A dance of pull and push back
A fist encircling a heart
Clutching, Squeezing
Power on one side
Pleading on the other
Out of control
My stomach feels sick
My mind blank
Grasping toward where you were
Spirling into past comforts
Delusional daydreams
Days become memories as they happen
Irrefutable anger
Violence on the body
A mind of blame and contortion
You lay out boxes I can’t fit into
Telling me to get in
I can’t breathe, but you tell me to melt like water and flow.
All I ever wanted was some pull from you
Acceptance and patience of my becoming
But all you know how to do is push back.