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 Sep 2018 Napolis
imperfectwords
"I can see my door, my bed, my window, my chair, and my table.

"I can feel my spine against the wall, my feet against the floor, my jaw tightly shut, and my fingernails buried in my arms.

"I can hear the wind coming in from the open window, my heartbeat rapidly thumping, and that familiar voice in my head, shouting once again.

"I can smell the dampness of the ground outside as the breeze carries it to my room, and the sickly sweet odor from the soap used on my hands.

"I can ******* blood spilling from the bite in my lip; my last harsh reminder that
        I
        am      
        still
        alive.
When you call a suicide prevention hotline, they will often ask you to describe to them 5 things you can see, 4 things you can feel, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste to help ease anxiety. I hope this poem helps someone struggling to look forward, because believe me, it does get better.
 Sep 2018 Napolis
Lvice
The most intimate
Thing I have ever felt was
The sharing of prayers.

The happiness and well being
Of each other  a common
Wish between us.

I've never felt
So close to you my
Dear one.
 Sep 2018 Napolis
eileen
It's six in the morning
I've woken up

You were in my dreams
I should go back to sleep

Try to chase the dream back
inside my head

I don't want to think of you
subconciously

I don't want to think
You'll be with me

I can't hold onto a dream
forever

The sun is slowly rising
let me sleep

// dream of you
one last time
 Sep 2018 Napolis
eileen
It's 23:11
I know we all feel lonely
And depressed

I've never asked anyone to hold me
I let the stress drown inside me

It's almost midnight
I know we don't feel right

I write for me

I'll show you
the worst of me

Give me the best of you


It's 23:12

No more wishes
no more empty dreams

There's a hole in my heart
I have to fill

We're all lonely

It's never a loving feeling
 Sep 2018 Napolis
eileen
sober
 Sep 2018 Napolis
eileen
when you became it all for me
I never took a glance back
what was I missing

keep your thoughts on me
there isn't anyone else

you've forgotten
everything I made you feel

crying out for help
the sun is half

I love you so much
I can't look at anyone the same

I'm sober
dreaming the pain away

half of the sun is up
the other half is yours

I just want you to ask for me
come back and see me

I love you
I'll never forget

trying to let the feelings fall away

I never looked back
never blinked an eye

now I'm regretting
our last goodbye

I love someone
who doesn't love me the same way
it's to late to say sorry
 Sep 2018 Napolis
blackbiird
On Purpose

I kissed you without permission—
In hopes that you would kiss me back.
I was open with you—
In hopes that you would be open with me.

I waited in the rain on that cold December night---
In hopes that you would pick me up.
I wrote you 365 letters every day for a year.
In hopes that you would write me back.

I loved you on purpose—
In hopes that you would love me back.
I fought with you on purpose—
Hoping you would fight back.

Three years have passed since our last phone call.
You have probably moved on—
Yet I sit in this empty room,
Wondering why I loved you on purpose.
 Sep 2018 Napolis
Kevin
find me a cave that I can crawl into
so that I may not see the light on your face again.
take me into the dark where dew and dank
cover-all and seep between the rest.

won't you let me dream?
won't you let me sleep?
dear, this here, will not suffice.
show me those blues or I will become that hermit.

bearded and away in the mountains,
unaware of my appearance more than hair and stench.
distant, both in mind and body, purposefully so.
please dear, find me a cave or let me to crawl into you.

I am warmer than the fire I can make
I can feed you more than the meal placed on your plate
you know my heart is heavy with the weight of love for you
so make me that cave I may crawl into
radiohead- daydreaming
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