Anger lashing out like waves hitting the shores within Blinded by the fire, lacking where to begin Breathlessly fighting for life yet holding my breath Not believing that it's over,clinging to regret Now that you're gone what's left is paper and pen Without a difference between now and then Except you being gone and never returning And my mind burning and soul still yearning Thoughts running east and then back to west Searching for memories, a holy grail quest Crumpling the papers as if they're responsible For the beautiful poetry but finding no rhyme Choosing to embrace loneliness and enjoy the crucible Wishing by pushing back the clock I'd rewind time Forgetting to draw back the curtains battling fright Waking to horrors and creepers of the night Trapped in the biting cold, hardly finding sleep Wide eyed even after counting a million sheep Searching for your fragrance in the sheets Failing, like the recollection of how I you meets Abandoning my bed and staggering in the darkness Crushing over stuff searching for the switch Wishing I still had the lamp you took with you by my bed Or the phone I broke angered by your satirical tweet It's like you were never here for your absent in my head Hit as I turn on the blinding light by the current Taking a **** and back to my PC to search for torrents The movies I trashed when you left, songs I deleted Now I treasure them as much as I had hated Two three songs, I find memories lost in years Only to start another war,battling back my tears The scars are open and I bleed in love again My passion for you is as fresh as the pain Sadly I can't pelt the staring walls with my PC She's an expensive and only source of my torturous peace So my pillow takes her place and the potted flower Funny I got strength for this but not will power I need help but then will anyone understand? Alone and accused on the boulevard of broken dreams Jealous as the first ray of dawn kisses the sky Onto the same staring walls I lean as I cry Cursing where I've been, unsure of where I'm going like lost fountains in a stream I want to tell God to stop this crazy ride and I get off And right there dizzy conjures my eyes and I sleep off