If I have to tell myself
on a Wednesday—
a Wednesday morning no less—
that I should think
a little more than usual
because I am, after all,
getting high and still
a little drunk,
then I’m making another drink.

But now, when I get smoke in my eyes
or puke before noon
or spend all my money online
or eat all the oreos
I won’t know where I’ll be tomorrow.
There are only so many
stop signs to steal,
and besides,
they always get replaced.

But I still want to stay drunk
and spend my Wednesday mornings high
and puke when I wanna
and spend my whole paycheck online
and eat more oreos.

If I could settle down,
then I would settle down.
Isn’t that how the song goes?