Right off the top
Here are my thoughts
They are as fresh to me
As they are to you


They are revealing themselves to me
As I write them to you
So here it goes
The raw unspoken truth


I have fallen short in my days
Repeat offender, I have greatly sinned


I have suppressed my darkest secrets
Secrets that rot within


I have blamed others for my pain
Pain that I was owed by my friend Karma


Pain that I was built to endure
Pain that I wore like shiny, heavy armor


I fought and battled with depression
Depression that almost did me in


I fell out of love with myself
Fell into lust and sin


I gave my all to another being
Depleted and reduced myself to nothing


I gave myself to those undeserving
Confusing lusting with loving


I prided myself on my success
But never acknowledged my God given purpose


I refueled my emptiness with ***
You can touch me here, but my heart, can't touch this


But here I am at the cross roads
My soul torn between who I am
Who I want to be
And who I was meant to


Each path requires me to make decisions
Continue on towards destruction
Turn towards what I want and away from God's will
Or acknowledge my purpose and change my mental


I believe in this very moment I have decided
By acknowledging my faults
I am already working towards the better


For the world, I have published my truth
I am working towards redemption
Letter by letter


Now that we have arrived at my rebirth
Blessings upon me, God will bestow


For I have unblocked my energy and cleansed my soul
For through my poetic vessel, God's glory can now flow