Sometimes life is extremely ironic,
And laughs at us in our faces.

Like -
Going to church does not make you a Christian,
it won't hide the fact that you're a thief, a liar, a *** or gay.
Taking pills, won't suddenly shake you out of the state you're in,
it won't make you sane.
Placing your feelings and thoughts on paper
Does not make you a poet,
It doesn't not make you a writer.
Getting A's does not make you smart,
Neither do D's make you an idiot.
Clenching your fists and trying to fight back tears,
Won't take away the hurt,
It won't take away the pain,
It won't make you less of a crybaby
Because sometimes you're shattered,
And those tears
Come falling like a waterfall,
And nothing you do can stop it.


What's more sad is,
Having a significant other,
Whose smile is like the sun,
Whose eyes reminds you of coffee,
Whose lips taste feels like stroking icecream with
your tongue,
Except it's not cold,
And whose touch is like no other
Doesn't not cure your depression.
No matter how much sunlight they give off,
The sun always goes down,
It always makes way for the dark.
No matter how their eyes remind you of
something you love,
Sometimes you get lost in them,
And all you see is the reflection of someone you
sometimes detest.
No matter how much their lips feels smooth like
ice cream,
Sometimes mouths get tired, and all that reminds
you of are those that have gotten tired of you all
your life.
No matter how much their touch magic,
Sometimes you're reminded of
All the bad touches you've received in
your life.

You're my sun,
But I've always been dark,
You're the sun,
But sometimes all you can manage to do
Is dry up my rains.

No amount of sun can dry up my oceans,
to stop me drowning in the oceans of sadness inside of me.

-antxthesis

h.s. // 4:24am // 9/7/17 // some days the sun stops shining, some days the sun isn't enough