Once you saw nothing but me
Now you look through me,
As if i was a ghost.

The icy cold fingers of sadness
Creep in touching my heart.
Taking me to the point where i feel
Nothing but cold and numb.
I dont want to feel this most of the
Time i am writing to forget.

Strength doesn't come from how
Many fights that you have had.
Strength comes from picking yourself up everytime you have fallen.

You make me feel everything
All at once.

I realise that my forever and your
Forever is not the same

Words can twist minds lifes
Get lost and ruined.
And the world becomes more
Darker and twisted.

I know that my head is full of dreams
And i get lost in my own world.
But there i am happy.
I can't spend all my days living in a black And white world.
Never smiling being serous all the
Time hiding who i am.
I love to get lost in dreams and be in a
World of own.
I love being a poet and if that makes
Me a dreamer then call me a
Dreamer.

I wish the pain would stop hurting feeling more and more alone.
All that's left are memories of the way things were between us.
Half written poems we never finished
An old notebook full of our thoughts.
No more late night pillow talks.
Now there will always be apart of me
That is missing.
Now we are worlds apart don't you go
And forget about me.
You'll always be in my heart.

I am a poet who has known
Pain joy and sorrow.
Cried many times tried to write
The pain away.
My hand is always in the clouds
Escaping into daydreams.
Because it's the only place that i ever
Seem to be happy.
But we can't live in dreams so i write
Poetry instead.

I lay awake staring at moon counting
Stars until i fall asleep.
Tears in my eyes why did i let you in
When you were never mine to love.
Your touch your gentle kiss the way you stole my breathe.
I can't sleep in a bed thats burning feeling things i have no right to feel.
Craving the sound of crys cutting through the darkness of night.
You left with my heart in your jar.

Everything seems to catch me in
The darkness of the night.
Counting stars until i fall alseep
While my mind trys to stop.
Staring at the moon lost in a crowd
Of thoughts and feelings.
Night doesn't always bring me comfort or rest.

Not everything i write is good
I write for myself.
My poems come from heartache
Pain and sorrow.
Most of my time is spent trying
To keep everything together.
Poetry is my mediation and my
Freedom rolled in one.
When i start to write everything feels
Less painful.
Writing to some people is more  
than just therapy.

I stop and stare at what society has become fake faceless and hateful.
Everyone wants a short cut or a quick fix without the hard work.
Basic skills lost the art of conversion is dead, try talking to someone who is lost their phone.
Ipads read the bedtime storise more percious moments lost.
Alexa is used more and more.
Society has made us feel we can't reach out, until we have reached crisis point.
Why don't we do anything for ourselfs anymore?.
Why do we chase perfection when its not real?.
Whats wrong with taking thr mask off a d just being ourselfs.

Love is love.
If it makes you happy and you have your happy ending long may it last.
Everyone deserves to be loved.

I have learned to careless about
What strangers think of me.
You will never make everyone happy
Love me ot hate it.
Put me down and i will get back up
And my life will go.
If i disappoint you thats only because
I won't live up to your expectations.
Never i will become part of this
Fake faceless and hateful society.
When you careless you live happy.

I am tierd of how confused my heart is everytime we talk.
Crying in the night wondering if i am
Losing my mind over you.
Can't you see how much it is killing
Me inside does it even matter to you?.
Laying on a tear soak pillow looking
At your name wondering, if should
Just press the delete buttom on you.
Yes my heart will break.
But your killing me everyday.

I stand by the window and wonder will the anxious thoughts stop?.
Trying to get through the day without using survival mode.
Tierd of fighting with my own mind everyday.
Feeling a depression thats crushs you.
Its easier to say i'm fine when all
You really want is a hand to hold.
Crying in the night so no one sees your tears writing the pain away.
I stand at the window hoping for a better and happier tomorrow.

My doctors asked if you don't write
Poems for them to be liked, and
Loved why do you do it?.
I write because it is better than popping pills, that will become invisible handcuff.
I can write the pain away and bury
Feelings in lines of poems.
Not everything i write is good maybe its stuff no one wants to read.
But if one person sees my poems and believe, theres a better tomorrow then
I helped someone.
A pen paper and words can heal more
Than what pills can heal.

It's 3:00am and I am still up writing
Poems about you.
Why are you growing on me now?
I can't get you out of my head.
Is it your icy blue eyes could it be
Your well tone masculine body?.
The way you keep it *******.
The way you give me a quick glance
And flash a smile at me.
My emotions are so confused and mixed up.

My eyes close and suddenly I am alone
With you in a beautiful dream.
I can't wake up because I want to stay
In this moment with you.
Feeling your lips pressed against mine
Feeling our bodies entwine
Becoming one.
Lost in every inch of a dreamful pleasure words just can't explain.
Wrapped up in your arms my heart is heavy.
Because when morning comes the dream is over.

Warm summer days sitting on the grass reading poetry books
feeling happy.
Thinking we had all the time in world
Breathing live back into my heart.
Walking bare foot on the grass you where the light in my darkness.
You found a beauty in me no one else could see.
You were the only one who understands me.
I can live without many things but
I couldn't live without you.

For years all you did was make
Me suffer over and over.
You put me down but you couldn't
Keep me down.
You hated how people liked me more
Than they liked you.
I never did anything but just be myself.
I am tierd of the lies you spread like butter on hot toast.
You smiled at me as you burn all
my notebooks one by one.
You can burn everything that I have.
But it doesn't change anything.
Because your still alone.
Hate me if you need to but it doesn't take the your pain away.
You will be the lonely troll who lives
Under a bridge I have had enough.

The tears.
The pain.
I love you.
I hate you.
You don't win.
I don't win.
No one wins.
Why do we keep doing this?.

It's late and I should be sleeping,
But the anxious thoughts won't let me.
I try to put a brave face on everything
And smile even when I am hurting.

I don't know why I feel this way or
Why I just feel like crying.
I can't always explain my thought when I don't understand them myself.

It's a beautiful day when all I want to do is just lock myself away.
I wish that I could feel so much different.

I wish the depression and anxiety would set me free.

Sometimes everything in my life
Feels like one big maze.
Full of twist turns and mostly dead ends.

I came looking for help I got silence
And a cold shoulder.
Watching faces hide behind mask spinning a Web of lies.
In darker times I sat alone without
A hand to hold.
Why come to me now when I don't need you.

My head is always in the clouds
Lost in day dreams.
Escaping the black and white reality
That I know so well.

Let me drown in the sea of your
inner beauty.
Let me touch the most broken
part of your heart
Come dance with me in the
warm summer rain.
Touch me under the silver moonlight make me long to taste your kiss.
Let me miss you every time you leave.

Some bridges need to be burnt and I
Lost the ones that need losing.
Now my dreams are full of colour and
My days are more happy.

I once looked at you like the stars looked at the moon.
Feeling as if there was nothing more beautiful than this moment, made with you.
Just as the last of the summer roses died so did you.
Until we meet again I will never give
My heart to anyone

I must confess I put my pen down not
Sure if I would write poetry again.
Took a step back took time out
Wondered what was next.

Sitting by the water watching as the
World passes me by.
I met a poet who said write what you
Feel not what people want to read.

The greatest poets of our time made
Mistakes and had haters.
Life brings you lovers and haters
But you keep writing.

Never stop doing what you love go home and just listen to your heart.

The crashing waves kisses the shore
Everytime they meet.
Never will there be another touch
That feels as good as yours.
Never will I hear anything as sweet
As your voice in my ear.
Not even the cool summer breeze feel as good as your fingertips on my skin.
I will never love again or give my
Heart to someone else.

Let me tell you one thing.
Your beautiful as you as are.
Your to strong too live hurt.
Please stop chasing one who keeps
Breaking your heart, you
Deserve so much more.
Don't care what strangers think
Care about the ones who love you.
Forget about finding the perfect picture and filter just be yourself.
Refuse to used by anyone.
If your not their first choice then they
Need to be shown the door.
You are enough and you
Deserve someone who wants to
Mend you heart and protect it.
Your special because your one
Of a kind.
You are more than enough.

Yesterday has gone and we
Can't control tomorrow.
Not everything will be in our control
Live in the here and now.
Because whatever happens it
Will happen.

The night scares me because I know
The anxious thoughts are waiting.
Waking up in a cold sweat crying.
The screams still haunt me.

Wishing that I could get out of the
Dark maze that's my mind.
If the doctor has a pill for long lasting happiness I would take it.

Everyone tells me your not meant to
Feel this at all and anxiety isn't real.
This is why I write in my notebook and don't talk to you at all.

Anxiety ruins your life come live in my head and then tell me it's not real.

Will I pretend to be happy so you
Can feel better?.
How many times have you said
This is last time?.

While everything is a game or an act
We are lift to pick up the pieces.
Beer cans and wine bottles every were
You ask why the angry face.

You say that your an adult you don't
Need told what to do.
Live in a ***** house drink yourself
To death I am past caring.

The day you crossed the line was
When you spit in my face.

My mind is numb and my heart
Feels more than one emotion.
I am good acting okay when i falling
Apart inside piece by piece.

I am scared of the night because
That's when the thoughts get me.
My mind has become a twisted maze
I want out of.

I wake up in a cold sweat crying
You can't be dead.
The bible says time heals wounds
But my wounds aren't healing.

Did heaven really need another angel?
Couldn't he have taken someone else?.

Yes I made a mistake wrote a few
Bad poems I want to forget.
Ready to move on picking up my pen
Listening to my heart as it speaks.

Met a poet who helpped me
With some wise words.
Picked up my pen and wrote again.
Started a new poetry class.

Found my way and found my voice
Learned something new.
Found a new love for the poetry
I almost never wrote again.

Now I am back at it with a new
Poetic voice and tone.

I have rock bottom hard.
Yes I have made mistakes and learn
Many lessons.
To all my readers thank you for the
Kinds words and support.
Never have I treated you like idoits
You have helped me grow.
Not ever poems of mine has been
Good enough to post.
I am not putting the pen down I
May take a break for awhile.
Thank you for making me the poet
That I am.

Let hate in swallow the poison destory
Life after life.
Cause as much pain as you dare tell lies make people cry.
While happiness is found and you watch as the world passes you by.
You'll be sitting alone unwanted and unloved.
Someday karma will bring you a kiss.

Would it be better to pen the down
And never write again?.
Some people have said no others
Have said do what you think
Is best.
I am not sure I know what to do.

Your heart is as black as the night sky.
Your eyes are colder than winter.
You let hate consum you.
Your the lonely one who is who crying
Without a hand to hold.

I could say a million hurtful things
But I won't.
Instead it's better not to react and
Just move on.
Sometimes it's better to walk away
Than let someone take a piece of you

My work is my own and it maybe
Always be good.
Hello poetry was a happy to go.
Now I am not so sure I want
To post anymore.

Is it wrong to be inspired by anything
That makes you write better.
Is it wrong to try and write something
Better.

It will hurt to say goodbye but
In the end it's for the best.
All good things must come to an end
Even you and me.
Go and forget me forever I hope
You find your happy ending.

I red something that said
If you can forgive you will heal.
If you let go you grow.
Now they words are stuck in my head.

Around my feet lay the ashes of the
Person I once was.
It made me smile because They said
I would never rise from the fire.

Heartless I am not
I just learned to use my mind more and use my heart less.

I make mistakes.
I laugh when I shouldn't.
Say stupid things then take it
All back.
No all my choices will be right.
I will fall many times.
I don't have all the answers.
I am not perfect.
But beauty can be found in the
Imperfect things.
That's what makes me real.