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Sum It Sep 2013
My problem with me
is the problem of mine
of not knowing
the Problem I have
and I am still suffering
without knowing why
This sweet suffering
started with you
crossing my view
and that view hitted me
somewhere beside my eyes
may be, heart-- guess why
that is where my problem lies
its normality is gone
Also may be mind
ask me again--why!
I lose myself
when I am with you
I lose myself from me
To find myself in you!
My problem with me
is the problem you give
by not knowing
the problem I have
with you; around you
without you; among everyone
Written on August 24, 2013
Tanya Apr 2016
I do not want tomorrow to come
Today was bad
But tomorrow is going to be worse
Spilled cups of tea awaits me
Overboiled milk is just around the corner
Burnt eggs, papercuts, hitted pinky toes
All the small misfortunes
That make my life unbearable
One over another, One over another,
One over another,
Heavy piles of obsticles
Burden my shoulders
But all this is just in my head.
Sammie Sep 2017
A photograph in my hand
Of a stranger that came to my land
It was a long long time ago
When compassion was greater than ego
My heart was a barren gift
Where in, now, that stranger just fits
But the truth was only bitter
For all that is gold does not glitter
The stranger had left as quick as a flash
And my heart's desires just turned to ash
The reality had finally hitted so hard
All it stayed here were his open cards
Now as I lay here on my bed
With all his memories in my head
I wish so hard to turn back the time
Where I could have avoided this lovely crime
Of becoming so perfect with the imperfect stranger
And let him become my life changer!
viz hitted courtesy debilitating panic attacks

Upon waiting for vehicular repair
today November 19th, 2019 at:
CJ'S TIRE & AUTOMOTIVE SERVICES
(1405 S Township Line Rd,
Royersford, PA 19468),
yours truly, i.e. mister re: man
registered lamentable paroxysm.

All thru mein kampf inferiority complex
analogous invisible muscular heft did flex,
quaking, hijacking, agonizing...
jinxed irrevocable hex
re: heredity did initially index

courtesy Boyce and Harris,
who begat me
guaranteed, fixed, decreed...
courtesy accursed lex
lucifer mortal christened
Matthew Scott Harris – insinuated

jackknifed, kickstarted, limned,
machined, nixed, ordered... orifex
encompassing hardiest inscrutable
seminal entry point
penetrated zona pellucida, qua Rex

wrought flawed crown
faulty erroneous biological code,
within body electric mutation
fleshed out, I lament
analogous courtesy neophyte Unix

programmer, yes I hedge
to intimate biological event
upon impregnation sent
reproductive juices into action
miracle whipped processes
wielded unbeknownst advent,

whereby subsequent
cell division manifested,
albeit nine months later enfant
terrible asper:in,
this then newborn gent
lo' within zygote,

every generic ingredient
already harbored yours truly
characteristic weaknesses full extent
unbeknownst until DNA blooper rent
birthed, thence as I developed absent

pronounceable kinks vis a vis
trademark characteristics became present
evinced thru behavioral, emotional,
interpersonal, neurological aberrations

costing me (lake dude...) woebegone descent
wretchedness faux forfeiting every moment
only recent (think today)
entire existence misspent

oddly enough even compromising
ability to serve meant
two daughters, (especially eldest)
decry horrible life pent
up with rage against human machine

referring to paternal birth parent,
whose pathetic example rent
asunder psyches linked with offspring
hence, I best ought to have
joined a convent (ha).

Twas really only of late,
I realized fuller blown extent
house zing deplorable... state
absolute zero scholastic, tete a tete
opportunistic, generic, athletic...
**** sapien astride oblate
spheroid devoid of any
marketable skill doth resonate.
Fools talking, all that ******* be walkin,
Famous man hawkin,
**** the battle rap,
I put caps,
In ya head, bet y'all take a dirt nap,
From the murderous shots,
Of lyrical heavy hitted jots,
No need for pen and paper,
I just let, the mic skills **** ya,
Whats a rabbit to a hare?,
No need to really compare,
My skills powerful,
As the ninth level ***** collateral,
Learned from the general,
Chinese art of war serial,
Numbers put ya beats to slumber,
Hits like thunder mixed with lightning under,
The cloud of my rhymes, see me reign on your design,
Better call one time, cant stop my shine,
Even if the darkness, was combined,
Twist ya spine, not even the MRI's, could figure out the design,
I told yall once more,
Dont none, want it with the *******,
Eradicate ya battle, slit ya rattle, watch ya headless body run,
Its a spiritual stun, dun dun,
Cant **** with the Sons,
Taking back my kingdom,
Most these rappers is worry some,
Cant speak on the real,
Only salute to the real,
Sting me like Ray Davies, they im misbehaving see,
Cant push the products, cuz every one else, sound like ducks,
I speak volumes, to make the dead rise,
Illuminate my eyes,
From the sunrise, killed by tomorrow, dont feel no sorrow,
Owl ****, coming to borrow,
Split the airways, from the arrow,
Let the wind, voice, and mic come together,
Switch up my styles, like seasonal weather, how can ya endeavor,
Fortune over fame,
**** a name and a dame, crush weak rappers is my domain,
eastern standard time Autumn Equinox arrives

That seasonal occasion twill arise
when darkness and light doth bring
equilibrium between night and day
raking leaves will constitute exercise
espied and witnessed by observant earthling
namely me who subsequently bellows hooray
jumping for joy childlike behavior I improvise
reliving boyhood mirth itching and inching
playfully scattering laborious effort lay
ying down burying self amidst tree humus - prize
zing spontaneity willingly orchestrating
shedding inapropos edict qua grown man at play.

A meadow for Autumn begins,
when eve doth fall upon summers’
and long ago mine childhood's end,
a hint of splendor bequeathed arose
upon firmament as changed scenery
(third equinox act since new year) bellows
basses loaded and blasted in sync
with pyrotechnic pizzazz,
while electric light orchestras suites scored for cellos
thus quiet riot of multitudinous notes swirl
from each bronzed leaf like fellows
dancing elliptically forsooth greeting mother earth
with char: rills brawn son utter hellos.

How peachy keen and grand to be seated
at plum lined tree center stage
to behold the colorful
capering downward spiraling threnody
quintessential silent rage
chapter three if nature alluded to
as a tome poem – and now the first page
known to humans since…way before indigenous tribes
occupied North America such as the Osage
and/or other natives, whose keen scents foretold
the onset from flora and fauna sings they did gauge.

Now regimentation of existence commandeered
by strict adherence affianced to the clock,
where misery loves company
lest an employee arrive one second late –
her/his pay will go hickory dock,
which sequestration to twenty first century life
analogous to men undergoing emasculation,
whereby he may as well be ******
without thick horn, where business
deals concluded as overhead a flock

of seagulls migrate to southern climes,
which with global warming seems ad hoc
yet the multitudinous animals and plants
genetically under rubric of life lock
which mucking around viz industrialization
humankind doth make a mock
‘ere re: and drive many miniscule species
to take safety and shelter under a rock
totally oblivious, those bipedal hominids haphazardly
scurry to work in order to purchase schlock.

Thus pre dormant season of the witch,
where one must be vigilant and tread
like angels heeding curtain call
draw wing summer to a close
with **** the torpedoes salvo,
the cacophony kaleidoscope of color
viz hitted courtesy sixty plus shades of red -
rose iz madder than horde of Bulls at Pamplona
forecast thee onset of cooler temperatures
with Falun Gong foliage natural compost

shelter burrowing creatures, who stash goodies
at a later time to be fed
thus each of us need be vigilant
with no misstep to tread
upon feet lightly negotiating
whereat dwells busy itty-bitty bodies
well nigh invisible to the naked eye,
yet if ground swell of organisms espied
one would behold microscopic
whirled wide webbed world.
viz hitted courtesy debilitating
one after another panic attack
analogous being bombarded with flak
worse fate then death
or being tortured on the rack,
no mortal experience compares
regarding psychological paralysis
just ask me who would even choose
electroconvulsive therapy  
making my body go wickety wack.

Upon waiting for Godot (ha)
yours truly, i.e. mister re: man
registered lamentable paroxysm.

All thru mein kampf inferiority complex
analogous invisible muscular heft did flex,
quaking, hijacking, agonizing...
jinxed irrevocable hex
re: heredity did initially index
courtesy Boyce and Harriet,
who begat me
guaranteed, fixed, decreed...
courtesy accursed lex
lucifer mortal christened
Matthew Scott Harris - insinuated

jackknifed, kickstarted, limned,
machined, nixed, ordered... orifex
encompassing hardiest inscrutable
seminal entry point
penetrated zona pellucida, qua Rex
wrought flawed crowning zygote
(a diploid cell resulting from fusion
of two haploid gametes; a fertilized ****)
plus played knick knack
paddy whack during ***
faulty erroneous biological code,

within body electric mutation
fleshed out, I lament
analogous courtesy neophyte Unix
programmer, yes I hedge
to intimate biological event
upon impregnation sent
reproductive juices into action
miracle whipped processes
wielded unbeknownst advent,
whereby subsequent
cell division manifested,
albeit nine months later enfant
terrible asper:in,

this then newborn age zero gent
lo' blending of gametes,
mature haploid male
or female germ cell
every generic ingredient
already harbored yours truly
characteristic weaknesses full extent
unbeknownst until DNA blooper rent
birthed, thence as I developed absent
pronounceable kinks vis a vis
trademark characteristics became present
evinced thru behavioral, emotional,

interpersonal, neurological aberrations
costing me (lake dude...)
falling into deep waters
re: Lake Woebegone suffocating descent
wretchedness faux forfeiting every moment
only recent (think today)
entire existence misspent
oddly enough even compromising
ability to serve meant
two daughters, (especially eldest)

decry horrible life pent
up with rage against human machine
referring to paternal birth parent,
whose pathetic example rent
asunder psyches linked with offspring
hence, I best ought to have
joined (NOT nunce sense), a convent
but methought perch ants donning habit
and trumpeting celibacy fore conclusion
how life of yours truly (me) best be spent.

Twas really only of late,
I realized fuller blown extent
house zing deplorable... state
absolute zero scholastic, tete a tete
opportunistic, generic, athletic...
**** sapien astride oblate
spheroid devoid of any
marketable doth resonate.
Eri Dec 4
Let it go, in the rooms with no light
I scratch, scream and take a bite
Pillow soaked in saltwater all night
Forgotten everything when it hits daylight
Maintain is forgotten, now it's «alright»
Ones they get you, they no longer fight

Fabric soft and scent become drugs
Where I finally get rest in their warm hugs
Protected, is a powerful shield
No one can enter my strong minefield.
The top blocks is from his touch
But the word-blocks can’t build much
The gate will be easy to break in
Given out limited blocks from the trash bin..

Pulling up defense with a gun and a sword
Don’t touch anything you can’t afford!
Different tunes, they’re hard to understand
One day touch will be the their last demand

Its the quiet times I yell the loudest
Its shut closed to stay strong and robust
Not enough for my needs and my must
Giving me enough to barely survive
Small hopes, but not to near feel alive

My romance is stuck in this gloomy night
As a candle that burns with its last light.
Only to get hit with reality of sorrow
(Hitted, kicked and a shot with black arrow) optional
No healing is there in tomorrow.
No one cares about past details
Still hopeless in love with old fairytales.

Waiting to reach out on a regular friday
But its all quiet and the boats has left its bay
He has nothing to say
*** he don’t think that way

Waiting for her wings to finally fly at last
The unhappiness feelings of unhealed past
When gaining a beautiful silver pearl
Only to seek out for another girl

Telling my love in a letter with a gentle tissue
Leaving a piece of me in a small statue
Only to forget, not once, not twice
«But it only matters if it has a price»
So tired

— The End —