I checked on you regularly to maybe just know that you were there somewhere... it wasn't out of love, or curiosity, or even obsession. I just kinda missed you on occasions but not with the idea to want you back. Because I wouldn't ever want you back, or the agony, or the deep, harrowing experience of every deeply harrowing emotion ever. And still I have only half moved on. Because I see you and it means to me. I never show, you'd never know, but something still matters whether or not I want it to.
I don't want it to.