you to close your eyes
and sleep
.
you smile at the corners of your cheeks
i never thought dimples meant that much to me
until i met you and i don't know if you can
ever understand that the butterflies will never leave
as long as you hold my hand and i'm afraid of the
dark and the way people are and
i'm still finding it hard to talk to strangers but
with you by my side it's not as complicated as it usually would be
.
you're the only boy i know who wears bandannas
and hates the smell of smoke and i'm still
trying to figure out if we're meant to be but i'm learning
that finding that out is not as important as it seems
because you still have to count 10 sheep before
you sleep and your eyes travel everywhere before
they close at night and i know because i stay up all night
with you darling and there's no other place
i'd rather be

(h.l.)
did i just write a happy poem i think i did iT FINALLY HAPPENED WOW
Mateuš Conrad Nov 2017
i write upon the colour of defeat -
defaced, defamed, devalued,
inconsistencies plagiarise -
      what would ever make a handyman
forget his tools, fixing a window?
such a bountiful array of drill heaads
left vacant on my bed?
i'll gloat and chance my inquiry upon
the fact that my bedroom is bloated -
hence i gloat -
            books stacked from floor up
to the ceiling...
      a library of music that makes radio
anything but a platform unused to
master talking...
                       a hanging George flag
folded encompassed by two bandannas -
and a salty perfume of a drunk
clinging to what is best described
as: even the drowning man will hold onto
a razor blade...
i actually dream of shaving,
         one solid year and i think about
attiring myself with a goatee,
to simply feel that, scraping sensation
is not merely sandpaper -
      i miss it more than a woman's kiss...
see, the problem with poles emigrating is
that, on the rare occasion they congregate as
a minority...
        poles are strange in that they thrive
like fungus, but only when isolated -
they are the epitome mimic in situ...
        the proverb of any exiled poles
is best left alone -
                 there will be a part of this observation
when i say that i, rummaged in
the underbelly of england, mostly among
the celts - irish or pict scotch -
        and will look at the english with
a strange familiarity of bewilderment -
the ironic huh?
               you live here, oh, i thought you
were here as primarily in, passing...
                   i can embrace a form of islam -
sure... but it's not a taste for submission
that i like:
           let me give you the second schism of
this religion...
         i'm sometimes concerned with the minaret
and the celebration of all things lunar &
lunatic...
                   an aisti -
i surrender to the sway of Xerxes orderning
the whipping of the Aegean -
                i surrender on my own terms,
but that also makes me things beyond necessitating
an obedient servant...
i believe in prokofiev's lieutenant kijé -
kij - stick - kije sticks -
             zbałamucić - to profane -
to attache mongrel -
            i will ensure language is felt as if
an **** has just taken place,
  with the desired annex of ancient rome...
tickling as much as tingling the fancy of
such comparison being made in the first place...
dreptać -
           tiptoeing like a centipede -
           hrap = a snore...
               hrapać = to snore...
how the ancient tongue wriggles and wines
to be nudged into waking from
its slumbers, mummified in an acquired
tongue...
               i can't even begin to comprehend
why i've become more english
than the english...
  with their cosmopolitanism that replaced
a ****'s worth of soul regarding their
waking hour and the death bed...
    i have no desire for resignation within
these confines,
             i have become a monstrosity of
imitation,
           so inept at "faking" the natives that
i have no desire for their women,
other than the taste of admiration for
their eccentric beauty...
                  yet so chameleon-fleshed,
so bland in blending -
               that i'm starting to inquire as to how
much alienation of bring to surface
in the immediacy of, barely scratching
to revise a whimper...
                only the best liars are those
who believe they are telling the truth...
        from truth to lie via tease -
         lying has become nothing short of
telling a **** good joke...
                      hence the idiot in me sometimes
laughs, at the mere stress of
identifying with a consciousness not so much
aligned with a sharpening of,
  toward seconding a transcendental layer -
but simply from an awareness of there being
thought -
               a tongue detached from
laceration - floating freely,
          in some demand for superiority -
breathless, ageless, limbo's saint Sebastian...
               past the slurring past the anguish
of: in the defence of -
               god, that defence of speech when
compared to the abstraction of tongue that is
thought is comparable to the dichotomy of
the effortlessness of a butterfly's two weeks,
or the lament of the prisoner of Pignerol...
once you have lived in a homogeneous society
you'd start to inspect whether talking
is at a freedom of exhorting
           the painful expense -
               in defence of free speech:
  it has become exhausted -
it has become exhausted to the point
where it's actually become exhausting to
speak, let alone defend an innate need to be allowed
to do so...
                 turn off, tone down, shut up.
nothing short of any other dictum -
         merely an upper tier of the "right" to
vote...
            for so much freedom resting upon
making a choice, so much is despotically:
obligatory.
Travis Green May 2019
I got mad love for men,
men of deep designs, men
of glorious dreams, men
of magnificent memories,
men of platinum status in sync
with the power of the whirling
wind, shimmering seas, grand
features, thick eyebrows of towering
trombones, jazzy, dazzling, grasslands
of gleaming desires, grasslands of flaming
vowels, vivid perimeters, and centimeters
seeping into spectacular meters.  Men
of light.  Men of flight.  Men of timeless
rewinds.  Men of defined dimensions,
invigorating inventions, seamless eyes,
deep minds brightening beyond the bridges
of life, soulful imagination, a million
creations of epic explorations, juicy lips
filled with burning beats, upbeat angles,
chests of captivating continents, chests
of growing gardens, chests of astonishing
architecture.  Men of glowing vibrations.
Men of intense shine.  Men of artistic
masterpieces.  Men of picturesque
platforms, complex thoughts exceeding
boundless galaxies, bursting boulevards,
bones of glory, bones of majestic kingdoms,
absolute borders, crowned nouns, and pronouns,
lucid rhymes and sweet lyrical content.
Men of ******* rhythms.  Men of fire
slamming rockets.  Men of soul.
Men of flowing verbs.  Men of high
blazing swag, thrilling tattoos, and dope
flow, bling-bling, chains of glistening
stars, harbor of amazing streets becoming
crystal bright and full of delight.  Men
of brilliant bandannas.  Men of denim
and spectacular style, flashy rides,
flawless rims, the heart of their existence
a captivating collection traveling throughout
endless lands.

— The End —