My parents keep asking me why I have not left my room
by @jessy-ivan-diaz
1. When I walk into the Emergency Room I know exactly what they're going to say, "Four years is a long time for a broken heart to heal" I guess they don't know how hard you hit it with your fist. So they stick me with a needle full of morphine and tell me, "This will help". It never does.
2. Dried lips and Swollen "I love you's" can make you feel again but god I don't want to feel anything if it means sitting here with my lungs filling up with fluids suffocating me while my ribs crack and splinter every fucking part of my body when she doesn't reply.
3. I told my Best friend I wanted to fall in love and he told me he would start writing my eulogy.
4. Words get stuck inside my bloodstream and their edges cut into my heart. I want to tell you how much I fucking miss you. I can't stop bleeding.
5. My mother always told me not to love someone with my entirety, because one night they'll turn off the lights and they'll take every fiber of me and forget come back to switch them back on.
6. There are over a thousand ways to kill yourself, hang yourself, burn the house with your body still in it, do too much heroin, bleed yourself dry, let the weight of stone where your heart used to be drag you down to the bottom of the lake. I think the most effective way is making love with someone whose name you'll never be able to say without shaking.
7. You don't burn in a fire. You just become a part of it. Your hair ignites like fireworks end, your bones turn into coals, and your eyes melt into the embers. They say that being burned alive is the worst pain you could experience they were telling the truth I should have been more careful around you and your words that lit me aflame. There was a lot of choking and burning and thrashing and darkness.
8. When I told you to sleep with me I didn't mean Leave come sunrise and forget what happened.
9. Maybe you should come over. Maybe I should change the locks. I think I love you again.
10. I stopped smoking because you could stop my hands from shaking just as well as a cheap pack of cigarettes but you rot my insides even worse.