Because alone
We're on our way
Every step we make
Can be a mistake

How to be confident
I wonder now
I was dellusional
I didn't know

There was a path before
And now it's gone
No silver lining anymore
No rolling stone

It's all in shards now
That's how it seems
I used to believe
Into realizing dreams.

Es tut mir so leid.
Ich fühle Bitterkeit.
Und unter Eitelkeit
Versteckt sich Angst und Neid.

Ich wünschte frei zu sein
Und freier noch zu denken.
Ich sehe meine Muster
Und will mich lieber ablenken.
Doch wünsche ich dir
Liebe.
Ich würde sie dir schenken.

Devastated
Caught
En-caged.
And inside me
Pure hate-rage.
I believe you,
You hurt, too.
But I was too naive,
Since I tried to believe.

1000 grains of sand in my throat
And I was so naive, yes so.
After being the most suspicious person
I chose to believe, to show my deep grief.

1500 grains in my mind,
All horrible assumptions reunite,
I gave in once again into the light,
It turned out to be buried in the night.

10.000 grains are heavy and cold,
They creep through my heart.
And I was so naive, yes so.
But I had to get hurt to finally let go.

Now, in the middle of the night
I have this urge to tell you
How much I love you
And how much I appreciate you being by my side as I am walking through life sometimes graciously and sometimes not.
I want you to experience more of my happiness
I'd like to share all of it with you.
I love that you are the one by my side when I am learning to trust and love life again.
Thank you.

It's ok to feel angry and to feel desperate about things.

It's ok to sometimes fall out of balance.
Out of flow like a leaf that gets stuck somewhere between branches or stones.
A minute ago this leaf was flying graciously like a butterfly but it lost its balance and got stuck. Squeezed between some objects.
Now it has to stop worrying. To look around and to breath. "Where am I?" it says. "A minute ago I was flying carelessly like a beautiful butterfly 🦋 and now...?" it thinks.
"It's ok to lose your balance sometimes" it hears an unfamiliar voice. "It happens so that you can stop and look around for a moment. It happens so that you can appreciate what is here now. Breath, relax. Soon enough you will fly again."

🙏

Or maybe... the balance gets restored when I lose my fast pace for a minute?