It was Friday
a boring morning
of lessons
geography and maths
and some work
on some king
who had lots of wives
and beheaded a few

after lunch
in the spare classroom
assigned as the sandwich room
I went out onto the field
taking in the sunshine
the blue sky
and others about
on the green grass

boys kicking a ball about
girls sitting in groups
giggling or talking
a few in pairs walking along
a boy here and there
with a girl holding hands
(romance stuff)

some girls with skip ropes
or a ball throwing
between each

I saw Yiska
sitting on the grass
with two other girls
in deep conversation
she stood up
when she saw me
and came over

I have read some
of that book
you gave me
she said
don't understand
some of it

we walked away
from the other girls
they watched us
talking no doubt
what don't you understand?
I asked

copulation
she said
what does that mean?

what do you think it means?

she looked back
at the girls
who were looking our way
and talking

don't know
she said
never heard
the word before

it means
having ****** *******
I said quietly

*******?
she said
I understand ******
but *******
seems too scientific

boys shouted
from across the field
someone had scored a goal
between two jackets
on the grass

a relationship
in a ****** way
I said

she stopped
and gazed at me

the book has some pictures
but it's confusing
she said

have you shown
your parents?
I asked

God no
she said
you want to get me
whacked?

just joking
I said

we walked on again
where did you get the book?
she asked

I found it in a drawer
in an old sideboard
at home
I said
it's quite old
think it was my gran's

the words seem hard
to understand
she said
the pictures
in brown and white

yes I noticed
the one about the baby
in the woman's womb
I said

but what
do you have to do?
she asked
to have a baby?

it says
I said

does it?
she asked

yes many times
in different ways
I replied

she sighed
******* is that it?

I nodded
she looked puzzled

so not just kissing?

no not just that

or touching?
she said

not just touching

we came to the fence
and looked
at the passing traffic

that girl in class said
that if you kiss too much
you get pregnant
Yiska said

no not that
I said
where's the book now?

in the cabinet by my bed
she said

will your mother
see it there?

hope not

does she look
through your stuff?

not as far as I know
Yiska said

she leaned in
and kissed me
warm lips on warm lips
her hands around my neck

I put my hands
around her waist
off across the playing field
a bell tolled
from the school

we pulled apart
and walked back
towards school
an odd beating
within
my fourteen year
old heart.

Moments in life that jab hearts
And make you forget all the bad parts
Short, but potent enough to leave a permanent stain on your memory
Unsexual Intimacy
That tickles both spirits
Forever wishing you could relive it
Your simple presence
The memory and feelings are the only remnants
Inexplicable intenseness

**** its been years since this thoughts had popped in my head
some of them were good , some were bad, some caused my life to be dead
i cry from tears of joy, sadness, and anger
sometimes i can really put my life at at a risk, at danger
so many dates, and still its a gashly fade
wouldn't be myself if it wasn't for the memories i made
i saw my mom cry for the endless addings of the problems
i saw her giving me her hand when i said i don't know how ill slove them
i saw my nephew being born again and again until i see the signs
im stuck in addiction, and i cant figure out why?
i saw the cop chasing me down to a dead end stop, until i got to the ground
i saw myself lookin at my stupidity luaghting at everything around
i dont see a childhood, and i cant see my future
but i can say what i am know , i need the help, a injection with a cure
i dont sleep and don't eat and only cried about a few times
i still see myself on the corner street asking for nickels and dimes
im sorry mom i love you, i committed the hugest mistake
but this situation isnt just a piece of cake
i see my self walk and talk about gibberish crap
i dont like this stupid cheessy unsexual rap

Moments in life that jab hearts
And make you forget all the bad parts
Short, but potent enough to leave a permanent stain on your memory
Unsexual Intimacy
That tickles both spirits
Forever wishing you could relive it
Your simple presence
The memory and feelings are the only remnants
Inexplicable intenseness