Sometimes I get so tired of feeling like a series of chemical reactions
Like once these electric pulses flow from my brain stem
through my wires of vessels and veins to the tips of my fingers
I am a puppet to the robotics of biology
Strung by my nerves and pulled by my emotions,
I cannot control these tears
Stupidity is merely short circuiting,
and maybe I just need to recharge
I think this taste in my mouth is acid;
my teeth are batteries leaking this energy
Onto my tongue and my lips
These are the loudest parts of this machine,
But each word, each kiss is not nearly as loud
As the programming in my mind
Maybe that's why I'm just a bunch of ****** gears and twisted cables
Because all this code of love and lust
Is a combination waiting to combust
And I feel unable to contain it

he told me about how ***** his family's money was
stocks under the table and
overcharging black girls
to pull out their babies
i told him he didn't reflect that at all,
and he said he tried to keep his head out of the clouds
as if what i'd said
had been a compliment
as if it wasn't my way of saying
he was too boring
to have a story like that.

what is love
to someone without
a heart.

And I should have joined a masquerade.
Believe me.
I wore masks all the time.

I slid the blade across my skin.
1 time.
2 times.
3 times.
So many times, actually.

Beautiful

Darling you are beautiful.
Not just ordinary-sort-of-beautiful either.
It's not for everyone to enjoy,
Tis not to everyone's taste,
But it is there:
Ineffable beauty.
And it begs to be loved.
I would do so gladly,
Tracing your face's outline
Like it is a piece of art work,
Or the full moon in the sky.
It is so specific. So very you:
Beauty like no other.
You can't see it sometimes
Because it hides behind your smile
And sits above your raised brows.
It likes to daydream at times
In the crooks of your curls,
And takes a nap on your nose.
As a master of disguise,
It plunges into your eyes,
And finds there warm sea water.
It is a little timid maybe,
But with a few kind thoughts
You could lure it out
Into your own
Observable universe.