III

I got a dog, Charlie
just in case you were wondering
I named her after you

I read a book
you always wanted me to do that
It was your favorite
I didn't understand a word
but for you, Charlie
I breathed every single sentence

I learned how to cook
every time I do
I cook a meal for two
you would've yelled at me
told me I was wasting food

I would've kissed you
to shut you up

it wasn't planned but
I finished college

you never stopped talking about it
it was going to be amazing
you said

but you never got the chance to find out
so I did it for you

it would've been better
if I did it with you

i met this girl
she's so much like you
but so different
but no

I killed you
so why should I forget about you?
why should I replace you?
she'll never replace you

I forgave them
those people who hurt you
I did it for you
but it would have been better
if I did it with you

I never forgave myself though

I sometimes find myself
wondering if I could be with you up there
but you always said that life was amazing
and you never got a chance to find out

so I'll do it for you

I love you
I miss you