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He cried like rain
And screamed like thunder

And I

I was a quiet river deafened by his storms
In 2019,
I want more.

Want more sunrises
More rolling out of bed with a purpose

More afternoons curled in a love seat

I want a garden
inside me and in my backyard

More friends
More nuzzles from dogs

More oceans

More allowance to make mistakes
After all, you were brave enough to try.

More stillness
More belly laughs
More love letters

More sway in my hips
Cool breeze on my lips

More looking in the mirror to see my smile
not the width of my thighs

More finding shapes in the clouds

More moments that leave me breathless

More life
All the painfully messy beautifully chaotic morsels
dripping from my chin

In 2019,
I want more.
Used for temporary results
And permanent trauma
I wrote it on my hands
I etched it to my soul
My happy place
Was taken away
Replaced with
His voice

But you're here
and you touched my hand
and made it all okay.

— The End —