Philosophers, poets, and parents alike Will advise you to stay focused on the future To not stand rooted with one foot in the past
But how can I walk forward When I am anchored to the ground Drowning in my anxieties and doubts?
Guarding my heart and head Like a snake slithering around it’s nest One wrong step or misplaced sound And the vicious bite will take my life
So I bury my head in old photo albums, re-read books that once made me feel free, And wash my sheets every Sunday So that the smell of lavender and linen never leaves my skin
Then I wonder to myself Why Christmas doesn’t warm my heart anymore Or why the water at our lakes edge for once in my life Feels cold why I don’t laugh as much as I used to
I trouble my mind so much That I have to distract myself Just to stop worrying about wasted time And to rid the recurring realization That at this moment I am oldest I have ever been And the youngest I will ever be
When did getting older become so complicated? When did it start to feel suffocating Instead of liberating.