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Jul 2017
In the wildlife and brambles
of swallowing reality
I am animated with my friends,
Silent in the face of my enemy.
This is the nature of me,
my jaundiced and lily-livered,
Blossoming weeds.

In the torrid heat of the garden
Plastic petals cushioned by a non-existent breeze
The expensive and perfect roses speak
In a high and thin voice:
“She doesn’t belong here!”
I maintain distance, observing quietly,
Drinking in supple thoughts
My type of nourishment.

How strange! While we all exist,
I realise I am mostly the only one
Alone in this thistle-thorn entangle--
Spikes on spikes--
And these roses are cruel,
They bite my stems,
They scythe through my stalks.
They make it sound
with their chorus of coy voices,
That I am strangling them,
with my unkempt leaves.

Nonetheless odd and daring
In the best sense of the word
I was a bore to the masses
Amidst the roses’ mellifluous clamour
which was static white noise
and superfluous torrential chastisement
But I’m safe in knowing
that their words will crumble to dirt one day
And that being “social”, was just an experiment.

I left the town
in search of a happier place.

I am twisting skywards
for brighter light each day.

Do not misunderstand that I am completely alone,
I am better outside the garden now
As a light globular lump on the open road
Thriving on even the forgotten and sighing wind.
Occasionally I come across another fellow being
I wouldn’t want to choke with my untamed growth,
And we find sweet comfort in unspoken words
Between two lost, closet souls.

I would invite them graciously
To my snug abodes of desert peace,
To tumble about carefree
With the gentle caress of warm currents
Finding solace in vastness and anonymity
When we ride freedom breezes through scorched skies.
As the sun dips and glows behind the last clouds on the horizon,
We’ll be roaming further still from the plastic perfect roses
We’ll be together in the knotted wild,
Tumbleweed friends, you and I.
I'm so sorry for the length, I just couldn't seem to shorten any part of it. I'm constantly worried about being the 'outsider' and one of my worst fears is loneliness, that stems from a lack of emotional connection despite the vast multitudes of people around me. Somehow I always can't seem to fit in with the majority and I hate it. But I guess I would rather have a few close friends I can share my feelings with than to know everyone in the room... Maybe it suits me better because then there would be people who I can stick with through thick and thin. So this poem is dedicated to those amazing friends of mine who know the pain of my scars. I love you truly <3
Eiram N
Written by
Eiram N  16/F/in books
(16/F/in books)   
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