Suffocated by agony, dazed with confusion
Stuck in reality, that I'd druther be an illusion
Skinned alive, right straight down to raw emotion
Not a save harbor to be found, on my life's raging ocean
A living oxymoron, I'm raw to the touch but inside hollow
How much more will I be forced to swollow

I must be looking mighty strong
See the universe, keep piling it on
Can't anybody at all tell
Still in the middle of my living hell
Birds tweeting like nothings wrong
Mocking me with their sweet song

How much longer will I stand in front of life's curtain
Knowing only pain and sorrow are for certain
Drowning in the deepest darkest grief
Innocence, love, joy, and sanity, stolen by the thief
How much longer will it be till that final decision
Before it's made, that final incision

I must be looking mighty strong
See the universe, keep piling it on
Can't anybody at all tell
Still in the middle of my living hell
Birds tweeting like nothings wrong
Mocking me with their sweet song

Only a shadow of what I could of been
Being made to atone for mine and other's sin
I've tasted on my lips everything that could mar
Inside and out I wear the battle scars
Should I step behind the final veil
Slice myself out if this prison cell


©Pauline Russell

it wasn't my intention
to be this far apart
i'm craving a connection
but i don't know where to start

too precious to ignore
too gorgeous to forget
it burns so much it's sore
but it won't destroy me yet

just know i think about you
every day
and all i wanna tell you
is that i'm okay
and that i'm sorry
and that i don't know what to say

My Teardrops

If I showed you my teardrops, would you collect them like rain?
Store them in jars, and label them “Pain”.
Would you follow their tracks from my eyes down my cheeks, as I write the poems I'm too inarticulate to speak?.
Would you stop them with kisses,and,bring their flow to a halt?.
As you teach me that pain isn't always my fault.
Would you hold my face gently as you dry both my eyes?.
And whisper to me “You're too beautiful to cry”.
If I showed you my teardrops,
Would you show me your own?
Embracing my loneliness
Until I'm no longer alone?.


Randy McPeek