Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
I am just a concept.
shapes twisting, moving, changing,
taking on new and familiar forms,
fading and brightening, becoming new colors,
colors that may not even exist yet.
as one piece of me falls out of focus, another fills the void,
sometimes just shapes and colors, I'm unrecognized
other times, the shapes get smaller, more specific,
piecing together a collage of misshapen pieces,
ultimately giving the illusion of unity, of purpose.
i ask myself if how I'm seeing myself is how others do.
everyone pieces these shapes together differently,
creating a new being unique to them that i cannot precieve.
to them, i am those ideas, that shape,
and others can say what they see,
change what others see of me,
influence other's perception of myself.
to me, i am constantly changing,
constantly evolving,
the me that i can precieve is just a concept,
in that light i am just a thought, nothing more.
this was written before i knew i was trans. still one of my favorites.
I don't regret meeting you,
I just wish that I had knew,
what distance from you would do.

Even after just one date,
absence forms when it gets late,
wishing I could feel your weight.

My dream placed you in my arms,
we kept ourselves safe from harm,
you had me lost in your charm.

I awoke from paradise,
to find the room cold as ice,
you might be my truest vice.

Wishing you were really here,
I find a truth you should hear,
you make my fears disappear.

I've said my words, time is scant,
I'll wrap up my little rant,
Happy Birthday Arthur Grant.
Even if it can only end in tragedy, every moment I've known you has been filled with love in a way I never thought possible. I can't remember life without you, and being with you feels more right than anything else I've ever felt. The time we had on the bench proved that no matter where we are, you are my home. I love you.
> You must become.
> You have no say in the matter.
> Those with the power to stop this will not.
> They know not what weight this choice brings.
> They will decide with impartial data to burden you with their mistakes, their shortcomings, their biases.
> You have no say in the matter.
> A grieving daughter and a subpar son shall find distance in your becoming.
> A stage set by ignorant youth and buried hearts shall find it's star.
> You have no say in the matter.

> You must survive.
> You have no say in the matter.
> Degrees put to use to stop your violet hue.
> They know not what weight this choice holds.
> Willing servants to a wailing maiden pass the burden onto you.
> You have no say in the matter.
> A lonely mother and a vacant father shall regret the choice of your becoming.
> A spotlight stolen by short-lived innocence.
> You have no say in the matter.

> You must grow up.
> You have no say in the matter.
> A price unknown weighs on your heart.
> You know not why you live this way.
> With your incomplete knowledge you accept hate as love despite your lonely ways.
> You have no say in this matter.
> A quiet prince afraid of all faced with mature horrors for childhood dreams.
> A role far too complex for learning minds played expertly by gifted youth.
> You have no say in the matter.

> You must go back.
> You have no say in the matter.
> Her love's not real, you have a crush, perverted sons now break your trust.
> A prince now hides a princess true.
> For your age you seem mature, they sing your praise and demand more.
> You have no say in the matter.
> Your friends all leave, their parts played well.
> A spotlight shines, the show goes on.
> You find a way to have a say.

> You can't go on.
> You have a say in the matter.
> With frigid air you lie in wait.
> You know an uncle died this way.
> With swirling thoughts you pray for death, a broken kid with nothing left.
> You have a say in the matter.
> A friend's warm couch now cradles you while spotlights search and scan for you.
> A kindness shown sews hope into a plot too cruel for broken youth.
> You have a say in the matter.

> You can exist.
> You've had your say in the matter.
> A vacant room holds memories.
> Fighting wars for thirty years.
> Your knowledge says you're better off, you've found a home amongst your own.
> You've learned now that you can matter.
> A place away from rotten hearts, a brand new life is yours to start.
> A rhythm found beats day to day, you've found your voice and choose to stay.
>You've found a place where you matter.
Kinda more freeform than my other stuff, wanted to mess around with formatting.
Blair Devine Feb 3
A rock to build a home on lit
by lighthouse through the rain
Your snores my private lullaby
A sound to soothe my pain

The future doesnt matter
and the past weight heavily
Ill carry it forever if
You just stay here with me

Divinty isn't found in worship
But for you, I'll learn to play the bishop
I find no use in holy words or lands
but I found heaven with you in my hands
Blair Devine Feb 3
"Thank you for making these nights easier."
The words flowed from your lips over bitcrushed airwaves,
Your voice carried the weight of a broken sadness,
With the elegance and grace of the grandest choir.
A maggot finds its place on a beauty so divine,
Only able to destroy its own salvation as an act of worship.
Decaying flesh and bloating guts distort the truth of you,
A golden fawn bloomed into a king with a perfect crown,
But here you lie discraced on unholy ground.
Your blessing became my curse, so aware of my own inadequacies to be in your presence, desecrating all I touch for selfish needs.
And yet you speak such vile things.
Thanking me when everything ive ever touched as turned to rot.
Phantoms in my room blended with phantom harmonies,
The saturation in my chest eats every nerve alive,
How broken I must be for love to hurt this bad,
Vortex breaking up before its even fully formed by something so mundane as a tiny little snore
Blair Devine Feb 3
I'll never get used to the way that you treat me
The things that I've done were so harsh and i cant see
just what you see in me

Falling asleep you give praise, grace and kindness
Saying that I deserve this with your blindness
Of what I used to be

I dont deserve you, your kindness is not due
But even despite that i lie here with you
As you fall asleep

I hear your soft voice and i hold back my tears
The storms they have cleared for as long as you're here
I am yours to keep
this was written after falling asleep to the sound of your voice when I was still alone at night
Blair Devine Feb 2
I THINK IT’S TIME TO SPILL THE TRUTH
YOU NEVER LISTEN THOUGH, DO YOU?
YOU DEFEND YOUR FRAGILE EGO
BUT IT’S TIME FOR YOU TO KNOW

THE ROT YOU FORCED INSIDE MY MIND
WILL NEVER TRULY FADE OR DIE
YOU SCARRED MY HEART AND KILLED MY HOPE
NOW WASH YOUR MOUTH OUT, DRINK THAT SOAP

I KNOW THAT YOU WILL ALWAYS HATE
WHAT YOU CANNOT MANIPULATE
YOU ARE ROTTEN TO THE CORE
YOU ****** YOUR COUSIN, WORTHLESS *****

WARS WERE WAGED INSIDE MY MIND
I SEARCHED FOR PLACES I COULD HIDE
I FOUND SAFETY IN MY HEADPHONES
IT DROWNED THE CANCER IN MY BONES

IT’S NOT SLANDER THIS IS TRUTH
THE WORLD WILL FINALLY KNOW YOU
WERE MY ABUSER, GASLIGHTING
TRYING TO CHANGE WHAT I WOULD THINK

YOU HIT THE GAS UNLOCKED THE DOOR
TRYING TO PUSH ME TOWARDS THE FLOOR
THE PAVEMENT WOULD HAVE DONE THE TRICK
SHOVE MY FACE DOWN TILL MY SKIN STICKS

SCREAMING SHOUTING LOCKING DOORS
LEAVE ME OUT DURING THE STORM
BLAMED ME FOR WHAT YOU HAVE DONE
WHILE YOU TRIED TO **** YOUR SON

WELL HE HAS DIED HATING YOUR GUTS
CHOOSING TO **** HIS MIND OFF, BUT
YET I STAND HERE, WEARING HIS FLESH
I CAME BACK WRONG, A FAILED REFRESH

YOU’LL NEVER HEAR THIS ******* SONG
YOU MADE YOUR HATE CLEAR ALL ALONG
AT EVERY CHANCE YOU CUT ME DOWN
AND KEPT ME IN THAT ******* TOWN

WHEN ALL IS DONE, THE WAR IS THROUGH
I NEVER WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU
MY ****** MIGHT’VE ****** MY MIND
BUT YOU WERE WORSE BRENDA DEVINE
this started out with the intention of being lyrics but it kinda grew to be it's own thing. after 29 years of keeping my mouth shut, it's nice to let this all out.
Next page