flowers left unseen
even if my prescense is unseen
i wonder for the reasons to bleed
to think of all there is to see
to know the unlimitedness of it all

back here again
before work
to write in skeptical delight
to know and hold my ground tight
the grip doesn't soften

awaiting for my shift to start
gather myself in my car
reflecting on today and the hw left undone
i dont' get this **** for ****

one day, it'll come together
without the people of today

and the thoughts that followed

out of my way
you ponder in my doubts to portray
a side of me that never wins a game

around the space there’s fragility
If I break will I

come to my senses?

to seek for love is to seek for denial in the obvious of wrong times

used to share our lives and now it’s just too unsettling
Should of thought of me when I was trembling
To foresee what we didn’t know
Like we should to begin with
In the terrors of my mind I hear shrieks to add some tension

the mess has been swept
the tears have been wept
i no longer long for greater length of our days together
to sleep, to be alive
to breathe, to attend today
moving my body
in and out the store
in and out the gym
in and out my room
in and out your life
only to have memory of all places and minds i've been
the doors are shutting, and I'm waiting for somebody to come out the "other" side
but they are clueless
the imagination is broken
and the train tracks have rusted
the destination is blocked
thank all of your thoughts

to oversee

to "feel" neglect on some kind of truth

the one that makes you go crazy

whatever it is

it's beautiful with you

but i shook hands with an end i couldn't accept

on to the next i guess

i can't bare with the unknown regarding you



another sip
to numb my lips




imagining the possiblity of us

desiring trust from myself

can't dwell in the hell i've created for my health

living to overcome the previous days

a transit to a better tomorrow

a mentality to try and follow

for no reason but satisfation with ones self

why would i ever want to satisfy my "SELF"?

"i" shouldn't need you, this longing is at war with my being

various traits to become alligned with

to make up who we are and what we want to be

in time

ways of patience

practice


in the stream of dedication
initiation is tricky
a little iffy

everything we used to be has ended

left my side 2b free

my mind aches so ******* much
i know it's easier to simply "be"
the story started to end when I thought this love wouldn't fade

no hope from the start

for the next person, there's no love to spare

time away

it'll just fly

like the 3 years i'll deny ever happened

pour myself away

to observe all that I "am"

the memories of you aren't "now"

it's a hard thing to accept

gone with the love we both portrayed

until it fades and decays

in time we'll heal and say
          we've learned from the tragedies

      fall for oppositions

that's the first sign...

we were blind.... in denial
or is that just how I see right now?

achieve the moment of being alone

only to know, that's what I always was

to think you were the only one


the fights just leave us in distress

to know I'm no longer harming you

vice versa

the happier I seem to be

undenianiably memorable segment of our lives

to look back and still feel and know love... or what it could

be....

the unlimitedness of it

to know I do, doesn't matter if you do
is enough for

me.

when the autumn ends

will be we passed ammends?

doge the

                     pain.....

to get
           hit from another direction

i'll just fall.....

and get up again

don't you worry






           about David

when it all goes to ****
and the chemicals don’t hit
Remember
you’ve always been the one to control your will to quit
And you’re still here
even when your life is smeared
and there’s nowhere else to steer
there’s still a move to be played
early or late
those who face themselves
aren’t ones to be betrayed

it makes sense
A tad tense from a day that don’t require two cents
Seeing from a different lense

this is the end
A poem to finish this off
For the memory
12:52 am
November 6
My day didn’t start so well
False dreams it seems
Sleeping in the closet
Feeling like a loser
A new beginning
Another end
No more time to spend
This time
All I can do is accept
The circumstances call for a few cries of denial
but the reason has been clear