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calm Jan 2018
skinny dipping, sea's so cold.
Posideon must be tripping,
'cos this view's so bold.
your hair now in a mess,
you can't be controlled.
your imperfections perfect,
oh my, baby I'm sold.
Not really a poem, just a small rhyme I thought of today I decided to share. Hope y'all enjoyed.
calm Jan 2018
Music blaring violently loud
You can hear it every word even though he's wearing headphones
Not concentrating,
He quickly goes through cupboards
Finding a glass
Then slowly but surely pulls open the fridge door
He wants a drink of milk, like when he was seven and rushing around the garden til his chest hurt
Having the time of his life
Until he needed a drink
Water? Yuck. Boooooring!
Juice? His mother would disapprove of that until after dinner.
Milk? Seems like the only good option.
The boy, now a man at 22 again, chuckles to himself as the song ends and he remembers what life was like as a child.
So innocent, so pure.

Then the song ends. A new one begins.
Your song.
His hand unwillingly jerks, spilling milk on the polished-to-perfection-counter,
He curses and puts down the bottle, sliding the cap on as tight as possible so he feels he still has strength in him.
He curses repeatedly,
But not because of the spilt milk.
But because he forgot.
All pictures were deleted from phones, all text messages ignored, all social media blocked
But he forgot about the song.

He hurries to find something to mop it up
And he tries hard not to
But he lets the lyrics pour into his brain
And he begins to crumble all over again

He remembers.
He remembers you telling him
"There's no point crying over spilt milk."
Yet his eyes are prickling with tears.
He chuckles because he thinks that's what he's doing
He believes that he is crying over spilling milk on his polished-to-perfection-counter in his tiny flat in the large, daunting city.
But he isn't.
And deep down
He hears a voice telling him he isn't.

But he won't listen to that voice.
He has to get over you.
He has gotten over you already.
Angry, pathetic tears fall down his face
As he sinks down to the ground
Looking into nowhere
But seeing only you

His hands tremble ever so slightly
As he fishes around for his phone
Buried deep in his pocket.
He begins to whimper slightly
But tells himself he is a grown up
And how he needs to act like one.

He slowly and uncertainly unlocks his phone
Which no longer has a selfie of him and you as a lockscreen
And fingers shaking with regret
He presses 'delete'
Just as the song ends

And just like that
Tears pour out of nowhere
As if he was suddenly hit on the back and they were pushed out
As if he was a bottle of milk
And someone's arm jolted
So what he had been holding in for too long
Just
       spilt
               like
                      milk.
This is another oldie, as you can maybe tell from the way I wrote it. I've always liked this one of mine, even though it may not be my most well-written piece ever. I just love the emotion in it is all. Hope you enjoy.
  Jan 2018 calm
Sara Leal
To: You
From: Me

Open this letter when you feel like you have no more reason to stay alive~
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Hey! Cheer up! It's just a bad moment, a really bad one. I know you can pass through it and later on you'll see that it wasn't that bad. I do know because I also have those moments, when I just want to break down and let go everything. So I know that right now it is that bad, with all those negative thoughts inside your head, with all those voices screaming that you're in pain, that you're not needed, that you want to get away from all this. Don't do that, don't get away from it, don't let those voices get to you, it's not your time yet, you have a lot that you should fight for. You have a lot of reasons to keep going and I'm one of them as you're one for me. And remember, I'm here with you. You're not alone in this.
                                                 
       ­                                           Sara Leal
                                                           ­                                      24/01/18
The second one out of some. A new series of letters dedicated to you. I hope you feel it like I did.
calm Jan 2018
"What do you wanna be when you grow up?"

Only one word comes to mind.

Yours.

I want to be yours.

I want to come home to see your car driving in ahead of me every night, so you can stick your tongue out at me and mock how I arrived there last.

I want to have little reminders of you running about the place making messes, so I can hug them and kiss their chubby little cheeks and can care for when you're away somewhere. At work, perhaps.

I want to wake up next to you in the middle of the night and make pancakes and go to that park nearby you always loved, even if it meant being tired in the morning when we'd have to do it all again with our little munchkins because obviously we wouldn't exclude them from all our fun.

I want to be scolded by you when I forget to go shopping for groceries and for buying the kids donuts without warning and telling them to keep it a secret, even though it would hurt my feelings a little. Because you would never really hurt me.

I want to pretend not to be crying when those kids turn eighteen and are going to college and we find ourselves suddenly living in a house that's too big and lonely once we realise how old we really are.



I want to wake up in the middle of the night and make pancakes and take a stroll in that park nearby you always loved, even if it meant I'd be tired the next day when I'd wake up to a house far too big for one person but filled with enough loving memories to keep me going.




"What do you wanna be when you grow up?" you asked.





"I dunno."



"A writer, maybe."
Another old piece of mine.
  Jan 2018 calm
Busbar Dancer
We rise
not like smoke from the flame
to demonstrate
the Law of Conservation of Energy
-matter shifting forms-
Violent change followed by
heavenward ascension.

We rise
not like the phoenix from the ashes.
No glorious re-emergence from
the ruined form
of what came before.
No rebirth as
the middle stage
of an endless cycle.

Instead
we rise
like an orchid, blooming,
up from the shitheap.
We reach for the sun
even while
our roots sink deep into the filth.

This chain was my home.
This chain is my home.
This chain
will not
always be my home.

I’ve seen a hundred things stranger than
a ship that steers itself.

Not all slaves
have a master
after all.
calm Jan 2018
the old wall-clock
ticks.

somewhere in the world
a bedroom light flickers
out.

it is not very late at night,
yet somebody's day is
ending.

they do not shed tears,
nor do they mumble
silent last words, as
they are as empty as
a broken-hearted soldier
who has forgotten how
to live and breathe normally
again.

they do not take in
a longing glance at the
world once more,
nor do they linger in
their thoughts to hear
what their final memories
have to say to them in this precious
moment.

a rope of some kind
is tied to a fixed
bar.

a line that haunted them
for many weeks, screaming
"Do it.".


the old wall-clock
ticks.


then it tocks.


a light flickers
out.
Something I wrote a while back. Changed the title of it however, so if you've read it before somehow and think I'm stealing someone else's work and changing the title to make it mine, don't worry because it's mine.
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