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Unfailingly unsure and uneasy at the thought of a God but I begged the sky for direction last night.
Bawling on the shoulder of the Big Dipper like it's my long lost mother,
biding my time for an answer and scrutinizing for a sign,
I still can hear nothing in return.
I'm prying open it's mouth to hear it say that I am not bad and I am not slipping away
but she is silent and
I can feel that I am.
Looking down towards the ground I cannot help but think that
this is the fate that my stars have left me;
between home and where I live.
SO I SURRENDER.
I'm giving up the bottle before the bottle gives up on me.
Wanting something more than the intoxicated chemical romances and I've grown sick and tired of chewing people up and spitting them back out.
Wanting something more for my own sake because I don't want to be a good for nothing any further and I've grown sick and tired of killing myself just like you've killed me in your brain.
Unfailingly unsure and uneasy at the thought of "Me" but I begged the sky for direction last night.
Her mind is like a universe.
She's a soul,
but still a human first.
To be whole,
she must grow from birth.
Till her last day,
she's here to learn.
Here to earn,
and not return.
The bad, she's had.
The goods in turn.
Her heart could burn,
and shouldn't work.
I’ll spark the flame,
it couldn’t hurt.
The stars don't fall,
they shoot at earth.
I'm the future of what’s new to her.
Beauty oozes from her humor,
but she’s a rebel just like Lucifer.
She’s the Devil, level nuclear.
Her presence, omnipresent.

*Represented by a ruler fueling
love* like it’s a weapon.
I wish I never fell for you
Hands on my chest to keep my heart from jumping out
Your name your being you're all I want to talk about
But I don't get it, you don't even flinch
Life's hard for you and harder for me since
You said my name and we shared a kiss
I am pushed aside because of someone else
My eyes stray while you have your way
All I want to do before you leave is say
I wish I never fell for you
I spoke and my words along with me started to fade away
Nothing more or less than a gentle sea breeze
Never to be seen but always to be heard
We can feel each other but you'll never find me
Your heart could pretend to love me
I know you're cold
I smell nice and your skin so soft
Getting off track but that's what eternity does to you
My mind hasn't gone it's just occupied by the changes in the ocean
Of your emotion and impossible to read chicken scratch personality
I've lost it all but go with the flow so you know even though
I'm not around all the time I still feel the want to touch
Your life don't forget me I love you very much
Inhale the courage to exhale my name
and one day I might breeze passed you again
Living life in flashbacks with memories on repeat of the times that we could have had just you and me you say that you miss me and want to be closer but anytime I ask you never come over that's okay another day I said and it's been the same forever inside my head
My eyes really open up to know the world will go on without me
I'm stuck living life from check to check and mirror to selfie
What is this world of self admiration without self confidence?
A fake sense of belonging for a measly thumbs up and a "share"
Funny to know that most of the time we all don't care
Conscious and worried in the back of our mind
Love me notice me be with me it all rushes in
This fear of being alone come about through wires not connected to our brain
Never have I felt such a rush from reading characters
and to think you have no idea if I've ever read a book or not
Take a second and think about that thought
A sign of freedom and letting loose
Rebellion slowly forming a noose
Sit back and watch your future fade
While you're stuck making minimum wage
To all his own metaphorically speaking
Doesn't take a cry for help to see you freaking
Out and about you still return to the scene
Like nothing else matters and no in between
Coming down from a hangover like no ones business
When the future come you won't be missed
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