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Apr 2018
State of my mind; I can barely breathe,
I want to control my chest but I sleep,
Shouldn't love amount to more than just words we speak?
Trying to connect, show the world I'm not weak.
Bad surprises lurk on a somber ledge,
Most find revenge in a simple sharp edge,
The majority of mankind is actually dead,
Living headaches feasting on misinformation they're fed,
I aim to stop this deceit, coax it to an end,
Intelligence is a worthy value to defend.
I can't trust my own feelings I've found,
I know I am foolish, but I sound profound,
I am completely hardened, I need help now,
Want to take off all armor, but I don't know how.
Never been with somebody who actually stayed,
Even the best left me feeling betrayed,
I tried but I was stabbed in the back where I laid,
I wish my life were a card I could give away or trade.

HOOK:
Life is a game I always lose,
Wrong decisions I can't help but choose,
All I want to do is improve,
And go forward but I can't seem to move.

9:30 PM I texted my friends,
With the same question, I know how this ends,
"Want to chill?" Say no or pretend
To have plans and no time to spend,
I decided to shut off my phone,
At least then it's my choice to be alone,
I heal with **** the only way I know,
I tripped and fell, as usual I'm on my own.
I attempt to stand up, need a helping hand,
But no one is there, this isn't what I planned,
I'm unworthy where I fell, so why would I stand?
Where did I go wrong? I need to understand.
Flames dance around me, life is a living hell,
Eyes blink but don't see, it's easy to tell,
The whole ******* world is under a spell,
You happily buy the ******* they sell.

(HOOK)

If life is a race I'm finishing last,
The future is near but I'm stuck in the past.
This is an accumulation of random thoughts I have
Amanda Kay Burke
Written by
Amanda Kay Burke  29/F/Alaska
(29/F/Alaska)   
257
     Lorenzo Neltje
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