here i am again
reaching for hands
i am commanded not to hold
dreaming of just
a whisper of your touch
and again i ache
a hollow space in your shape

haunting everywhere i go
i try not to search for you
dreading my impending doom
the moment i catch
even a glimpse of your ghost
mocking my mortality
and yet possessing all of me

and god help me
because i cannot help it
a willing captive
fully at your mercy
and i am afraid for my being
because even ensnared
i wish not to escape you

blinded by your light
i mistake you for heaven
i am waiting at your gates
saying all the prayers
begging you will bless me
with an eternity of your love
if only i were worthy

and here i weep
because what use is all this
i see you and i sigh
keep myself at arm's length
because it is not enough
and it will always be like this
i'm too much of a romantic
to see things clearly