am I evil?
wanting illicit thrill
am I bad?

looking for my garters in satin
buying more stalkings
sheer as a good knife

plotting, planning, I must be
truly evil, sin is fun
feed me

darling
let us fill our lungs
with corruptive smoke
and descend into delirium
so we may appreciate the moments
when our breaths consist
of purely air

let us drown our stomachs with poison
so we may savor the potent mix
of acid and alcohol
searing our throats
and numbing our skin

let us sink our teeth
into the ripe flesh
of the forbidden fruit
and swallow the pit
while we´re at it

let us drink to forget
and kiss like careless strangers
as we bury ourselves under bodies
so we may feel something other
than the weight of the world

let us dance beneath a storm
not of rain
but of blood spilling out
of open wrists
with mouths gaping
and hearts shattered

let us relish these blurred eyes
and hazy memories
as our hands touch
but do not meet
let us hold each other too tight
skin bleeding into skin
nail marks freckling your back

i can no longer hear the music
so let us sing our beautiful lies
take my hand
and let us run through grayed streets
with reckless abandon
and as we go
we can pick the roses
allowing their thorns
to imprint new scars
between our fingertips

let us tear the feathers
from a white dove
so we may weave ourselves
wings to fly
to touch the sun
and steal icarus´ name

let us ignore our ambitions
and explore extremes together
let us shatter our expectations
and as two beings collide
let us breathe each other in
and indulge as if it were
our last moment on earth

darling
let us taste death together


x.

swallows fly in
fractured patterns: i stared
at the canopy

i bellowed your name
and sobbed; my dog
licked my face

faraway: i know your voice
rumbles with music.

when the wind hits in
gusts, it bleeds through my
jacket. we splatter to the soil,
churning towards an
unforgiving
sea.

then i see you: breath
catches in my throat.

i feel my soul
resounding upon you: sounds
of you, always. do i fool you with my
smile?

i know what i cannot
say: what i can never truly,
truly say:

i miss you i
miss you i miss
you i
miss you i

i bare my shoulders to the wind's chill.
i sit next to you on the car ride home.
i watch as shadows gather on your skin.
i pine for twilight after the sun sets—

and still hear you in the pine air
and still feel you in my pining breath
and still hold you in each pined sigh.

i don’t know why
her eyes
why she soars over plains
and mountainsides

almost
to hold me, almost to say
goodbye.

i don’t know why
her eyes
drown in moons,
puddle in the rain;

in my heart so tirelessly
reside.

unspeakable you:
outlined in charcoal,
shaded in graphite,

the world shifts when
you siphon your
pain.

the world whirs when
you call my name.

foggy inclines, green saplings
and pines: you always loved
the water.

you long for
elsewhere, but
the currents stirred and

you swept into the fir.