I know, i should have known
better, the one person
i wanted, only wanted me
when he was drunk.
And i tried to stay
away,
but he was a drug to me.
He would never do this sober,
but when he was drunk
he would kiss me from my lips to my shoulders,
he would take me in his arms,
and he would feed this false sense of hope
into my heart,
and i knew it was all fake.
But i didn't care because i just
needed something to sedate.
Something to remind me
of what's it's like to feel
warmth,
even just for a second.
Because any other moment of the
day my blood ran cold,
and i feared that he might be the only
thing to heat me up.
Even though i tried so many times
to kick him out,
he always came back.
Like a disease.