I never knew that this was a bone until you got skinny enough for me to see it
You're a skeleton with a layer of skin
How many ribs do you have?
I could count them
And your vertebrae...
I could count those too
Your skin hangs from your body
Trying to leave while you're still alive
You drag yourself around
On your ****
Hoping no one sees
How are you still alive?
When I can't see your heart beat
But I can see all the rest of your insides
Squirming to get free

It's 12:08
I'm still awake
Thinking and thinking
Making me brave
Not brave enough, I don't think
To tell
My
Secret

Kiss me
And tell me everything is going to be
Alright
Tell me
You love me
But don't lie
Actually mean it this time
I hope you mean it this time
If you don't love true
Walk away
Run if you have to
In the opposite direction in which
I do
Maybe I need you
I don't want to find out
So break all that we made
And stop lying

You grabbed some letters
Threw them into words
Stuffed them down my throat
And told me to sing
It's a terrible thing,
Making words into sentences
When they aren't your own
They came from you, not me,
Now take them back
But you won't
I'll be stuck with them
As I regurgitate your words
They burn up my throat
And come to life in my mouth
To be set free
Slippery and broken
Rattling through my teeth

What is the price of love when
All you get is ***
You think it's right and worth it
And that you love them
But it's not right
He's not the one
Neither is she
Why do we 'make love'
When the love should already be there
We call it this in hopes of connecting love and ***
But love is not that, it is made over years not minutes

I need something to hate myself for
But the truth is
I already have so much that I hate
About myself and what I've done
It's so easy
To make mistakes in this world
And after every mistake and lie
I feel myself begin to crack
Because
Of everything I hate
I will punish my mistakes with hate
For myself and only me
No one deserves the hate I have
For myself

My eyes leaking with salt water
Pain in my chest
A ball of clay jammed in my throat
I reach for you when I know
You are not there
I take your memory and rip it apart
Then scramble for the pieces
I want you here with me again
Bawlin on the floor I break and let it go
I push all that away from me
What has been locked up inside
But keep only one piece of you
Always inside of me
To sit and
Cry