*I left a trail of breadcrumbs for your lips to find
but they were hungry for something I couldn’t create.
I was hiding in a place that wasn’t hard to find
and I just,
I just wanted someone to take the bait.
But when the time came that you caught me there wasn’t champagne, there wasn't bouquets- no.
I looked behind to tag you back but you were already ten steps in the other way.
And to me this was play
but to you it was probably just a game.
We were a picture that couldn’t fit into any frame
or a fire that couldn’t be contained, it was all the same.
Just like the very place you called pleasure became the same room I called pain.
I spent my entire life chasing shooting stars
thinking that I could make all my wishes come true,
stopping my feet here and there just to then try and
catch my breath.
I was always chasing but never very good at pacing.
I got battles with my mind erasing while my heart keeps retracing
and in that time
on the assembly line
they smacked me with a sticker that said, “Replacing”.
You see I was born with fingers that were small and stubby,
stretching out trying to grab the answers I would always come up short on.
My heart’s been known to skip beats but sometimes as it skips,
it gets caught on something and trips
head over heals down a black hole that swallows then spits
me into another time and place where you are stripped;
from sight misplace, but I still chase
because no one ever taught me how to land in space.
And if you took my legs I would crawl through wet concrete,
and if you took my arms I would roll to a mountain peak,
and if my body is taken this heart would still beat
because when you left that home
you forgot to turn off the radio
so all of our songs still play on repeat,
you can hear them through the walls and down my streets
where everyone else still hears it too
but I,
I was the idiot for giving my only set of keys to you.
I’ve spent my entire life trying to close gaps
that I probably had no business closing in the first place.
But even if I’m not the one who wins the race,
or finds the foot this glass slipper longs to embrace,
or catches a shooting star flying in cold space
I know that being here is better than being there,
that living today is better than dying tomorrow,
and even if,
even if these tiny talking hands never get a reply
that it sure beat the hell out of never giving it a try.*