lazy summer afternoons spent escaping the Georgia heat
pollution from the city intertwines itself with our damaged skin
i sit on his front porch as he and I torture our lungs
i never experienced him outside the four walls surrounding his bedroom
it was those walls he felt more secure;
a recluse out of insecurity, not desire
the sun and moon,
i rise in the morning just as he begins to set
only to be awoken by a sudden terror that if tomorrow is never guaranteed,
why should i waste a third of my life sleeping
when I'd rather be in the arms of a man who never shows his face?
i recall i fell in love with him many times,
once when i saw him hiding in the back row of the theater,
another when i heard his rasp in a voicemail,
after we made love in a room with no AC,
and once more when i followed you into a dimly lit room
i fell in love as you slipped your hand into mine
and the velvet underground played somberly,
and drowned out the white noise that came out of my mouth
as i whispered in your ear;
"If I Could Make The World As Pure"
please, make this easy on me
"And Strange As What I See"
i often have to wipe away tears as you turn your back
"I'd Put You In A Mirror"
and put on your clothes
"I Put In Front Of Me"
i'll mumble an I love you
"Linger On, Pale Blue Eyes"
and hope you mean it as you repeat it back
"Linger On, Pale Blue Eyes"
there is too much to lose, i am scaring both of us