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  Sep 2018 Spiralize
Nobody
Lying here reminiscing about the time we had,
you made me smile and my heart fluttered in my chest.
I think how nobody can make me laugh anymore,
but imagining about the past never helps
or the constant daydreams of death, I keep to myself.
I’m so restless from wrestling with these thoughts in my head,
they're too loud and piercing, paralyzing me to my bed.
I’m busy listening to the soothing whispers, that all want me dead.
Looking for the coast to be clear, so I don't have to be fake again.
Since the mumblings remain, to sting and heighten all the pain.
I try and write out the disturbing sounds to keep them at bay,
waiting for the right moment to come when I can drain my brain.
Spiralize Sep 2018
Shining,
As it's always been
Glowing,
For the world to see
Crystal ball,
I have been admiring
In the light,
Paths are shown..

Standing,
The king looks old
Rays of light,
Passing through him
Adorning,
Crown he's been gifted
In the light,
Paths are shown..

Dark clouds,
Cover the light
The winds,
Push them away
Sliver of light,
Comes blazing again
In the light,
Paths are shown...
Spiralize Sep 2018
Standing by the shallow waters I stare
Sun is shining but no shadow is visible
The other side has something unknow
But I feel too weak to sail my boat..

What I might find I am not aware
The first push I give is crucial
The Mast is broken,wind sail is torn
As I felt a spear down my throat..

Cross these waters before the thunders
But why am I afraid of them now?
Let the wind sail the ship home
Take me to the place unknown..

Random things at random times
Is a symptom. We have to adapt
Weak heart has an ego to be killed
Mosaic minds have to be willed...
Spiralize Aug 2018
Despair watches me as I smile
Waiting for the moment, silently
One moment of tranquillity I find
Pounces on me like a demon
Devouring the intrails of me
As it slowly poisons my mind
To be fed by it or to feed it
I surrender to it, a rotten apple.

Despair watches me as I try smiling again
This time I have a wild thought
Do I surrender again as I did before
Or try to control the urge to lose
To lose the balance in me for a while
Or Just let it pass like how I tried before
Am Trying very hard to be ignored
But the demon is strong, devours me..

Despair watches me as I cry
This time I let it watch me crying alone
Lost all hopes of being a better man
All the lost thoughts come crawling again
Within me I lost the light I had found
Outside it was grey at the moment
Crying with a smile I searched for it
I found my lost name. I am. Despair...
Spiralize Aug 2018
All my life I have been searching for peace,
Never knew where to begin
Looking at this chaotic world
Those inner demons wont let me be.

They make me ****. **** myself.
They make me blunt to the world I live in.
They make me lose. And I lost my sleep.
Got used to it. Now I've dived in deep.

All the regrets I've had in me,
Demons enjoyed the withered me,
Day is my foe oh I hate the light,
Embrace the darkness.I couldn't fight.

People around me, make me feel
No more love for the world to heal
Now I have a friend. My best friend
It Took me there where I begin.

I ve been looking for you all around,
Oh Solitude! You keep me on ground.
You are a friend. My best friend
Please carry me till the end.

Solitude is an emotion...
Something that they won't understand.
Demons in me come crashing in.
Oh Human! You are a sin.

Diving in this huge ocean of regret,
Setting sail to find a land.
Faraway there is a sight,
Oh! But I hate the light.

— The End —