forced to ask 'is it all *******'
this field of study just completed
this path now flying feet fleet'd
I, alumni all outwardly faux alacrity
but instead really inside shades drawn
hiding shame useless
waiting for the sun's forebearant rays
to pull dead drunk me off floor again
still sick sinning spinning lies
on nodal web patterns
of activation

just a narcissist sociopath-in-training
(was I?) being taught how better
to manipulate other's fate
for personal gain

great fat magnificent magnanimous beast
loafing on liar's chair o'great victory-defeat
doublespeak tho Orwell is long dead and we do mourn him so with eulogy eyes
that weep crocodile tears of
well hidden liars

having long forgotten how to believe
in anything aside from own ill-gotten
gains, they mean nothing more
than bloodstained verses
anemic murmurs
whispered great
whisky hopes
and sallow
cheeked
dreams

As I walk
I ruminate
on death and life
On why there is so much love
And so much strife

The heart it’s nature intrinsic
Is to seek
The bonds that bind
The soul to the earth

The heart is tied to a nodal beat
And functions to generate ****** heat
To celebrate this life  full and enjoy
To love another with complete joy

The soul’s mission extrinsic
Is to simply soar majestic
Created a free verse
It desires to float in the universe

The heart was formed at this birth
The soul existed before birth
And shall exist after death

This difference between the heart and soul
Is the reason for our sorrows sole!
Why then you cry my dear friend
For there is no meaning to our earthly end

There is simply no premise
For the sadness of this corporeal demise
For the soul was born to journey endless
To be merged with Brahman consciousness
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brahman
Author Notes

He made me move on the rough edges
to the abyss of ‘ I ’, persuasive, but strong
for a thrilled journey, on the snow-clad
relationship between disquietening
follicles of wants.

Completely alert, still drowning in fear
of abstract river, of fire, of nodal pain
of self-destruction. Suicide was below dignity.
This was annihilation of the present, past and future
in realm of faith versus asexual love of sin.

Only one moment was sufficient to disturb me,
between me and my flips, between captive
and captor. The quiet honing of silence
for breeding vowels and petals of narcissus.
Black moon, I always loved you.

I blow my nose in your direction with only my left-nose section as I
have allergic reactions to your long-haired-*****-cat-hair collection
The United States has many big lottery losers & big lottery winners
who enjoy drunken evenings ******* cousins & eating T.V. dinners
Food is, or can be, healthful, not healthy, 'cause Rege Cordic's dead
& lowered into a hole to putrefy from a well-bled, brain-rotted head
that decays above a cellar of French wine leakin' from casks of lead
into ****** spores of paranormal nodal points pointed up in our bed