Perpetual sadness
That's all this is
Just a melancholy mind
And a black soul
Twisting together  
To create a darkness
That envelops every
Happy emotion I have
Until they become
Nothing more than
Neutral, dull, nothingness
I can't feel exitement
My laughter is always forced
My smile never stays
My heart always breaks
Perpetual sadness
That's all my life has become
A rerun
Of nothingness

Hello there,
Let me introduce myself.
My name is Punching Bag.

It doesn't matter how long you neglect me,
Because, when you need a scape goat,
I'm just as tough as the day you first met me.

Hit me all you like, I'll barely budge.
And no matter how hard you throw that punch,
I'll only move closer to you.

Not once will I ever swing back.

You'll find those more well-aquainted with me sometimes call me,
Used Tissue.

When things get a little too messy, I'm the reliable one who cleans you up.
Get sick, I'll take care of you.
A broken heart? I'll dry your tears.
I'll fix your make-up.

Then, when the exitement is over,
Just toss me out.
I won't mind.

As you spend more time with me, I'm sure you'll learn to refer to me as:
Closet, or even Mirror.

A part of the furniture you're used to having around
But even whenyou get bored with the look,
You don't throw me out.

I'm a place to point ot your insecurities,
Then hang them up along side your skeletons, locked inside me.

Then, seeing yourself as better than you are,
Go on with your day.

Go ahead and stick a lable on me reading Story Book,
Even though I'm still fairly empty of fairytales inside.

I won't even read into your faibles;
There's nothing more exciting than a history that never really happened, right?

Make up what you think might be fun to tell before passing me to someone else,
To read and add on more.

But, now that you've gotten to know me better, why don't you call me Staircase?

I let people walk on me, walk all over me 'til they reach the top.

I'll have to warn you about this though.
I'm not made of marble, stone or brick.
I'm made of wood that's been warn away by heavy boots
So, each step is a little less thick.
One of my dusty, rotten boards might give way and you might fall.

Please, don't blame me.
Even with all my identities, I can't change what I am.
As har as I try, I'm still only human.

that one night where we both hung over. from that unforgetable night when it was only me and you.
i have the feeling like i just need to start running on the beach with the waves crashing behind me. i cant stop laughing when i read your text you sent me.
every night i get waked out  on the energy drinks i cant live with out.
i set a huge fire spelling your name out pouring gasoline all over it.
every othere day i wach the world go bye.  i lay on the beach looing up at the blue sky day wondering will i have to live alone in this world. no matter ill just walk the nigh sky following every shooting star that fly's by. that one night we both had so much fun that i wish i could have again. i never knew you moved where i lived in this quiet sleepy littel town.

i listen the the wases crashing down making littel pools drown the small ***** that scurry to not posible drown.
the wet sand feels soft and makes my mind run lose with not fear of what will come to me next.

i never slept with out seeing the night sky with all the pondering memories that drive me crazy.
day or night the beach makes my heart skip abeat seeing every one frolik with energy  that never last with out a couples date.

i run every night i adopted a fluffy husky names shelby. every night the sky plays a great light show.
i set the fire on the ****** with drinks and my  guitar. every not i played touched your heart when you were finally moved in.

the song i wrote played out for any one to run out my heart.
i take my lighter and light the lantern that shows the way back to our small cozy house.
my dog has a big heart with no lilits to swimm across the oceans with me if i was stranded getting swept out the see.

that one night i finally feel asleep with sweet dreams making my frown turn in to a smile not a plaster fake.
i sprung up in the morning my phone started ringing out.
the caller id i read out was your name.
the day grew long with the most pretties sun set with red pink skys.
every fire i make in the night i set the fires to show no hate.

i went out at night with my husky shelby taking off running threw the crashing waves the water is cold but its all worth it.
i thought i saw you checking me out.
i dont think im going crazy.
my dog and me wresting.
i started looking right in your big kristsl clear safire blue eyes light my heart on fire.
when we meet again after years apart.you moved in with me and we started our lives to gather.

i gathered my bag with my guitar my pen and note book. with my mind open with thoughts.


i looked up and saw the dark side of the moon.

ill never walk this deslet world along.

evey night me you and our dog shelby light a fire and undress in to our comfei clothes.
we drink the night away dancing away threw the night.
with the full night sky with every star shining.
the night light show we run and dance till we both feel sick and fall down.
i had a feeling deep down ill be with you again some day when i saw you name id on my cell phonee.

that night where i was just wresting around with my husky i  never thought i would live life with out your warm heart exitment.

that night your text i read out loud has brought both our worlds to gather

i never knew when you told me you were searching for me.
now we are happily to gather till time runs out

i never knew that we both cross echotere  that bright starty night with shooting stars.

i never knew i would ever see you agin to be crazy.

i knew my future would be this amazing with tears of love.

i never knew we would pass echoter on a beach with waves crashing all over the shore line

i never knew if i would ever see you again

i live life with exitement .

i will break the limits to have fun weather were all wacked out on somthing

i never knew my wish i made on the shooting stars would make that night crossing us by

parallel motions
aligned in asymmetrical
      symmetry of the
subconscious eyes seeing
abductees of the mind
     gathering in blind
            exitement

opening to the silent sound of
fingers painted in rainbows

        touching the innermost
    honesty of every verbal
echo

mending hearts
                 in no time at all
         needing nothing but
*devotion

.your jealous words

will make a fool of you.

unstable.

creating that bubble of security.

talked into it.

talked out of it

concussed and confused.

the truth lies south.

the world changes and anger ensues those whom have lost themselves.

in losing what i thought was a drop of serenity, humanity, singularity,

i found what i had been missing.

i found the most profound feeling in my mind again,

reazlizing what i was supposed to be filling my life with.

it was the most beautiful of temporary spells.

descrete in meaning,

overwhelming in form.

i reached that treasure in my heart that i had lost to the pirates of time so many moments ago.

reached out my palms and let the time flow through my fingertips.

the unatainable love for life had been captured and caged.

my reality is full and quenched.

so rare,

i describe to you.

silken petals drawing in all the waves of the world,

the things ive lost create the realization of what i really have inside my cup.

im jolting through the golden fields,

swimming gracefully through the torrents of the sea.

calm.

breathing seems to calm the harshest seconds passing through.

emotions sturred, whipped, beat like the yolk of desert.

in the end it rises.

the last ingredient in realization for the now.

this is the most beautiful day the world has ever presented my entity with,

and tomorrow, well the morrow shall wait up for me and give the next gift for mine eyes.

exitement inhales.

my words spill as the paint on your canvas.

i am my reality.

possibility.

A certain peace befalls us
As we stroll through these fields
Where the grass grows so high
I've been here before
It's where I played as a child
3 weeks every summer

I still smell the scent of the barn
That held home
To 16 cows
Here they cut off the horns
And feed them hormones
But not where I come from

Their warm coat colored brown and white
I still hear the lady call them out
Her voice echoes
Through the hallways of my memory.
Here we stopped being
The girls from the city

Each august it was time to harvest
We carried the pitch forks
In our small hands
To the fields where the tractors
Slowly drove by
Skin scratched open
From the insect bites

The burden of hay allergy
But we never loved it less
We caught mise in the barn
Build beds of hay blocks
Swam in the lakes
And took long walks

Toward the end of the cow's labor
With our bare hands
We aided the calf in to this world.
And watched their first steps
And offered them their first milk
We sighed from boredom
And screamed of exitement

There where the grass grows so high.

This mundane way life grows so tiresome
Not just for me, but for everyone
The constant repetition of everything
Wake up, go to work, come home
Eat, sleep, do it again the next day
It's so bland, so constricting
Where's the exitement?
I mean there's a whole world out there
A bunch of new experiences to be had
Unknown mysteries to explore
Yet here I am continuing this repetition
Maintaining the system that enslaves me

Yea, **** this
I'm not some **** robot
I'm a human, with a soul
Which yearns to explore the other facets of life

My existence is so much more than just a job

A loving relationship
doesn't just happen
It's not like flipping on a lightswitch


Commitment is a process
a wedding ceremony
A promise

Emotions may lead us
Though understanding, sharing our lives
Is hard work & compromise

Communication in dialogue
Is the key
Experiencing true love
Is our own

Love should start romantic
A gust of exitement sweeps us off our feet!
Naturally

The truest test of love
Will come from willingness
To share in the delights of life;
negotiating the bumps in the road

A mutual exchange of ideas,
any relationship
is the needs and experiences
of two people

Face misunderstanding
open and receptive with respect!

Navigate even the most difficult situations.
Take a deep breath, hold them
in a space of love,
Listen fully with all of your heart

A greater level
of personal transformation begins,
Learning powerful lessons
about ourselves.

Burning with an eternally educated mind.
Expressing her expansive thoughts with experience but not enthusiasm.
Enchanted by her eyes and energy to emphatise with excrements.
I hope she evaluates this a day in May.
Evidence of affection as the words he knows grows empty.
The extra effort and eager exitement from this enthusiastic male from Norway.
Her name is Ellie May.
Expressing my emotions to this damsel West of Maine.

Somewhere in the town I heard a strange humming lullaby
That I've never heard before
As my heart beat It made a match to her humming lullaby
Her presence was unexpected
Now I feel protected
Just by having her warmth

She is the only one that understands my story
My worries and my sorrows
She gives me a feeling that no one else can

Her touch is so, magical
And the beat of her gentle touch is so classical
While she places some kisses on my lips I'm so,
gentle to her because her fragile touch reminds me that she is the only one

Possesing every inch of me
She modifies my disposition with her magical hands
So I hit play and wind her back

When my world seems gloomy
She arrives with the sun
And slowly she tosses the sun rays Reminding me that every is alright
I lay back and give her control

She beats the pain out of me
When i turn on my speakers
Her carresing hands so sensitive begin to touch

Exitement and anticipation builds
I hold her tenderly in my arms
And sink slowly away in her lyrical pureness
On our ecstatic trip to paradise

She meets all of my needs
So i ****** to the beat,move every part of me
Moment of total bliss
As I explore every inch of her curves

With her its a perfect world
With smooth lines she serenades
Chanting sweetly about my prowess
Twirling and jingling with fondness

Falling for her allures
I perform the hardest contortions
Marinade myself in her positive vibes
My hands tight around her

Rhythm changes,
We go high ,we go low
then higher like shooting stars
Breathlessly till we ******
And start on the free fall

She is my shoulder to cry on
My molly to feel mellow
Her love spell is so powerful
She does all that I please

She hypnotises me with intense lyrics
Reminds me of lost passion
Future love and magic
As we move along in slow steps

A love song
She is there whenever I desire her
She is forever youthful and beautiful
Her tune is full of promises

She lights up my blues
Laughs with me and cries with me
Till the beats fade away
Carrying with them my pensive moods

When the sun kisses the sky for good night
She makes sure that tonight the sky is full of star's and with the moon

Laying in my bed room before I sleep
She wraps her arms around me
Till we fall asleep

All I need in this world is her glitter touch of her soul
And her glitter soul
Forever in my world

DET & Andrew Juma ©2016

Joy walked out of her house and pruned the roses in her yard.
She saw a tiny figure from afar. She wiped the sweat from her head and look ahead. Happy looked nervously at the house and beautiful Joy. Nervous acompanied him. He walked faster because he might spin and walk away, Scared also came. He bent on one knee when he was in front of Joy and said” will you Marry Me.” She looked at him with Exitement over her shoulder. Three years later Joy had two children , twins . She named one , Life and the Other,  Emotion.
The nurse named Mrs. Care Kindness laughed with Dr. Joke Humor as the two twins held each other on the table.”I guess Life is full of Emotion.”

I'm wondering, will I ever find my other halve? It's not an easy thing.
Someone who fittsw so well, like a hand in a glove. You always hope
for the perfect love. You have learned to live alone and you are getting
used to it. But the most beautiful thing is being together with someone.
Like two butterflies tasting the sweetness of life together. Walking the
path of life together. And never leave the other. Two souls filled with
love and brightness, thankfull that they found each other.
Yes, I hope it's going to worlk out that way. But I'm thankfull for the live
that's given to me and that I can do the things that I like to do.

I hope to find someone one day. Ain't we all longing for love.
I thank the heaven above. Something that lives out there, for the
protection that I get. And for all the love that I felt around me.
It feels like a priveledge that I experience it this way. Feeling a good
energy that's surrounding me. I have a good hope for the future, that
I can work on my goals. Finding my luck in the little things that can
make life so beautiful. Living in the here and now and not at the past.
And looking out for the future. The feeling that the best part of your life still has to come, and you can feel the exitement inside of you. Finding real love, a love that's meant to be. Together forever, me and you, a love that's true.

you've changed
you’re different
different than you were in september
they didn’t like that
they like you when your pliable
when you’re scared
when you pretend
pretend that your not holding in the tears
they like you only when you hate yourself

you took a razor to your skin
just to feel again
you didnt care if it was
l
o
   v
     e
      h
     a
    t
e
P
  A
      I
        N
but its not just poetry that can save you
its YOURS
the poetry filled with
l
o
   v
     e
      h
     a
    t
e
a
  p
     a
        t
          h
             y
and care for others more than yourself
because you think that nothing matters
but its only because you think Y O U dont
you comfort others
you let them
s                    c
  c                    
    r        ­            r
      e              
        a                    y
          m
while you keep yours inside
you let your tears flood your heart
not your eyes
you rob your vocal chords of the right to scream aloud
and you wonder why they dont notice

you hate her
you love her
you understand her
then you don’t
you share so much with your dads dog
and share so little
you understand why she bites
you understand why she barks
you understand she is dangerous
and why?
because you GET it
you GET her
and thats why you cant be mad
how can you get mad when you see something similar in the mirror?
what he did brought you both to a fork in the road
she chose anger
but you still get to choose
chose to be more than a number
a possession
a piece of property
chose who you waste your time on wisely
you dont get too much
so you stand in the road
to tempt time
                       d
                         e
                           a
                             t
                               h
just to feel powerful
but you’ve had the power
all of it
for so long
yet you chose to give it away
to the people
who know how to abuse it the worst

dear seven year old you,
the monster in your head is YOU
you’ve always been the only one in there
the real monsters wear masks
one’s that make them look human
humane
they “care”
until they have what they want

dear seven year old you,
don’t show the monsters your tears
show them your smiles
show them your laughs
cry only to the angels
the ones that wipe your tears
not cause them

dear seven year old you,
stopwishingstartdoing
startdoingstopwishing

never say “I can’t”
say “I won’t”
you CAN do anything
you just don’t have to
that’s the ‘beauty’ of life
you think you’re in a cage of titanium
when its really just weak metalic plastic
life is complex
it may be cruel, but otherwise would there be anything good alive?
And can you even see the good anymore?
you’re numb
you dont feel
not even the rough caress of the meds between your fingers

you want the clouds to float you away
you want change
something different
so you come seconds away from screaming it to the sky
but you don’t just want your body to move
I can tell
your soul wants to

you thank the darkness
not knowing which one you thank
the dark companion
ally
or the demon
the one with shadows of red that glint from the edges of your vision
everytime it comes around

i can tell you like haikus
probably because sometimes the most complicated of emotions
only need those three lines

you do things for approval
from  o t h e r s
exitement
of  o t h e r s
why not for yourself?
do you approve?
are you proud of you accomplishments?
what extent would you go for yourself?
is it the same as the extent for others?

i s  i t?

if there are lies to smell
why are you there?
if there is anger to hear
why are you there?
if you are made to wonder your worth
why?
are?
you?
t  h   e     r        e?
?

you ask
“do you ever feel like a bug”
yes
The ants are killed
The butterflies worshipped
But even the butterflies were once caterpillars
And an ant can carry the weight of the world
You think you need an umbrella but you need to realize the water is shallow enough for you to stand
It’s not always raining
But you only pay attention when it is
You sky is trying to catch your
Attention
‘I’m here’
It’s there for the little girl in this confusing world
There for the girl out for her own blood
There for when she cries
It’s smiling as she dances through the night
And it hands her the stars
One
By
One
It’s healing her clipped wings
Raising her to the sky
And letting her go
Wondering where she’ll fly

The rules are simple
Yet they don’t listen
They crack at her
And hurt her
But she’s made of the strongest of obsidian
For who else could you have gotten it from?

This may all be a book
But it might not be
I can’t prove it
No one can
But you can choose to make it one
Because we ARE all under the same sky
Though some are forced into endless night
And some ****** into perpetual day
We all look up from the same earth
And feel the same wind
We hear the same music
But feel different things
Because we ARE different
Because we are unique

You say the snow is cold
Though I’ve never felt it
I can say for certain
You can find the warmth
For even in hearts of pure ice
There is a soul with ravishing fire
A soul that won’t ever need a star
They don’t leave
It’s the difference between wired and wireless
You may not see the connection anymore
But you still hear the music
You are a beautiful color that most cannot see
You can’t be simplified into generic
Reds
Blues
And Greens
You ARE the painter
It was always your story from the start
The pity is that lots of people won’t see it as a work of art
It may be a massacre
A bloodbath of anger
Joy
Resentment
Apathy
Love
Hate
But it’s YOU
And someday
Someone will hang the painting up on the mantle

There will always be a price
Nothing but your smile is free
Though you are tired
But can’t sleep
Though your head is riddled with pain
Though you question everything
Trust the process
It won’t be for nothing
That little oval can’t do anything
It can’t taunt
It can’t comfort
Your captain isn’t evil
It’s confused
It’s blind
The little workers sent are not there to take your captain down
They’re there to show it the meaning of left and right
The meaning of right and wrong
You captain is your inner child
And the poor girl knows nothing at all
You were never meant to fit in
Nobody was
We are all born original
But so many force themselves to become copies
You are a color people cannot see
Because we can’t see all the colors there are
You are a color people cannot see
But they can all feel it’s beauty
We are all wanderers
And we’re doing the same
Broken glass
It rips skin apart
Fiber
From
Fiber
As red oil ripples over your finger tips
The smooth pads of your thumbs
You thought they were grown
But nobody is
We’re all children
Desperately needing to be loved
But some people hide it better
Hide the darkness in themselves
They beg someone to turn on the light
But wonder if the light will push away the dark
It’s not the dark you want to leave
It’s the monsters that lurk
You wonder if the monsters fear the light like you fear the dark
So you walk with your head held high
Your not scared of people anymore
You’ve seen REAL monsters
The fake ones don’t matter anymore
Though they still make you scream
In your head
It echos through your ears
You want to claw at your skull and ask
Why?
Why can’t they hear it?
Because they can’t hear you over their own

Though the stars may burst
And
Though the sky may scream
Who are we to rob Mother Nature of her anger?
Of her tears?
She may be a mother
But she is still in her teenage years
Let her cry
Let her anger
She is miserable
Just like us sometimes
Your poetry will not be forgotten
I can recite it word for word
I can’t speak for anyone but myself
But
They’ve burrowed into my head
Become one with my heart
You don’t need to unwrap vine
By vine
By vine
Cut them
Rip them to shreds
Stem from stem
Don’t give them anything
THEY’RE the problem
You WILL feel better

Your lungs fight for air
Your heart pounds for blood
You WON’T die
Your stronger than it
Stronger than the overwhelming
Strong enough
T o

B r e a k

I t

D o w n
Don’t ASK anxiety
Take it
Take your fun
Relax
Breathe
Smile
Calm
Life
Mind
Kind
They don’t belong to anxiety
They belong to you
They ask why you don’t believe a word they say You know why
But always remember
A lie
Is always
Twisted
Around
The
Truth
You’ve changed
Different than you were in September
But guess what?
We all love you
No
Matter
What
To Liana

A web of hidden creatures
Approach our feeble senses
We are innocent and full of exitement
Fill our riches and desires
To reach our full potential
Spread our news far and
Wide, we seek enlightment
Seceret letters and messages
Sent out of great importance
We seek a new God, a new lord
Keep our spirits fed and full of light
Create a community and discover..
Discover our lost hidden kept secrets..
A journey towards the abyss we find answers
Cut away the ego and glance forward..
Forward to our never ending dawn..
The Beauty of Death, The lust of love's lips
Kiss me and draw near our breathe..
Fruit of Life..
Corpse of Death..
Treasure of gold..
Follow me,
Follow me,
Follow me,
To seek my lost steps
Beneath the fallen glass
Witness our brand new God.