I'm okay with nothing
I wasn't made for much
Always wanted to do something
but somethings never enough
So I turn into
my own little world
Still a sad little girl
Don't laugh at my pain
roll your eyes in my face
I know your watching me die
Inside and outside
alI I wanted was love
guess that was just too much
Intuition isn't such a gift
When you see so clearly
Can't pour from a empty cup
When you've only
become everybody's charity
Now they believe
they can be redeemed.
What am I here for
when all of this is
just make believe

I stretch my arms to the sky
and breathe in the soft rain
smells of wet concrete
this morning.
It's chilly but crisp out,
the suns rays warm my skin
I gaze hand over eyes at
blue bonnet blankets sewn in patches of green
freshly mowed grass.
Bluebirds sing their  happy songs
in the distance.
It must be spring.

Darling,
You were there for me,
I'm sorry I was such a mess.
I couldn't see you, for the fences and walls surrounding me.
The truth is I wouldn't have
been able to,  it didn't matter
As hard as you tried to love me,
I had to love me too.
I had never learned how
unfortunately
So when I said "I love you"
I loved you the same way I loved me,
so conditionally.