sought
desperate
and double-sought. at last
inside embracing entombment
the skull-dome of earth my
mother
discovers the maiden intellect kidnapped by further
tomorrows and slakes my thirst on the
blood-brain beneath the hills of nemea.
am i the sa
vior the damsel or the beast?
curdling a slimy finger down the vaginaless brain
long veins delay my knuckles into nightingales between
serrated orifice-incisors made of thought and
all my hunting knives and bludgeons bring no unconsciousness to it. memories
they say
are as much like the present as a lion likes
cat food. The sleeping woman is about to become
cat food. cave shadows cloak what little of her is left
to imagination: nearly dead, nearly
beautiful.
does that brain-like lion stalk impenetrable as hungry
as intelligence as forceful as the crucibles of lust as
remote
as wastelands in the unforgiven breast?
i could asphyxiate that hurdle given resolve
i could lambast a mortal lion with my palms but not this
facsimile of fortitude forcefields intact. through
the nose of the wind and the mouth of the water i found my way
to the eyesockets of the very dirt; a veil
about my brain but
saw it still.
stillness
surrounded.
sought
some sign upon the smooth sphere an opening into
light or lifewaters or cold grey electricity but
no thing could penetrate that sheath of thought -- though it may yearn for fornication
some brains never breed but
condense in darkness
hermaphroditic, hunting through the silent greek city-states for
beautiful bloodrivers. there is no lion no trodden
angel weeping in a cave only
impervious struggling eternal meandering and the jar
of misdirection. thanks, hera
but it looks like you've been foiled once again and this time by your husband's headcold who said
only your brain can outthink your brain. she's a smart owl and
she's right:
every time i think i've reached my goal and
allow a little fortune or fulfillment to escape my maze eleven novel tasks
coagulate beyond my calendars of navigation. blood fills the veins of my
brain engorging it and pressuring it into questionable *******. for
if the sun breeds maggots in a dead lion
then i've emerged from the earth's crevice
victorious and spent. but there's more
to the story as i crawl off down the metaphor
wrapped beneath the brain's skinned hide its
vestigial thoughts arrest me thinking i
know, i know
eleven more sunrises until death.
thanks, brain.

How could we know
how sacred and so pure
metal guidance
magnetic and secure

How could we know
this inner darkness prevails over light
to make us question
what it really means to be right

Our brains so hollow
shallow thoughts enter
delight

Everyone is wrapped up
in themselves
its quite a shame

I can think of me if I want to
I have you to blame

How could we know
how innocent and scared
alone in shadow
complete, yet so unprepared

Un accro*
late night
bouts of creativity
vs. my manic imagination
I was God
and these are the details
I was lost in

Folie à deux
It's kind of a funny story
how I got here
how she got here
how we all got here
Everyone was in this
with a shared diagnosis
pre-hospital
cakewalks
of shredded lunacy

Je t'adore
Her neck was marked
with covered up innocence
Saying she just wants to
adore
or
be
adored
between her sighs
She just wants the words
choked out of her
to roll her tongue

La Petite Mort
Telepathic whispers
vibrating through auras
forcefields
of imagination
the dividing line
between aware
and fantasy
Manipulative
mindfucks
provoking
destructive
tendencies

­This is what brought me here.
This is where it ends
This is where I begin
*C'est la vie

Is it truly human nature
This fear of the unknown?
We see aliens among us
And we'd rather be alone

Not look inside their homeless void
To seas of stars they drift across
From planets now destroyed
Systems rendered lifeless  
By battle droids we have deployed
And Death-star machinations
Despot warlord tractor beams
Cause anti-gravitations
Of resource, culture, sovereignty
Drained into the mothership
Warp-drives of Lady Liberty's
Distortion of democracy

To us their eyes are oil
Their tongues are suicide
Their offspring are jihadists
That we have crucified

The future of their species
Ethnic cleansed and slaughtered
Galactic-level genocide
By humanoid marauders
Reducing sentient creatures
To ion-cannon fodders
Then activate the forcefields
Preventing the invasion
Of refugees we've added
To the anti-life equation
As worm holes of our hatred grow
Infinitely to all we know

Different in appearance
But of the same design
If we'd but open universal
Borders of the mind

It’s all theater
I’m just behind closed curtains
That’s probably why no one looks
The fabric forcefields let me perfect my routine though
I certainly have an array of props to play with
A little cardboard box I call home
My reliable, evergreen jacket that kinda looks like swiss cheese
Oh, and a Styrofoam cup to collect my keep
My reward for tonight’s performance

Are they all in on the act?
Pretending that I don’t exist just for fun?

I must say, this new crowd is pretty **** good
Even the little ones get in on the charade
“Mommy, daddy, look at that ma-“
The clutching and quickened paces tell me those young talents might get cut
What a shame

I remember when my boss hit the line “you’re fired!” with such conviction
I was **** well impressed
When I said I couldn’t pay last week’s rent,
my landlord must have been practicing that disgusted look for hours

I like this new production, though, so it’s all good
Sure, the nights get a bit chilly and the days can be musty
but it’s all just show business
I sleep happily knowing this lifestyle is just a big act
It’s all theater

**….right?

And on the night her life changed before her eyes
She wept
Cheers broke out around her, congratulations and kudos were given
And she
Put up her forcefields and closed her doors once again
To mourn

In the trembling ground she planted a seed
And watered it with a concoction of part--saline-part-hopes-and-dreams drawn from the wells of her eyes
They never quite understood why her knee **** reaction was sadness
Nor did they know of the depths her heart could sink to
They didn't understand that she was different than the rest of them in that to her, happiness was a forced facade of what lie beyond cracked smiles

She mourned her relationships and any attempts to mend broken ones
She wept for the lives she'd never know
She mourned for her mother
She wept for the young woman who gave her up
She mourned the loss of her mountains
And her clear open skies
She wept so that she could no longer tell
Where the monsoon rains started
And where her tears ended

She felt her soul breaking
And she laughed
Isn't it funny
I find it hilarious
How I've shattered myself so frequently
That the shrapnel no longer hurts

-z.z

The sea wall stands
between
Belief and Hope.
A trickle, a river, a sea
longing to drown
An unfettered prison
Forcefields of light, sound, Community

Smiles pried from empty shadows
False fronts staring mercilessly
be Better
don't stray
The Wall is your Salvation
The sea is peril
Dark and Depraved
Stay dry, stay clean, don't touch

But the glassy surface calls
Is sailing touching?
Gliding over portents
brushing the mirror

i don't admire the world anymore
i'd rather see no faces beyond closed doors

if everyone would sleep on a rope laced necklace i think i may be happy

i do not see friends in this glass marble upon which i live anymore
i do not seem many who care but rather just aquire and regress to their own cavern

so many heads turned
but not many ears who listened

people diagnosed with vague perceptions
but yet no one was there to percieve

HOW DARE
fiction off of folk lore

HOW DARE
it is arson to deprive someone from their well being
but it is irrefutably criminal to deprive someones time from their livleihood
time is not in your will

even the most beautiful of eyes may turn to distant shadows
forcefields unspoken when the serpents devour you on proximity

******* a joke

and if i made an error , possible,  i should make ammends for such
i will
the biggest error may be denial of your own error and shame on you
**** everyone

when respect is negligible i question how you will overcome anything in life
all you do is run..