The shovel bites shallow
as the dirt flies
and after a few cuts more
the earth yields its vein
the metal flashes again
with its angry face
and I know
I'll carve out a place
somewhere, deeper still
until nothing of this world remains.

Alone in the coliseum
the dust swept cage
I hear the lions come
all people of wealth
add to the roar of the crowd
I offer a silent prayer
in order to drown out the beasts
the terrible gnashing of teeth
persecution offered as entertainment
an execution becomes spectacle
and my only crime is belief.

I've lied once
I lie now
I'm venomous
I'll show you how
Come in close
Don't look away
Illusions dance
Creations dream
Gods can't die
But they can scream
So many pretty things
Block your way
Now I've done my trick
And here you'll stay.

What more could you
possibly take from me?

I whispered into the darkness
and shivered as it answered back

Your years
it yawned oddly

loved ones
it grinned madly

and happiness
it laughed dryly

I shuddered and drew back
at hearing its replies
suddenly my world
turned black.

I hurled a freshly lit match
and saw its form ablaze

I finally found my own voice
and yelled
seeking to make the woods
come alive
with my own spark of madness.

The bruises that adorn your skin
tell me why you don't let me in
that stare tells me what you've seen
from the perspective of a human being
although you avoided my gaze
and ignored my greeting too
the brokenness of me
reaches out for the brokenness in you.

I woke in a sweat
to the sounds of screams
at 3am
with shaking hands & ringing ears
I couldn't close my eyes again.

A women's distress
just outside the window
sobered and terrified me
leaving me
in a ghostly state
determined to visit each room
and count each sleeping head.

This call of the wild
from fox to fisher cat
how the shrill beckoning of nature
reaches and echoes everywhere
peering out to the woods
it is only fitting that this man
be deemed the real intruder.

Sometimes
I don't want to breathe
but I still do
just to spite myself.

Making each morning
the remainder of questions
and the child
I know nothing about.