I found myself almost struggling
to keep my head under water
I dont want to breathe
but the thought of my mother crying
pulls me up like a force of gravity

I emerge above the surface
the air poisoning my lungs
i want so bad the sweet embrace of water
to blank out for a bit
but my sweet mother, like a force of gravity

I saw myself
living in a green cottage near the sea
a bike ride from town to fetch fresh fruits
my lover,
planting new flowers in our yard.

Then the crystal ball broke
and i was back in my room
singing upon the mirror
to a lover that didn't exist
But with hope

i push through each day,
a step towards that green cottage near the sea.

There is a peace in the morning
the lark singing, but only ever so gently for you
a clean mist that breathes life into the earth.

I wake up to catch the Dawn
like your name
so much magic in 30 minutes.

A kiss between the brows
a hazy lazy smile.
Morning coffee and freshly washed hair

I need not spend my life chasing heaven
it is all around me if i looked harder
even if i must wake from this fantasy.

So many people focus on finding love
I'm too busy finding myself

I refuse to be the moon.
I will not merely reflect the light of another.
Standing in the shadows.
I was born to shine and spread my own light.
I will light up your sky.
And you will feel my heat.

"I'm an open book"
She says

Written in
code.

What if every little thought
That lives inside your head
Instead of hiding away in there
Was spoken out, was said?

Would you be embarrassed?
Would you hate your mouth?
Would you rather be mute
Than let the truth come out?

What if every little thing
That people thought of you
Instead of being tucked away
Was heard, was listened to?

Would you be ashamed?
Would you cover your ears?
Would you rather be deaf
Than let the truth come near?

And what if every image
That passes through your thoughts
Was freed from its prison
To roam until it rots?

Would you be disgusted?
Would you look away?
Would you rather be blind
Than see your thoughts at play?