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Aug 2014
Foul-mouthed parkers
Young and grown alike
Made for a productive day
A troublesome night

The residents to my right
Slandered behind me in fear
And that is when I cracked wide
Into a body of screams and tears

I cried
'Stop! Stop!'
'I can't take any more!'
My heart turning to glass
'I just want to be left alone!'
'Is that too much to ask!?'

This tragedy may not have been
If I had simply smiled their way
But all I did was drown them out
Until this fateful day

Little did I know
That they were watching me all year
Trying to find a way
To console me and my fears

But not once did I wish them well
Or turn to them for help
And so I brought this crushing ordeal
Entirely upon myself

And I cried
'Stop! Stop!'
'I can't take any more!'
My heart turning to glass
'I just want to be left alone!'
'Is that too much to ask!?'

This tragedy may not have been
If I had simply smiled their way
But all I did was drown them out
Until this fateful day

Then they held my hand
And reassured me on their knees
That they have someone dear to them
With the same troubles as me

Still this tragedy may not have been
If I had simply smiled their way
But all I did was drown them out
Until this fateful day
This may be my most emotional poem yet as it is based on a recent ordeal that befell upon me just a few hours ago; my first emotional breakdown since last year.

Feeling isolated by the delinquencies in my town as well as overhearing hurtful slander from my concerned next-door neighbors (what I perceived to be verbal threats of violence behind my back), I refused to take any more. I opened my front door screaming and tearfully begging them to stop talking about me and leave me alone forever.

This may never have happened if I had just been willing to trust them even the slightest. But I didn't trust them at all. Instead, I remained bitter and distrusting towards them thus bringing this ordeal upon myself.

Shortly after my first emotional outburst in a long time, one of the neighbors (a kind and understanding woman) knelt down on my doorstep to comfort and reassure me.

She informed me that she was hoping to find a way to comfort me ever since I moved in near them last year. All they wanted was for me to feel happy and safe living next door to her. But all I did up until now was push her and her family away from me.

She reassured me saying that she had a nephew with troubles similar to mine. More importantly, she promised that she and her family would genuinely mean me no harm as long as I trusted them from hereon in.

And so, after what seemed like a whole hour of total relapse, I finally agreed to trust them. Nothing may change significantly overnight, but I'll do my best to trust my neighbors from now on.

---

© Jordan Dean "Mystery" Ezekude
Jordan Dean Ezekude
Written by
Jordan Dean Ezekude  26/M/Eastleigh, England
(26/M/Eastleigh, England)   
  816
   ryn and Justin S Wampler
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