This isnt very good its a mess but lately ive been so numb i csnt describe how awful my mind has gotten. Ive been depressee my whole life but it's like it all is releasing lately. Im seeing things differently and Ive been hating some people for what they've done to me. I'm growing but I'm reaply ****** up and some others i know are too. And I've hated myself so much indidnt realize how deep it went. Ive bever been so hopeless and so angry and so suicidal before. Ive tried to **** myselfs many times recently. Yet in these dark moments i felt like it...was okay? I felt a small shimmrr of hope. Like this was the right tbing finally. Because now im seeing things differently. I'm seeing how love really is amd how much i should love myself. Because theree nothing wrong with me and never was. So lany people everyone has abused me and put me down. Ive been living life thisnway. Thinking i don't deserve ti exist thinking im stupid, thinkinh im not good enough for anyhting or compared to anyone. Im worth less. And everyone telles me this . when soemone tells me its not true amd they see my worth i necer really beleived them. I listened to the abuse. Idk why i see it now but i do. Those bullies truly were only insecure about themselves. So wanted to bring me down. Im human and I'm beautiful inside and out. I'm not perfect and that's okay. I will grow and i will learn to love and help others again but fjrst i must learn that i can love myself and stop crying all alone in the corner.

And so can all of you. I don't care if its your dad or your lover or whoever don't let them tell you that you don't shine, because you do. Love yourself everyone. Please.