Mum says “light a candle, burn some incense” but mum my inner sense is the only thing stopping me from burning myself to the ground because I can’t stand the light anymore.
Nan says “your'e too bright to be depressed” but the bright sparks that flicker of a memory that is dark, and the flame only reminds me that everybody I love is someday gonna die. But mum..... nan...... i’m not afraid of the dark, that’s the problem.
It’s hard to have fun when i don't feel like having fun. Don’t get me wrong it’s not that i don’t want to go to the party, I WANT to go to the party, but i’m stuck in an abusive relationship with depression and anxiety and they talk me out of going. Cancel plans last minute, making up a physical illness, because "sorry I'm too depressed to see u" sounds utterly ridiculous.