behind those impenetrable barrier
i saw a beautiful  man wearing black
his face is veiled by white cloth
he seems so lost
the stained blood in his veiled cheek
like he cry a thousand droplets of blood
the dulled in his eyes and the gloomy of the place
i aim to touched and smashed those invisible walls
with the mighty of my own hand
but not even my entire power can resist!
only you can shatter those walls if you're at inside
i attempted to shout at him
'help yourself darling!'
but not even my powerful voice
could penetrated those barriers
i cried at his painful situation
to my horror
he stares at me!
with his icy cold stare
he smiles!
those smile...
i remember those smiles i used to have
he slowly walks into my direction
and touched those invisible barriers
but he didn't attempted to fractured those walls
he talks but i can't comprehend what he whispered
i follow the move on his lips saying
'it's okay. i'm okay here'
he smile again
those painful smile
slowly, he unveiled his face
but what frightened me are
his face!
his looks!
that is me!
what's going on?!
i felt dizzy
maybe my mind is tricking on me!
slowly, my vision became blurry
drifting away in this melancholic place

i black out

©IGMS

The truth?
The truth is that he was only beautiful when he was on drugs
So, he was almost always beautiful
No
He was almost always gorgeous
But it didn't matter.
He'd never get high enough to touch heaven
The holes he poked in his arms wouldn't fill the hole in his life
Nothing he could ever say would un-cry my tears, un-shoot those bullets, or un-break our hearts
Running away wouldn't make that one life-ruining ***** cell do a backstroke
He was beautiful when he was on drugs
But he wasn't on drugs when that little stick turned pink
He wasn't on drugs when I walked in and out of that clinic alone
He wasn't on drugs when I had to sit down and tell his parents and mine that there was no more "baby"
No
He wasn't on drugs
​He just wasn't there.