Renae

Renae Jul 2021

I teeth

Pointed and smooth
Each of them
Solid they sunk in
Only to find
a neck of steel
Now they're broken

Renae Jun 2021

Mosaic

I've learned I'm entirely
broken...
into tiny fragments.
I don't attempt
to pick up my pieces,
slicing my skin on sharp egdes.
I sat long in the mirror examined my colors... outstanding
my shine, not gone
perhaps not broken.
I said to myself
"I don't need to perfectly fit"
Somehow I'm still beautiful,
sharp, impossible...
I suppose the only thing
left to do is..
proudly place my pieces in cement

Renae Jun 2021

Am I worthy

All roads seem blocked
All exits taped off!
This and that
always get in the way
I ask and wonder and
I don't feel okay

Am I worthy??
As though
you should answer...
Are you?
Who am I to choose

There are hidden things
I cannot see
Your heart, your soul,
your memories
Your trauma, your fears,
Your meant to be's

That crashed and burned
broke your heart...

Who am I to think
you're too broken to restart?

Can I assume you
have no right to life?
That you're cursed
unloved & shouldn't
been born... right...

When I look in a mirror
I only see me
So I ask myself,
Am I worthy?
And then I answer,
most certainly.

#worth #selfworth #worthy #selfhelp

Renae Jun 2021

Speak

I don't understand
but I'm not worried
It's out of my hands
out of my hands

Been in motion for so long
it's not going to stop
I guess you shouldn't throw away what's written
Whether you want it or not

You can't change it
no matter how much you wish
You can't stop
what's been put in place
It's God's plan
you can't change it
for the Earth & for space

It's bigger than you
That's why it's a race
I'm in it too
Enduring
no matter what it takes

One mistake
won't take your life
even if you make it twice
Get back up and make it right
You already know
the consequence, like
Why ruin your life?

I'm not in competition
with nobody
I want you to win too
All I ask is
You want the same for me,
Don't you?

This war isn't mine
I have no choice
but I have faith
So I stand
with my heart
and my voice

Renae May 2021

The only light I see

I've seen the news
seen what's on TV
Listened to music
looked at you, looked at me
I learned
all about our history
The only light I see
is in the books,
songs & letters
written to you and me
They've survived
through centuries
telling us what's to be
No, anxiety can't get to me
I rest peacefully
my mind is at ease
for the illumination is
brighter than it used to be
The writing's on the wall
the picture is clear
It's never been easier to see
He cannot cheat,
he will not lie
There's no more time to cry
he will wipe every tear from our eyes

#jehovah #jesus #bible #truth #heart #love #loyalty

Renae Feb 2021

Be what I am

You and you and you
Pointing at me
Take a look at the three
Staring you back in your face
How could you know
the sound of my heartache?

Go ahead, shift the blame
Don't you understand?
I can only be what I am

I'm not exactly who you see
I'll never be what you want me to be
I'm not trying to please
Not anymore

Your tightrope broke
I fell but I didn't choke
After you left me high and dry
Your revenge is a joke
I never wanted to see you broke
lonely or unhappy....
Funny thing is
you wanted all of that for me

So go ahead, shift the blame
Don't you understand?
I can only be what I am

Renae Dec 2020

Gotta get back to me

I've been at
your beck & call
when all you wanted
was for me to fall
I picked you up
again and again
as you watched me
crawl, break & bend
For you
it was never enough
I couldn't carry it all
Like I'm nothing but tough
...as if your flaws were my own
the weight of you crushes
right down to my bones
I may be alone
Only my thoughts
to set me free
The comfort I have is
knowing me
Knowing exactly who I am
seeing through everything
helps me to understand
I gotta get back to me
Focus on what's at hand
Disappointment happens sidetracking
Chasing storms in the sand