Wondering if now is the time to say goodbye
To give up the hope that once
filled my soul
To crush the dreams that at the time
Could have filled a sky...

Unrequited,
Unrelinquished,
Unfit,

Tell me why the summer comes so slow
But the winter, it is long
Why the rush of spring, why the burst of energy?
Because the cold feels like an eternity

Take me back to the days of spring
Of birth and feelings of new
Of energy and vitality
Life.

I no longer want to feel like, i’m, falling
-Falling, into the pits of winter
To the darkness
the gloomy;
To the unrequited
the unrelinquished;
Among the bottles

O there are so many bottles
Each one filled with so much
But they lay until spring returns
To shatter them to pieces
And to release their contents once again

I can't believe this is happening to me
Oh, thank you God for blessing me.

I know your bringing something into my life
Something that will make everything alright.

My soul expanded and spirit so blessed
If I could, I would do it again.

You've taught me things I never knew
Oh God, what would I do without you?

Eternally blessed, and surrounded by your love
My heart and soul will forever be above.

The wanderers lips chapped thirsty
peeled and parched in deserts inhuman
of love bereft,sought hard but unfound!
a search on legs last,romance unfazed,
for that mirage shimmering hazily afar
of her eyes, face and lips softly smiling.
so dear once,long abandoned in betrayal.
a heartfull of love unrelinquished still,
throbbing unforgotten in existence skeletal
pausing for breaths last, a hoping soul numb,
now sighting that luscious red neon cherry
the glossy round O of Marylin the pretty
a wan smile just, of a small solace strange
lit up on a face entreating so desperate.
paving happily the deaths way at last
blown in the wind final,an abstract kiss.

Breathtaker

unknowingly
herself


to be capable of splitting atoms

          [of unrelinquished hearts]

of striking chords

          [of graveyard whispers]

of swimming endlessly

          [of setting suns]


Breathtaker

veiledly
herself


in imitation smiles

          [in huntress stripes]

in doe-eyed brilliance

          [in one thousand yards]

in cocktail laughter

          [in autumnal sighs]


Breathtaker

suffocating
us all

Alone in the Empty night.

The tears flow down slowly at first,
Resolving into a waterfall.
Uncontrollable fears, icy cold current,
Dragging down to
Unrelinquished pressure.
Sopping wet boots,
Suctioned to numb toes and feet,
A weight that won't let go.
Reaching up...
But there's no purchase on the
Slime filmed rocks.

Tortured... Drowned.

To the stars, a wish I make,
A sweet and hoped not bitter lie.
Aloud to no one else I take,
Aloud alone by night I cry.
Forevers strong unrelinquished love -
As sweet as a sleeping rose,
With all the care of a gentle dove,
My heart to you I must empose,
To lie with you is now a dream but sweet,
Just so far as a cold mountain peak.
My mind and heart intensely beat,
Alas the thought of you I seek.
Along fair love, I dream of you soon,
After the death of the unrelenting moon.

Imagery friends that were surrounded in my childhood,
many of my friends had one or two I had five.
I asked them when we grew from seed to leaf
where are they now?
Are they only in your dreams,
did you bury then beneath the ground.

Some cried others not understanding what I meant,
but my imaginary friends they were still here
they had buried some of those that friends had wondered
where they had gone.
No longer in conciseness more like decaying thoughts.

I saw my friend she had an object in her hand,
giggling she looked down it wasn't within her
grasp but mine. "You are the one, and as I looked
and saw the affection of reality in a pulp of unrelinquished
resentment. You are ours not those of other moments.

They became what once was games now I saw them tease
upon my existence, my moments were a mirage of pain.
I walked down the street, and an old lady was waiting
tirelessly for a bus till he smeared his being on her
and pushed. The poor driver of that bus never stopping again.

They played me, dancing around my sanity like I was the
rose and they were song repeating within my mind.
These were my bad seed of my imagination. If you think
those of thought are real, in time substance becomes reality
only in the essence that you can see.

I used to find them funny, I used to even in later years still
talk to them. But now my seeds have grown and the petals
they grow are not of this world. Have you ever thought your falling?
well its those friends that need attention in your blind sight.
*"Wake up little one its time to play, which one is my friend today,

The Hanged Man

Too much noise, too much noise around me,
Too many contradictions that creates confusion inside me.
As the noose slips around the branch of this secular oak and rests upon my shoulders.
I wonder how many lovers laid their passions at the roots of this lonly observer of unrelinquished desires.
In a way he is my only companion in my pursuit of inner peace that no longer makes me a hermit of my own desires.
For I fear that I shall be no more than a spec of dust in the light of the ever changing fate.
For that I alone am responsible of this apocalypse of regrets.
For I know that my noose will forever stay as a collar of remembrance.
This will be the only step that I will never regret for not taking it.
The shadows will have to wait for me, before I will embrace their calling.

We were play dates shutting down dive bars, biting off more than we could chew.
The echoes of our laughter
crescendoed over the sea of lonely patrons,
a somber feeling that we unfortunately knew.
Were we captivated by conversations
or had it subconsciously been our eyes all along?
Windows to the soul.
Holding onto the agonies,
that only we would ever truly know.
Our rugged exteriors,
so easily unraveled with subtlety.
Eye contact,
rarely,
if ever,
was it realized so indiscriminately.
I intentionally drug my feet
when we walked the frostbitten winter streets
taking in music
and whatever that feeling was,
because,
we were warned it’s not for us to keep,
we’ll always lose it.
I trailed behind you in a childlike protest,
prolonging the inevitable,
of cleaning up yet another self inflicted mess.
Hands would wander down the alleyways,
our bodies merely in tow,
illuminating the darkness,
to wrestle with our invisible foe.
“You better go.
Now.
I’m beginning to like you.”
Grasping,
pulling,
unwavering grip.
“It’s the way you’d bite my lower lip
and push your hips against my hips”
as you breathed your afflictions into me,
daring me to come home.
All too familiar was the suffering
that pulsed throughout my veins,
displaced residuals of ecstasy, solitude, unrelinquished pain.
What happened to the time?
We tiptoed through a hazy slew
of a hundred halfhearted goodbyes.
I always turned back around
to steal another glimpse though.  
I thought you knew why.

I thought you knew why,


I thought you knew,



I thought…

At least under influence
The strained sky doesn’t rain
As much anymore, plaid shirts
Sticking to the empty walls
Sundry fabrics staining the
Disgustingly beige paint
And hands brought up
As if to faint? The struggle

To rip the shirts off the walls
And make the sundry fabrics
Less sundry; the struggle,
To watch the sun go down
And bring the sky with it -
It overcomes me, it fulfills me,

It gives me a purpose
That fits like a square block
In the absence of any holes
Busies my hands with new blood
The next ****** victim being my
Unrelinquished boredom
And the next pain I will relish in:
My endless hyper fixations.

here we are again
face to sky
with a full wolf moon

i don't know this road
the journey all to familiar
as the grains of sand under your nails
after a day clawing at the ocean

do you hear the depths roar
or does she whisper to you
i faintly remember her voice

when i am high in the mountains
call out to me
like i wish you would

i have only now
learned of my brokenness
i have only now learned
of things beyond my knowledge

how many times
must i admit my fault
how many times
must i pull my foot
out of my mouth
i do not relish the taste of soil
you know i am a foolish fool
i cannot speak for you bitterness

my truth is different now
though unlived, uncovered, unbound
all but unrelinquished

i am swept under the rug of your past life
the splinters of the floor flaking away from the boards
we too will turn to dust