i did, and i don't know why

was it because i held on a hope?
a hope that maybe it would be mutual
that even if that day it wasn't
that one day it would be?

was it because it reminded me of you?
to always remember that there's someone
someone out there looking out for me
who actually cared about me?

or was it because i still love you?
even though i said it over
and over and over and over
it's all in the past?

maybe i'm lying to myself
maybe i'm lying to you